MEN, MAN UP.

[Singing to the starlight]

Honest to God. Men stop waiting for women to make the first move and GET ON WITH IT. It gets annoying.

I command all of you to go out and ask / kiss the person you're into. RIGHT NOW.
asjdfLKHASIFHKSZ

:3

[L'espoir]

I command M to ask me out immediately

[Fictional]

i wish xD

Though, what if some guy who liked you that you couldn't stand came up and kissed you... that'd suck =|

[Singing to the starlight]

Well they could just ask

[Nenya]

Lol, nice thread but, er, what's wrong with you going out and kissing the guy you're into?

[Fucking Done]

Aha most of us have tried that. Doesn't always work. :P

[Singing to the starlight]

Originally Posted by Elfy

Lol, nice thread but, er, what's wrong with you going out and kissing the guy you're into?

Cuz I'm scared

[losing touch.]

yeah i'm liking this thread..

[Goatboy]

lol the last girls I went out with asked me out - actually I regret accepting

[TheWhiteTornado]

Originally Posted by Sitting on the shitter

Cuz I'm scared

And you think we're not? The reason most guys don't is because they figure none of them are the guys you actually want this to apply to

[Shikamaru]

i dislike this thread, why do the guys have to do it, why dont you ladies go out and do it,
and if your scared, dont you think the guys would be scared too?

[Singing to the starlight]

Originally Posted by Mr.sexyface

i dislike this thread, why do the guys have to do it, why dont you ladies go out and do it,
and if your scared, dont you think the guys would be scared too?

Because you guys are guys!

All the old books say you guys should do it. So NNEHHHH

[DarkSeph]

Take your own advice (minus the male part) and then we might listen.

Seriously though, most girls don't like the guys who like them. And the majority of girls hate guys who are pushy on making moves. If we just asked straight out of the blue, we'd get labeled as "creeps" and ignored forever. Can't blame the more decent guys for being respectful and cautious. If you don't let him know how you feel, then you can't blame him for being scared too. Men are human too.

Men being "men" is old fashioned and outdated. Being scared is normal, don't worry. But you have nothing to lose by going for it. If you follow the "old books" you're only going to end up badly regretting it once your opportunity has slipped away. Face your fear and take a chance. Best of luck!

[SonicFan]

If you want to live in the 50s fine but I'd rather stick to the 21st century

Seriously though, most girls don't like the guys who like them. And the majority of girls hate guys who are pushy on making moves. If we just asked straight out of the blue, we'd get labeled as "creeps" and ignored forever. Can't blame the more decent guys for being respectful and cautious. If you don't let him know how you feel, then you can't blame him for being scared too. Men are human too.

Truth. Plus being ignored forever is only the minimal that can happen

[MadPoet]

To be honest I think this is really sexist, if guys are expected to tell girls how they feel then girls should be able to tell guys how they feel too. A lot of girls go on and on about how they want to be equal to guys, yet they expect guys to be superior and be the ones brave enough to ask someone out. If guys are always supposed to be the ones who ask the girls out, then it's fair to say guys are superior to girls. And that's not the kind of world we live in.

[Fucking Done]

Okay fine we will.
But that means you ladies will have to get back in the kitchen :P

[Singing to the starlight]

Ahaha.

We're all scared. But I'm just ranting, because you guys always suck.
You don't have to be all creepy about it. A simple 'I like you' will suffice.

[Shikamaru]

Originally Posted by Low Budget

Okay fine we will.
But that means you ladies will have to get back in the kitchen :P

love this, i totally agree

[Shikamaru]

Originally Posted by Sitting on the shitter

Ahaha.

We're all scared. But I'm just ranting, because you guys always suck.
You don't have to be all creepy about it. A simple 'I like you' will suffice.

most girls will have the reaction of the guy being a creep if they said that,
really i have hung out with plenty of girls to know this, :P
still if you want a guy to ask you out show him signs you like him, maybe flirt with him or something

[Hallelujah]

Life would be so much simpler if someone designed a gadgety gizmo that tells you when someone like you. Problem solved

[Singing to the starlight]

Originally Posted by I-am-not-a-robot

Life would be so much simpler if someone designed a gadgety gizmo that tells you when someone like you. Problem solved

THIS.

[Hollifire]

Hahaha totally agree! Either way, girls AND guys should just tell each other how they feel, regardless of the situation. And if you like someone, go and ask them out, kiss them, hug them, do something to show that you like them because they could like you too. [:

[TheWhiteTornado]

Originally Posted by Sitting on the shitter

Ahaha.

We're all scared. But I'm just ranting, because you guys always suck.
You don't have to be all creepy about it. A simple 'I like you' will suffice.

You have to realize though that if it was any guy other than the ones you have in mind that you'll still dislike it and be awkward around them or you'll separate yourself from them.

[ThePunkAlien]

I'm glad I don't live in the fifties. "Man up"? Guys are just as anxious and scared as girls are, guys can get hurt too. We're not Supermen. We can't do everything. We can't whisk you off your feet because then chances are you'll shoot us down and yet you expect all of us to keep doing this -

Girls should try going through countless rejections and getting few acceptances which only might work out - then report back.

[Geb12596]

Hello its called chivalry! But I don't tend to kiss guys or girls I like.... I start by asking if they are gay and then punching them and being like your cute i like you and running away. So if someone does that chase them down and kiss them guys/ ballsy girls :P

[Geb12596]

Originally Posted by ThePunkAlien

I'm glad I don't live in the fifties. "Man up"? Guys are just as anxious and scared as girls are, guys can get hurt too. We're not Supermen. We can't do everything. We can't whisk you off your feet because then chances are you'll shoot us down and yet you expect all of us to keep doing this -

Girls should try going through countless rejections and getting few acceptances which only might work out - then report back.

Do you think that girls DON'T go through that?

[Hollifire]

Originally Posted by ThePunkAlien

I'm glad I don't live in the fifties. "Man up"? Guys are just as anxious and scared as girls are, guys can get hurt too. We're not Supermen. We can't do everything. We can't whisk you off your feet because then chances are you'll shoot us down and yet you expect all of us to keep doing this -

Girls should try going through countless rejections and getting few acceptances which only might work out - then report back.

Girls get rejected by guys JUST as much as guys get rejected by girls. There's no one sex that has it worse off. We all have feelings, we all get hurt, we all need to man up, so to say. It's a waste of time to sit here and complain about who has it worse off, when we all could just be a little more considerate with people's feelings. So, everyone step back from here, and take a breath. There shouldn't be any arguing going on, or being insensitive to what people are saying.

With that being said, if any guys got offended, have a hug.
Same with if any girls got offended.

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

LMAO I love this thread. I have been having the same feeling.

Or, what about when you know a guy is into you but he is too shy to ask and then he goes with the safer bet. The girl that he knows likes him. The girl that doesn't pose a challenge. Ugh it is so annoying!!!

I guess sometimes us girls have to be the one to take initiative but what if we do and it isn't enough? Shouldn't guys have to work a little too?

[TheWhiteTornado]

Originally Posted by ~CourageousSurvivor~

I guess sometimes us girls have to be the one to take initiative but what if we do and it isn't enough? Shouldn't guys have to work a little too?

Why shouldn't it be? And don't you think this is what guys think all the time?

And some obvious interest is really all that's needed in return if you don't want to take any action. Some guys have learned from experience that it's not worth it to go for a girl that they're not sure is interested just because they know it'll result in awkwardness.

[off to a new life]

I don't know. There are still a lot of guys who get intimidated or turned off by a girl who makes the first move. It's pathetic, but guys still feel the need to be 'manly'.

[Brandon]

I'll be honest, this is a slightly ignorant thread. I understand your feelings. Guys should take more initiative like they did back in the day. But we don't live in easy times, people. Women stand up for themselves more than they did back in the day. Women are starting to take initiative. The older we get, the more relationships we've potentially been through. And if you've been through a relationship or friendship that went wrong, we learn about our mistakes so they won't happen again. We have defense mechanisms that help us battle the day-to-day world. Asking a man/woman is no easy task because you're going against the stream and you're letting that person RIGHT through your defense mechanisms. You're taking a risk because we're not always sure of what the other person is going to say. Those types of situations make you vulnerable -- and no one likes to be in a vulnerable situation. Men and women have their differences, but we are all still human beings. Because we are human beings, we share some things in common -- in this case, men can be afraid of asking another person out too. Telling a man to man up in 2010 is not the same thing as telling a man to man up during WWII. Society has changed, generations have changed...people have changed. So quite honestly, it's not him or her that should man up, it's whoever wants to take initiative so you can finally move on with your life and stop complaining.

[Katieeee]

Question:
My mom always said not to tell a boy you like them because it makes the boy feel super awkward/makes you just look clingy and desperate.

So guys, is this true? You say you want us to come up and ask, but from my experience it makes the guy really really uncomfortable when they don't share the same feelings while also making them feel emasculated because it's "their duty to ask out the girl". (:

[michaell]

yea i always make the first move, way to early and without warning, hasnt worked. i believe men should make the first move only if the woman acts interested and i she doenst act interested SHE ISNT interested

and besides kissing the girl i like wont go over to well, there might be negative consequences to my reputation

if girls didnt gossip so much about the guys who ask them out then id be less afraid, but since i have girls gossip about guys who asked them out ( they are all like "eww HE asked you out, i dont like him, hes creepy". im not as afraid of rejection as i am of the stupid pointless gossip girls do. guys dont do that gossip

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

Originally Posted by Katieeee

Question:
My mom always said not to tell a boy you like them because it makes the boy feel super awkward/makes you just look clingy and desperate.

So guys, is this true? You say you want us to come up and ask, but from my experience it makes the guy really really uncomfortable when they don't share the same feelings while also making them feel emasculated because it's "their duty to ask out the girl". (:

I think it depends on the guy. There are going to be some guys that aren't going to be all that into having the girl take initiative and then there are going to be some who will be fine with it.

Talking to friends I have learned a few things (although I have never applied them to myself; I just watched others apply it to their lives):

1) Taking intiative doesn't have to mean asking 'Hey let's get something to eat sometime'. It could be as simple as going up to a person you are interested and starting a conversation. When you see the person of interest you can say Hi and try to engage them ask how their day has gone etc. Let them know that you want to get to know them. They might take the next step.

2) Asking a guy to have a cup of coffee someday isn't necessarily a come on. If you see some guy you know, maybe you had a class together or something, and you want to get to know him simply asking to get coffee doesn't have to insinuate that you want to date him. Asking for coffee could mean you want to build a friendship, you need more help on the homework assignment. If you don't act awkward about it then it won't seem awkward to the other person.

[Nomophobia]

Good thread, I totally agree with you...they do need to ask first tho! XXXX

[DarkSeph]

Both micheal and katie make good points. I think in the end it boils down to personality and you need to compensate for that. Expecting either gender to have more or less responsibility in the matter is being a little sexist and kinda goes against the whole modern equality between genders.

Some guys are going to love chasing after girls and love making the first move. It gives them a sense of "achievement". Other guys don't care either way. And some guys would actually find it degrading to being doing all the chasing and would expect if someone really liked them they'd show equal effort.

Personally I think some girls feel that they they deserve to be chased and feel the guy has to put in the effort to be "worthy" of being with them. It makes them feel desirable, loved and wanted to have guys fighting for their affections.
Some girls can just be shy though, in which case it actually would be nice for the guy to help them out and take initiative.

Aaaaand... I think the thread was merely a rant because someone the OP liked was being slow to make a move and we've blown it a little out of proportion.

[TheBabyEater]

To be honest I have to agree with the guys on this one

But they don't seem to realize that Hannah is totally kidding. And everyone's taking things way too seriously considering this is the "Why Me" forums and Hannah's totally ranting here. lol I love you Hannah. Can't wait to have you back in chat soon

[Lightning]

Originally Posted by TheBabyEater

To be honest I have to agree with the guys on this one

But they don't seem to realize that Hannah is totally kidding. And everyone's taking things way too seriously considering this is the "Why Me" forums and Hannah's totally ranting here. lol I love you Hannah. Can't wait to have you back in chat soon

The internet is srs bsn.
I knew it was a joke the first I read it. Everyone is treating it like a debate of some sort. : (

And Hannah = funny~! end of for me.

[TheBabyEater]

Hannah = Epicly Amazing.

[Invert]

I think some people have taken this thread a tad to seriously Forgive me if I'm wrong, but it seems to OP is just venting about how she likes some guy and she wishes he'd ask her out as she's scared. If the topic was 'Just ask me out already. Those who like someone go tell them right now', people probably would have been more sympathetic... I think the man stuff is tongue in cheek to an extent

I'm not saying girls shouldnt guys out, I've encouraged some girls too, and as someone surrounded by gay people, I can safelty say its not just about if boys or girls should ask first, just no one seems to want to Rejection IS scary, but if you never try, you may miss something, if they are doing the same, so sometimes, you gotta take a risk. When it doesnt work out, it sucks, but when it does, it's so worth it

I happen to be one of those people who likes to tell myself I'll let the other person go first, but I'm useless, and end up flirting and basically admitting to liking them, totally without meaning too 0: )

On a side note about boys and girls though. Yeah saying the man should is technically sexist, and ideally it shouldn't matter, but some men, due to their own conformity to sexist gender roles can actually feel offended if a girl they like asks them out, so make sure to know how manly the guy likes to think he is first