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Bean Offline
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Starting School - September 29th 2009, 06:33 AM

Hellos...

I have been home-schooled since the age of 8. It used to be really awesome, and I loved it and learned loads and had many friends. This last couple of years has been alot harder for me, with friendships breaking, and the onset of social anxiety, self harm and depression. I'm not sure what is caused by what, but I do know that I am not happy the way I am. So... I have the option of going to school next year.

Part of me desperately wants to, and the other part of me desperately doesn't. I would be going into year 13 (but possibly year 12) and I don't know if people would accept a newcomer into their social circles. Social anxiety would make it a huge effort for me, and if it isn't going to work, then I don't want to even try, but there is that nagging part of me that says 'go on, enroll, you know you want to'

The school is a very nice one, and I am in the 'zone' for it, so I would definately be accepted.

I am torn as of what to do? Going to school would mean that I would have to stop doing some of the things I really enjoy, but if I go could I be happier?

Could I have your opinions please?


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Re: Starting School - September 29th 2009, 06:42 AM

Well if you go and don't like it there's always the option of dropping out but if you don't go then you'll never know if you'd have enjoyed it. I'd say go for it and I think you'll be surprised at how many people would actually let you in their social circles.
   
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Re: Starting School - September 29th 2009, 07:41 PM

Have you talked to your parents and seen what they said? They may let you try and if all else fails drop out. Seeing that you think it's a nice school then I'm sure people are going to be friendly towards you...? Maybe some of your friends go to that school....?


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Re: Starting School - September 29th 2009, 08:13 PM

There is a really big decision to make and only you can decide what you really want to do. Going to school does have many advantages like meeting lots of new people. People should be accepting they might be happy that there is a new person and everyone might want to be your friend. Fitting in can be hard but you will meet so many people if you went to school. It might be tough to start with but it will get easier once you get to know people. I would say go to school.
   
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Re: Starting School - September 30th 2009, 02:05 PM

I have to agree with Jen, and say that this is your choice.

I don't think making friends will be as hard as you think it will be. If you join a club or sports team, it is very easy to make friends. Another great way of meeting people is through your elective. I've found that if people have the same elective as you, they often have more in common.

I don't think you should drop out right away if it doesn't work out. I know this sounds harsh, but things might suck in the beginning, I'm not going to lie. But if you tough it out and give it a chance, then things will get better. I just don't want you to give up on yourself.
Whichever you choose, I hope it works out for the best.
   
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Re: Starting School - October 6th 2009, 12:41 AM

Thanks. I'm still torn though. Some days I really feel up to it, and other days I find the thought insane, and want to keep doing same thing I know. Next year is my last year, so it is really my last chance. I only know one other person who goes to this school (an ex-homeschooler) but she is in year 9, and I would be going into year 13.

I hate having to make this difficult decision. *sigh*


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Re: Starting School - October 7th 2009, 03:59 AM

I'd say give it a shot! You have nothing to lose, and if nothing, it will be an experience. Go into school with an open heart (oh God, yoga is rubbing off on me ) and don't be afraid to talk to people you don't know. This year I switched schools, and was totally nervous! I played it off cool though, and made conversation with the other kids like I would with anyone I was familiar with. Wikipedia has some atricles about making friends in high school. Don't bother with more than one or two though, they're all pretty much the same. There are also some really great books in the library for self help/self esteem/shyness. They should all be in the same section. Make sure to prepare yourself emotionally, and feel good about the switch before you do it. It will make the process so much easier.

Also, have you considered any antidepressants/anti-anxiety medications? I know I totally sound like a pill pusher, and I understand this may not be an option for you... but... My Lexapro has helped me come out of my shell, and feel more confident talking to unfamiliar people. Make sure and ask your parents before you get attatched to the idea, or even consider it.

Give yourself a week, or if you can tolerate it, two at the school. Don't be discouraged if you don't make friends right away, and definitely don't compare yourself to the other kids. Teenagers, and people in general, often fall into this trap. If you don't try the big school, and have an awful time homeschooling you'll always wonder "what if?". Give me a pm if ya want!
   
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