Financial problems...?

[Beth.]

So my family is extremely poor at this point. We can barely afford the internet, and tv. It was supposed to go off but my grandmother somehow found money to pay it. I'm currently broke nearly too, so I can't contribute anymore. There is no insurance on the cars anymore, it started out as a week thing but now my mom can't find any money for it.

I'm just sick of being poor. I had tons of money before college started this year. I have to pay for my food about 5-6 days of the week. I pay for my doctor visits, medicine, clothes, gas money, toll money. And yeah I know this seems like not alot but it adds up. Plus my mom, who only works a job for roughly 10 hours a week, asks to "borrow." Yet never pays me back.

My brother smokes, he's also two years older than me. Has no money saved, blows it all. And my mom gives him 7 dollars a day for cigs! Yet doesn't pay me back! Plus I get conned into him "loaning" money from me too. I cannot take all this stress over money problems anymore. Plus I'm trying to fucking move out, I'm putting away so much money every week and hopefully by next year I'll have enough to get a place with someone. It's just ridiculous. Plus my mom smokes too, and drinks heavily. The money is going in all the wrong places. And I know I'm technically an adult now, but it's so unfair. If I got 7 dollars daily I'd be fine dude. Or it would at least help me so much. I'm now starving myself to keep up and make sure I have enough money for essentials, which isn't even food anymore.

I just want to cry. I'm getting so depressed over it all. No one around me understands, they take for granted so much. All my anxiety is back and plus my birthday is coming up. Just want to crawl in a hole.

[Loving Linux Penguin]

You're not alone

I think that VERY FEW people can say they're not having financial difficulties of some sort!

[iHEAVENn]

How much money do you have saved?
If it's enough to pay your car insurance then you might want to do that. If you get pulled over without it you get a big fine, and will more than likely get put on an sr22 where you have to have it by law for 2-3 years something like that.
It's not fun.

If your mom and brother are not paying you back, then stop giving them money. If you keep giving them money freely then you're basically saying "here take it, dont pay me back cause i wont ever ask for it"

You CAN live without cable. My husband and I have lived without it for a year, and we're perfectly fine not paying a stupid bill every month for a few hours of t.v.

You can eat, you just have to make a list of non expensive items that can stretch though out the month.
Maybe write out how much money you have/make then write out what you actually NEED to live off of every month. (and no t.v./internet are not a need.. just nice to have)

[Loving Linux Penguin]

^Not having INSURANCE doesn't give you a big fine, the DMV registration does.

Then again though, you guys are in other states so forgive me if I'm missing something

[Beth.]

I know that internet and cable are obviously wants and not needs. I'm not stupid, not to be rude. I'm just saying, we can afford their beer and cigarrettes and can't afford car insurance, food, internet, and cable. Seems like a clear problem to me. Also it's a bit contradicting to me that I would pay the bill for the insurance yet don't loan them money, if that makes sense. Because I know I won't get back the car insurance money and I know my mom will think oh I don't need to pay her back like everything else.

[EightEleven91]

Not trying to be rude here.. so please, dont take it the wrong way.
If your mom thought financial difficulties were so bad she wouldnt be giving a son who smokes $7 a day. You need to sit her down and tell her that your grandmother has paid, as have you, when it could be a little bit easier if she didnt give your brother $7 everyday which actually adds up to $49 a week.. which adds up to $196 a month... which adds up to $2352 a year!! Thats a whole lot of money for a family apparently in 'financial difficulty' I am not disbelieving you for one second.

Just explain that to your mom, explain it to your grandmother, explain it all to your grandmother and if I was you, move into your grandmothers.

[Thirteen]

I know the feeling, but in a different way. I'm struggling to find work, I want to move out, I hate this useless feeling of being at home and not contributing.

Anyways, as others have said, sounds like your family has their priorities in the wrong place. Perhaps see if they can get cartons of cigarettes of the Native Reserves at least? I mean, it's much cheaper that way. Maybe about $15-$20 for the equivalent of 8 packs. I mean, it doesn't sound like much of a difference, but it really does make a HUGE difference. Thats what people do here to save on cigs. And as far as meals go, either buy in bulk, get the sale items, find cheap meals (I'm sure plenty of websites and blogs have healthy, budget-friendly ideas). Is your cable basic or premium? If its higher, downgrade. Also try that with the internet, perhaps? If you're on normal high-speed, downgrade to high-speed Lite?

Hopefully things work out for you guys.

[hopefaithlove]

Hey Beth. I can't imagine how difficult this is. Please remember that I'm still here for you and I still care, so you can always text me if you just need to get some things off your chest.

Starving yourself is not going to be a good solution to the problem though. Keep your head up if you can. Things will get better. Just keep working towards the future.

[Jacksonian]

You and your family need to enforce a strict budget. Convince them on it and if not then keep saving money for your own place because if you need money and it is there but is being misused then what else can you do except part ways with whomever is wasting it.

[Beth.]

This was mostly just a rant thread. I have tried to discuss it with my mom. She can't be strict and she doesn't see how much this is effecting me. Plus I'm jobless still, I've applied to many places with no luck thus far. But without a job she can't do much really.

[WillO'Wisp]

I understand the pain of your parents spending money on alcohol instead of something important. My dad used to drink insanely alot and spend too much money on beer every day, but he's been sober for over 2 years now, and perhaps your mother will realize how bad her drinking is and stop. If not, then you don't need to have anything to do with her and I wouldn't blame you. I know how it feels, I know how annoying drunks are and I hate being around them too, I hate alcohol, and that's why I never will and never have drank in my life.
I think you could get a couple jobs, save up money, find a friend to move in with so you won't have to deal with them anymore, and the next time your mom asks for money just flat out ask her, "How come you never pay me back but yet you can give my brother money for smokes? You won't get anymore money from me unless you start paying me back."
Stick up for yourself.