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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
ladyninetyfour Offline
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Angry I feel so fake =[ - October 9th 2009, 07:38 PM

Hey
I feel like such a fake, as the title says. I'm really clever. I mean like straight As and Bs without any effort or revision. I just remember stuff in exams just like that. I think about it and poof I get the answers. I good at languages (Latin, German, Japanese, French and Spanish), Maths, Science and especially English. I want to become a lawyer so I'm gonna get straight A*s in my GCSEs and A Levels with a little bit of extra work. I sound so cocky right?
Well here's my problem. I don't really wanna be that kid. That geek (okay, I have geeky tendencies but I'm cool, really, I go to parties lol) with the good grades and rod stuck up her ass. Really I just wanna be a model, or an actress, or a singer, or even a housewife in a cosy little flat (that's my dream really). I feel so fake, no one knows this. I just wanted to get that off my chest - that I feel like this big fake acting like I'm so happy, and clever, and like I don't care - except for my grades. Well I'm not. I'm depressed, and I wanna be someone else, and right now I don't care about my grades or school. I just wanna have a life of my own, and have some fun!!
xoxox Bex xoxox


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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 9th 2009, 08:06 PM

Hi Bex,
There's nothing to say you can't get those grades and have fun and party. It just requires a bit of balance. Even if you did want to be a singer there's no harm in studying for your GCSEs. Having GCSEs and A levels won't stop you from becoming a singer. Keep your chin up and give it all you've got. I'm sure you'll find it rewarding at the end of it.




   
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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 9th 2009, 09:23 PM

Good For You! Pass Ur gcse's and do good in school continue ur life e.g working hard and goin out. stop thinking ur living for now and live for the future. when u have finished that, u can consider wat u'd like to do with the rest of ur life but its important to do well so u have something to fall back on.
well done for writing this. u sound,, honest not cocky.
Good Luck!


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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 9th 2009, 10:11 PM

theres nothing wrong with being an intelligent singer or actress.


..and our dreams will break the boundaries of our fears..



   
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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 9th 2009, 11:18 PM

I felt like I wanted to be famous a few years ago so I applied for the X Factor. When I got a letter back from them though I'd thought about it more and decided that my education had to come first. If you don't get GCSE's or A Levels then what are you going to do if the singing fails? You won't be able to get into a uni or get a career going unless you go back to school. So why not just get all your GCSEs and A Levels first and then go off and try to be a singer so that you'll always have something to fall back on.
   
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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 10th 2009, 03:08 PM

The thing is, you don't have to give up your life to get good grades. There is no reason why you can't go to parties and still put time aside to study. It's true- you do need VERY good grades to do Law at any half decent University, but you don't have to sacrifice everything.

The only problem with your dreams is that they're very likely to change, and you don't want to end up in 10 years time having gone to all the parties but not got the grades you need, and regretting it. Getting the grades leaves your options open - no matter what you chose.

Oh, and don't worry about sounding cocky. I was like you when I was your age. You'll get to A' Level and suddenly find you have to work for it, and all the cockiness will be knocked out of you.
   
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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 11th 2009, 07:21 PM

Err thanks everyone, but I don't feel any less fake. I know I've got to concentrate on my GCSEs, even my tarot cards are telling me I need to be commited and tolerate everything right now... but I just can't be bothered. That sounds so lazy. It's not like I can't be bothere cuz I just don't wanna do the work, I cant be bothered because I feel like I'm wasting my time. I know I'll get good grades, probably some of the top in my school, but what's the point if the grades don't actually make me happy??! x


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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 12th 2009, 04:17 PM

Honey, you seem like you don't really wanna be a lawyer. Do whatever you wanna do with life, with your impressive list of skills, you could do anything!


“I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” Harvey Milk, 1978

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Re: I feel so fake =[ - October 12th 2009, 06:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PunkRoxS9 View Post
Err thanks everyone, but I don't feel any less fake. I know I've got to concentrate on my GCSEs, even my tarot cards are telling me I need to be commited and tolerate everything right now... but I just can't be bothered. That sounds so lazy. It's not like I can't be bothere cuz I just don't wanna do the work, I cant be bothered because I feel like I'm wasting my time. I know I'll get good grades, probably some of the top in my school, but what's the point if the grades don't actually make me happy??! x
Because good grades give you options. You're what, 15 right now? I hate to be harsh here, but a lot of people go through a phase at that age of wanting to be a singer, or an actor, or a dancer or something like that. The chances of you a) still wanting that in 3-4 years time, b) actually being good enough to succeed and c) succeeding are really very small, and you don't want to end up either realising that it's not what you want to do, or that you're not good enough, but not having anything to fall back on. Grades give you the fall back. They give you options and leave everything open to you. So regardless of whether they make you happy or not, it would be a waste not to the best you can. Even if you do then chose you want to go into singing or whatever it is you want.
   
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