personal statement for uni

[Ella.x]

Okay, so I'm in the process of applying to go back to university next year to do an undergrad degree in adult nursing. The only thing my application is waiting on is my personal statement. I've got a very rough breakdown of all the things that I feel I should include, but I need some help since it's been 3 years since I last wrote one. I'm basing it off my CV, but here's a breakdown of the sections and major points that I want to include:

Introduction - why nursing? passion for caring, self-improvement through learning

Work as a carer - skills in stress-management, communication skills, I'm not scared of providing personal care/dealing with unpleasant aspects of personal care

NVQ - currently studying in my spare time for a qualification on healht & social care - shows commitment, time management, determination

Living situation - living independantly for 2 years now, shows responsibility, motivation, independance and maturity.

Hobbies & interests - show that I have an active social life and am well-rounded

Some sort of conclusion


This is the main framework that I've got so far. Does anyone have any suggestions/additions/advice on how to make this an amazing personal statement to make up for the fact that the first time i went to uni, I failed miserably? I'm so nervous about this. I could also do with some advice on how to pass the occupational health assessment as I was rejected for a job with the NHS a year ago due to my mental health (self-harm, which I'm trying really hard to stop, depression, several suicide attempts and poddible borderline personality disorder)

Please please please someone help me!

[The Morrigan]

Hey Ella,

I think you've got a pretty good framework there for your statement, I used a similar one myself

For your conclusion I definitely recommend showing your enthusiasm for the course and you could also add in your career plans so it shows that you know where you're heading in life and that you have ambition.

Also, if you have space then maybe write about how you've developed and changed as a person since you were last at university so it shows that things will be different when you go back and you won't fail again this time.

I hope this helped, if you need any more help then just PM me. Also, good luck with writing it!

[Ella.x]

oooh I forgot about career plans! I'll be sure to add that in. Thankyou so much

[Anatidaephobia]

Hey (:

I've just finished my personal statement and i found that what really helped was to go onto the university websites that i wanted to apply for and a lot of them had guides on how to write personal statements and what to include. You can also see examples online to give you some ideas which can help.

As Cara has said i would include future career plans.
I think that you also need to talk about recent academic study. Such as if you did well in a subject at school, say science? and then relate that to nursing. This can help boost your personal statement.

You also need to talk about what how your course and uni itself will benifit you. I think that this would fit best in your conclusion.

I hope this helped (:
Good luck with applying <3

[Ella.x]

Thanks for the input I've mostly only put work related stuff and the current qualification I'm doing in health and social care as I will be a mature student and out of education for 3 years by the time I start the course. They will be able to see my results from school and college (I did quite well in biology), however as it's not recent, I chose to leave it out of the statement.
Heres my first draft, it needs to be nearly twice this length, but it's pretty rough at the moment. (the bits in red are the bits i'm not sure I like)

“Why would you want to go into nursing? It’s such a stressful career” is something that I have heard several times, and in the next 45 lines, I hope to convey my passion and dedication for this degree course and career to you.
I am an extremely hard-working individual. Currently working full-time as a home care assistant, I work long hours, adhere to a strict schedule, and often deal with challenging behaviour and stressful situations. Making a difference to somebody’s day is the best reward you could hope for. It is time for me to indulge my passion for learning, my interest in the medical field, and my desire to help others by starting a Degree in Adult Nursing.
My work as a carer has given me a great sense of responsibility and maturity. It has allowed me to greatly improve my stress-management skills, communication, and has only made my passion for helping others stronger. As a carer, I am already familiar with some medical terminology and procedures including MAR sheets, caring for pressure sores and infection control. I believe this basic knowledge will provide an excellent starting point for my pathway into nursing.
Through my job, I am currently studying for a Level 2 Diploma in Health and Social Care. All study is done in my own time, with no seminars, lectures or set books. This is preparing me for the independent study that is expected in University students. At the time of writing, I have completed 12% of the required modules within the last 3 weeks, which shows excellent time-management skills. My goal within this course is to complete all assignments by February 2012, and I am well on my way to doing so.
I am proud of my independence, responsibility and determination, which have all been key in acquiring the things that I want from life, such as living independently for the last 2 years, changing career paths from retail to care, and providing a stable life for myself.
My plan for the future is, after completing my Degree in Adult Nursing to complete a PG Dip in Adult Nursing, then join the NMC register and begin practising as a registered nurse, with the possibility of doing further study in learning disability nursing.
In conclusion, I am reliable, hard-working, and determined to better myself through higher education. I guarantee that accepting me onto a Degree in Adult Nursing will be the right decision.



Any tweaks, sggestions etc will be much appreciated

[chickenonsteroids]

Originally Posted by Ella.x

Thanks for the input I've mostly only put work related stuff and the current qualification I'm doing in health and social care as I will be a mature student and out of education for 3 years by the time I start the course. They will be able to see my results from school and college (I did quite well in biology), however as it's not recent, I chose to leave it out of the statement.
Heres my first draft, it needs to be nearly twice this length, but it's pretty rough at the moment. (the bits in red are the bits i'm not sure I like)

“Why would you want to go into nursing? It’s such a stressful career” is something that I have heard several times, and in the next 45 lines, I hope to convey my passion and dedication for this degree course and career to you.
Cut that bit out, they know what your personal statement is meant to do. It wastes space and the rhetorical questions aren't always useful.
I am an extremely hard-working individual. Currently working full-time as a home care assistant, I work long hours, adhere to a strict schedule, and often deal with challenging behaviour and stressful situations. Making a difference to somebody’s day is the best reward you could hope for. It is time for me to indulge my passion for learning, my interest in the medical field, and my desire to help others by starting a Degree in Adult Nursing.
My work as a carer has given me a great sense of responsibility and maturity. It has allowed me to greatly improve my stress-management skills, communication, and has only made my passion for helping others stronger. As a carer, I am already familiar with some medical terminology and procedures including MAR sheets, caring for pressure sores and infection control. I believe this basic knowledge will provide an excellent starting point for my pathway into nursing.
Through my job, I am currently studying for a Level 2 Diploma in Health and Social Care. All study is done in my own time, with no seminars, lectures or set books. This is preparing me for the independent study that is expected in University students. At the time of writing, I have completed 12% of the required modules within the last 3 weeks, which shows excellent time-management skills. My goal within this course is to complete all assignments by February 2012, and I am well on my way to doing so.
I am proud of my independence, responsibility and determination, which have all been key in acquiring the things that I want from life, such as living independently for the last 2 years, changing career paths from retail to care, and providing a stable life for myself.
My plan for the future is, after completing my Degree in Adult Nursing to complete a PG Dip in Adult Nursing, then join the NMC register and begin practising as a registered nurse, with the possibility of doing further study in learning disability nursing.
In conclusion, I am reliable, hard-working, and determined to better myself through higher education. I guarantee that accepting me onto a Degree in Adult Nursing will be the right decision.

Any tweaks, sggestions etc will be much appreciated

I managed to actually delete what i wrote lol. I've added a few suggestions to the statement. The things in green i think you should get rid of, they are small and save space because you want to get more useful information in the statement.

After reading it, it's an ok statement but i can't really comment on it more as my knowledge comes from reading other statements :P