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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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PK Fire Offline
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Unhappy I dislike myself. - April 15th 2015, 01:06 PM

Everyone in my school doesn't like me. I always feel like I'm dragging behind my friends, and whenever I try to talk I always get interrupted. No one notices me or says hi, or when they do, it's an "oh, it's her." I don't get greeted with hugs or "I've missed you's". I never have anyone to hang out with on the weekends, so I have to come up with a way to spend time doing things by myself. I'm the person who always sits alone at lunch or before school, and people look at me like I'm a weirdo. I think I'm a weirdo and a freak. I try not to let it bother me but there's no way I can hide it. I'm really ugly, poorly dressed, fat, socially retarded, and I have nothing better to do than sit on my ass all day with a computer screen in front of my face. I always get excluded from everything, I never get asked out on a date or to a dance, especially prom, and no one will ever want to work on a group assignment with me. I don't know why people like my mom tell me it gets better and I would eventually be able to make friends. No, it's not true, and I won't ever make a friend who would feel comfortable talking to me. But then if I get messages from others saying they can be my friend, I always push them away because I'm not used to having friends. I think my autism is another reason why people don't want to be around me. I tried to tell my classmates during a "no hate" assembly, but they either didn't care because it was ME who said it or they don't want to acknowledge the fact that I have a disorder and they don't feel comfortable being around me. I don't know when this will end. I just really, really want to be liked.
   
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Re: I dislike myself. - April 22nd 2015, 01:20 PM

Hey,

I'm really really sorry for not replying to this earlier. I didn't see it! I just wanted to let you know that your mom is right as frustrating as that might sound. With the end of school comes new people. Whatever you choose to do you'll be surrounded by new people and hopefully you'll hit it off with some of them. School is a really toxic environment and I know how bad it can feel. Is there any after school clubs or anything you're interested in that you could join? Sometimes like minded people make friends easier. If you feel like your autism may be holding you back is there a group for young people in your area similar to you? When people are in a similar situation it'll be easier to talk to them and make friends with someone who understands.

But more than anything, I wanted to let you know you're not alone. This will pass <3



Take as long as you need.
   
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Re: I dislike myself. - April 26th 2015, 04:24 PM

You will meet new people and its their loss you seem nice and if you ever need someone to talk you can message me.
   
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Re: I dislike myself. - May 4th 2015, 05:30 AM

You sound like you're struggling a lot and part of it is others excluding you, but if you push people away it will be rather difficult to make friends with them. Maybe one thing you can do is if someone shows interest to not push that person away. Start small, it can be just one person and see how that goes when you spend time with them. This is something that will definitely take time so patience is required but making friends is a skill and I believe that you can learn that skill. It may take more time and a harder path getting there but you gotta keep trying, evaluating etc. Just try to be open because that's super important. At the same time, school is often not the best place to make friends, even for someone like me who does not have autism, I had a lot of difficulty making friends at school. But I did join clubs after school as well as extra curricular not provided by the school. Sometimes it takes someone who is not competing with you academically to actually accept you. It seems with competition and grades and such, classmates aren't the best choice. But peers who are not in your school might not be as hostile and even friendly, coming up to you. I hope things work out.
   
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