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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
TraitorBaby Offline
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Stories for motivation - February 22nd 2018, 07:16 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Anybody have an experience where you overcome all odds, like get out of an abusive household or relationship and do something good with your life, or just get through school or something, despite depression or anxiety or doubts? Something like that.
I'm trying to get my work done so I can succeed but I just can't. I can't bring myself to do it, I don't see a reason to. Everything's against me, and I don't see a way past this. It seems like you guys have been to he'll and back, and your still willing to put yourselves aside to help other people, so yyouve got to have something.... right? Anything at all would help.

Last edited by .:Bibliophile:.; February 22nd 2018 at 10:59 PM. Reason: Adding a trigger prefix
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Re: Stories for motivation - February 22nd 2018, 10:58 PM

IDK if my 'stories' count but I have a few things that I have improved on when the odds were against me.

I was pretty deep into harming myself and it was to the point where my doctors were concerned and thinking I was going to have to go to residential and figure out a higher level of care.

That was back in 2013, I think. I have not been to a higher level of care. I have gotten a lot better in regards to my mental health and self harm. My psychiatrist and I were recently talking about it and he told me the progress I made was astounding and he remembers that a few years back I was struggling so much with school and life and now I have gotten to a better place and have completed my AA and am currently in the process of looking for work.

Essentially, there were a lot of professionals who weren't sure that I would get to this point. They never outright told me that because you never know but they were really worried about me for a long period of time.

IDK that this helps in any way but I can say that things can get better. Those things tend to improve gradually too. The changes I have gone through took a lot of time.

I do still struggle and I have bad days, weeks or months (currently dealing with that) but I am doing a lot better, mentally, than I ever have. Of course, I get scared it won't stay this good and I'll fall back etc but I keep trying to move forward and hope for the best.

(I am adding a trigger prefix because I feel that some people might be able to share but the content might include some triggering information. )

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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Stories for motivation - February 23rd 2018, 01:32 PM

I don't know if my story counts, but my life seems to be a series of problems and while I still have a way to go, I have made it this far!

I was abused when I was 9, and never had any help dealing with it. I felt different to everyone else, and friends in school would only use me to do their school work. I thought that when I got high school, things would be okay. I was confident I could cope with the work, and thought that I could make friends. Well, as it turns out, it was never meant to be that way for me. I didn't have any friends at all, and the people I hung out with only wanted to change me and make me be like them...I was very aware of feeling 'different' but never knowing why. I was anxious every single day before school, for 7 years, even on 'good' days. I cried a lot and missed primary school a lot because it was the only place I felt safe, loved and happy. I started having panic attacks. But still no help. By the time I got to 6th form, I dreaded leaving school and going to university. I hadn't really settled in, had no friends, convinced myself I was going to be a teacher (while completely disregarding that my mental health wasn't the best) and yet, didn't even have the slightest idea of how to look after myself. I dreaded university because I failed some exams (although I did really well in previous exams) and didn't know if I would cope and didn't think I would make any friends.

Despite that, I did make it into university and I did actually make friends! I didn't move out for personal reasons, and I did end up struggling after graduating (my father passed away, I realised I probably wasn't cut out for teaching but was terrified of not knowing what to do, and a bunch of other things going on). But I wouldn't have changed it for the world. I'm the first person in my family to get to university and graduate, and the friends I made then, I still have now. Not only that but when I was volunteering at an event in university, the topic of child abuse came up, and one of the volunteers said that she knows none of us had been abused because we're all in uni, and people who have been abused don't go to uni....I didn't say anything, but it really made me look back and think that despite the things I have been through, I made it this far!

Volunteering here on TeenHelp has been a real eye opener and I have learnt so much and it's even got me interested in another career (counselling) which is amazing because I never thought I could help others...I felt like I was always the one needing help, I couldn't possibly be the one offering it.

There's still a load of challenges ahead for me, I know. But I made it this far. I have friends now, and they are understanding. I understand my mental health more now and have a counsellor. I get my down days, of course, wondering whether I'll get the life I want or not, but the only thing I know for sure is that I have to at least try.

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Re: Stories for motivation - February 25th 2018, 04:00 AM

I've overcome a few different things in my life (just like a lot of people) such as being in a controlling and abusive relationship and with OCD but if it wasn't for my will power, I don't think I would have made it through. I believe I am quite resilient so I took some time out to recover before I moved on.

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Re: Stories for motivation - February 25th 2018, 09:04 PM

Jo, guess what? We do not have our shit together, no matter how it looks by our posts.

I don't have any traumatic, life-altering stories that got me to where I am today. But I have experienced obstacles with my disabilities. What I learnt is in addition to living with it, I have to learn how to manage it. It's not as easy as it sounds, especially in a world where everyone prefers word of mouth (literally) rather than helpful alternatives for the Deaf. Do I always go about it the mature way? Nope.

Like I said, we don't have our shit together 100%. For me, my lack of shit-togetherness is my tolerance and emotional maturity.

I know this probably didn't help, but hopefully it has given you a new perspective.
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Re: Stories for motivation - March 6th 2018, 07:07 AM

I spent three years in an abusive relationship and had basically resigned myself to the fact that I was never going to get out of it. As far as I was concerned, it was just the way my life was going to be and I had brought it on myself by choosing this person, even though I hadn't known at the time what she would become.

Most days, I was walking on eggshells desperately trying to avoid doing or saying anything that would give her an excuse to lash out at me. I learned how to protect myself, how to fit the mold she had created, and how to act like nothing was going on behind closed doors when we were in the public eye. I even convinced myself that it was okay and that the good times that we did have, as few and far between as they were, were worth all of the toxicity. At the back of my mind, I knew it wasn't true, but convincing myself of that helped me survive it.

In February 2016, I got out of that relationship. I'm still not sure how it happened. There was never an official end. One day, she just stopped contacting me and I took the opportunity and ran without looking back. The way I saw it, I had finally gotten my "get out of jail free" card and I wasn't going to waste it.

That relationship did a lot of damage to my life due to certain actions she took in an effort to scare me into submission and it continues to have a significant impact on the person that I am today. I'm not the same person that I was when it started and I'm not sure that I ever will be again. It changed me down to my core and it's deeply affected my ability to trust other people and changed the way I interact with others.

Two years later, I'm in a healthy, happy, loving relationship with a wonderful girl and have two soon to be stepchildren. I'm building my family from the ground up, seeking therapy, and am slowly learning how to be a real person again instead of a shell of one. I'm still healing and I probably will be for a long time. But, I'm okay. Whatever is going on in your life, you will be too.

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