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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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  (#9001 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 6th 2020, 01:00 PM

I can’t help but be afraid of men everyday. I’m worried about school and stressed about this election. Ugh ��



"I'm not a piece of cake for you to just discard
While you walk away with the frosting of my heart
So I'm taking back what's mine, you'll miss
The slice of heaven that I gave to you last night
." - "Cake" by Melanie Martinez



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  (#9002 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 8th 2020, 03:54 AM

I can't do this anymore.


   
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  (#9003 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 8th 2020, 05:31 AM

Just ONE more shift and I can FINALLY have a day off. I need it sooo bad.


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  (#9004 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 9th 2020, 02:28 AM

I don't want to have mental health issues anymore.


   
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  (#9005 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 9th 2020, 05:28 AM

I need to find time to do laundry but I have so many appointments this week! There's no real time to spend a few hours dedicated to a public washer/dryer! I wish I had my own washer and dryer in my apartment. That would make things so much easier.



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  (#9006 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 9th 2020, 07:59 AM

I'm so sick of having a girlfriend. I bitched and whined on this site for like eight fuckin years wishing for one, and now I just want to leave and travel the country as a nomad.
   
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  (#9007 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 10th 2020, 02:19 AM

I'm hoping everything will be OK.


   
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  (#9008 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 10th 2020, 10:31 AM

Why is it that everyone but me can make friends easily and I just dont connect with people? Why was i made wrong?



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  (#9009 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 11th 2020, 12:26 PM

New extremely severe PTSD does not mix with chronic illness, past PTSD, grief, and full time work. Oh well, not a damn thing I can do about any of it.


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  (#9010 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 11th 2020, 03:18 PM

I fucking miss going to concerts and losing myself in music loud enough to deafen my own thoughts.



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  (#9011 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 11th 2020, 06:52 PM

I'm really not okay. At all.


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  (#9012 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 14th 2020, 01:06 PM

Panic attack in the toilet at work 20 mins into my shift. Super.



A paradox:
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  (#9013 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 14th 2020, 04:46 PM

I can't go on. There's no one who can or will help. And with the flashbacks and dissociation so bad and so frequent, I can't promise I won't kill myself sooner than planned.


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  (#9014 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 15th 2020, 05:47 AM

I can't wait until all of this is over and done with.


   
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  (#9015 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 15th 2020, 02:32 PM

I'm beyond help. No one can handle me.


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  (#9016 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 16th 2020, 12:55 AM

Urgh, I'm starting to get nervous and anxious, but I have to do it.


   
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  (#9017 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 16th 2020, 01:41 PM

It's honestly just a matter of time before I end it. Who's going to stop me? No one.


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  (#9018 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 17th 2020, 11:10 PM

I really really don't want to go to work tomorrow.



A paradox:
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are the things you need to live
.

- Matt Haig



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  (#9019 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 18th 2020, 01:09 PM

Why bother asking for help when people just "lol just be happy and do self care!" At my problems that are way too severe for that shit to make a dent in. I know cause I've been fucking trying that for years. Doesn't fucking help.


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  (#9020 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 19th 2020, 12:28 PM

Family member is dying. Or dead by now... well still gotta work full time. With all the other fucking shit.


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  (#9021 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 19th 2020, 12:32 PM

Oh yeah and a friend relapsed and overdosed the other day.


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  (#9022 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 19th 2020, 12:35 PM

What's today's trauma going to be? See this is why I need to kill myself as soon as possible.


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  (#9023 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 19th 2020, 02:44 PM

Why don't I believe in myself? What on earth happened to me so that I have very little self belief or self esteem?


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  (#9024 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 02:35 AM

I hope tomorrow never comes.


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  (#9025 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 02:41 AM

No, I won't feel better tomorrow just because another night passes. Why do people assume that? I won't fucking feel better til shit gets better.


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  (#9026 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 09:12 AM

I have a lot on my plate at the moment and I can feel the stress building up more and more.


   
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  (#9027 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 11:22 AM

I can't function, but I have to for some reason


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  (#9028 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 05:58 PM

A day wasted. Feel all over the place. I was fine yesterday, what's wrong with me today? Can't concentrate and have an ever growing to-do list.


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  (#9029 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 07:41 PM

I WISH I WAS FUCKING DEAD. I can feel the flashbacks coming back harder. So yeah, I don't know if I'll survive this.


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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 08:42 PM

It would be best for everyone if I was dead.


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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 09:33 PM

Suicide is the only way to make it stop. Everyone needs me to make it stop so I stop hurting them by being in more pain than they can handle. Well what about me?


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Re: Screaming thread. - November 20th 2020, 10:02 PM

I may not survive tonight


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Re: Screaming thread. - November 21st 2020, 01:13 PM

If I get covid, at least I'll have a good enough reason to kill myself


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  (#9034 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 21st 2020, 06:02 PM

Another colleague has resigned, with immediate effect this time. I support it and I'm proud of her, but it makes more work for me and reminds me of how desperately I need a decent job.



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Re: Screaming thread. - November 21st 2020, 11:20 PM

Well that was awkward. Who knew a game could be so uncomfortable?



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Re: Screaming thread. - November 22nd 2020, 08:00 PM

I need to get out of this job. Please let me find a job I can do. Please.



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  (#9037 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 23rd 2020, 07:27 AM

I thought it was water under the bridge, but I guess not.



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Re: Screaming thread. - November 23rd 2020, 10:18 AM

I just want all of this over and done with.


   
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Re: Screaming thread. - November 24th 2020, 03:09 AM

I don't understand you at all sometimes.



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Re: Screaming thread. - November 24th 2020, 04:47 PM

Extra bad ptsd day=extra suicidal


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