My family. I'm done. Time for a change of address.

[PointeStarr]

Today I left my phone unattended on the kitchen table for about a minute to go switch laundry loads. I came back to find that my dog Kele, had successfully chewed through the motherboard of my phone. As much as I love getting new phones... #sarcasm I had no issue going to Wireless toys and spending 20 bucks and getting some cheap refurbished dark ages phone until I could get a replacement with my insurance money. My mother had an issue with this. and blew 100 bucks on a used phone which is the same as the one I had, just black instead of blue.

The part that bugged me is the fact that the following happened
I said "bad girl" to my dog as i was removing my phone from her mouth. I got yelled at for being disrespectful to the dog
I was informed that I was spoiled in college because I thought it was okay to leave my phone in my coat pocket on the table for a minute to go switch laundry loads
I was also told that this is the dogs house, not mine, we work everything around them and if I dont like it I can leave.

I love my dogs and all like seriously I do love animals, but I would never ever ever tell my future kid that the dogs are more important then her/him and if they dont like it move out.

Last year I got yelled at a few times at work because I walked out of my house in my uniform and got covered in dog hair, even though the dogs were outside and i had just vacuumed. I got written up for it too.
If I want to go out and look nice or go to work, I have to shower, put on pajamas or sweats, get ready and then put my clothes in a meijer bag go get in the car and change on the way there or when I get there. Or I'm covered in dog hair.

My room gets really warm/cold depending on if the heat or AC is on, for whatever reason my room has 2 vents that blow in, my room is a very comfertable temperature if my door is open, however I cant do that unless I baracade my doorway so the dogs cant get in because otherwise they steal and destroy my stuff that is on my dresser or book shelfs and if i baracade my doorway so they cant get in and they try to jump it and get hurt, I get yelled at.

Right now I am sitting in my room with the door closed. I just went downstairs, because nobody else is in the house the two female danes tore every cushion off of both sofas and tore the table cloth off the kitchen table.
I cant do anything in my room without them destroying the rest of the house, this whole last week I've been trying to get my room finished because my mom converted it to a storage room, but I was only able to work on getting my bedroom back when my dad was here and could take them to the garage, because I get yelled at for not watching the damn dogs and them being destructive.

Oh and because Vickie (mom) chose to pay for a newish phone for me instead of letting me get a replacement one for maybe a week before I got a shinny brand new one. we are now leaving monday instead of tomorrow, she has a blood clot in her one leg from ankle to hip solid threw one vein and she cant handle long trips in cars so she was going to drive there staying in a hotel sunday night and leave monday after I could get back in my dorm, she used the hotel money to buy my phone, not that I'm complaining cuz I honestly dont want to go back or be stuck in a room all night with her. but the fact that she is yelling at me about how much pain she will be in because of having to drive there and back in one day instead of spreading it over 2 is wrong. I didnt ask her to pay for anything for me I just asked for her to give me a ride to wireless toys.

And then she called me a spoiled rotten bitch for leaving my phone on the table, in my coat pocket. claimed that I do nothing with my life except fuck and drink. I'm going no where. and in 5 years I'm going to be wishing for her life because I'm going to move out and not have time for a life and end up knocked up with ugly bastard children and Brian will walk out on me and fuck my credit over on where ever we are staying and I will end up getting my ugly bastard children taken away by the state as I'm living in a homeless shelter or rehab.
Seriously? yes I drink yes I have sex, I even smoke, But I have a job, I'm a full time college student and I almost have a 3.0 at one of the best colleges in the midwest, studying to be a social worker. And got accepted into a volunteer abroad program to go learn Russian while working with Orphans in Russia. yup I'm doing nothing with my life. Nothing at all.

I am so fed up with my living arrangement and I think 5-8 months is to long to go before I can move out. I'm thinking when I come home in January after my friend Sadie's wedding I am just gonna go box everything up put it in a storage unit and couch hop until I can move in with my boyfriend (who is technically my fiancee but he wont make it official until he asks my dads permission and gives me a legit ring) and just get a Post Office box or ask one of my friends if I can forward my mail to their place. And I swear to God. if/when I end up pregnant. She will not be at my baby shower, she is not going with me to the hospital, I am blocking her from seeing any pictures on facebook. She will see my ugly bastard children once maybe twice a year and get an updated photo at Christmas. I am seriously thinking when my address changes I need to cut ties with my mother at the same time.

I understand that my parents are awesome and will pay my phone and car insurance as long as I'm in school and living at home, I can live here for free. However I dont think Financial heaven is worth emotional hell. And I really just want out.

[Katrina]

Congratulations on being accepted to the volunteer abroad program in Russia. I've heard so many marvelous things about volunteer/study abroad programs, and I just loved getting out the country the one time that I was able to do so. I hope you will seriously consider doing this - it sounds like you will have an incredible time.

That does seem like its a lot of emotional strain for you, though, Samantha Noel. The communication issues with your mother sound like they're very difficult to deal with, and I'm wondering what might happen if you try to maintain an open line of communication with her? Not saying that you have to go all up out of your way, but I am often very surprised at what people will do when we reach out to them. I feel like she's probably going through some emotional difficulties of her own, and while that's certainly no reason to say some of the things she's said to you, I guess that could at least explain, at least partially, why its happening?

And yeah, the whole dog thing just sounds incredibly irritating. I so don't like dog hair... it frustrates me to no end. At any rate, Samantha Noel, I hope that things work out for you and that you're able to smooth over these issues with your mother. One last thing I want to ask: have you guys ever thought about family counseling? If you live in the United States, your area should have some low-cost counseling centers designed for families dealing with hardships, and I think you and your mom could really benefit from this.

Best of luck with everything.

[PointeStarr]

My dad and I have both tried to get my mom to go to counciling, she refuses.
My mom isnt very communicative, schitzophrenia is pretty heavy in our family, and I'm pretty sure she has it, which I think is why she doesnt want to go to family counciling because they could tell her that something is wrong with her, and she seems to like her delusion of everything being okay.

So I think it may be easier to just move out, she does better when I'm not around. I have bipolar disorder and I think that may have a part in why we dont get along, like maybe my disorder is interferring with hers or something Idk.

[leavemealone]

Usually I would disagree about moving away from the problem, instead of fixing it, but with the situation you are in, I think its an exception. You are an adult now, you can make your own decisions, and if moving will allow you to focus on yourself instead of getting yelled at for stupid things on a daily basis, then I say go ahead. Good for you! Its going to be hard to provide for yourself, but if you really try, I believe that you can do it. Your mother has some serious issues that she needs to address. She cannot keep treating you like a child. And as for your father? He needs to step up and stop acting like your mother is doing nothing wrong.

And instead of getting two destructive dogs, how about next time they get a nice golden retriever? Obviously your parents aren't responsible enough to handle it. And if you have to babysit your dogs, that's the first sign that they need to be taught some manners and discipline. Your mom has to remember that they are wild animals, and they have a mind of their own. They make their own decisions, and if she cant handle that, she shouldn't have a dog, let alone two. Also, getting mad at you for saying "bad girl"? I don't understand. The dog ruined your cell phone, that was in your coat pocket, on a table. That is NOT your fault, that is the dogs fault, and she deserved a scolding. If someone doesn't yell at the dog every once in a while, they're going to think that its okay to act like this.

Do whatever you have to do to get out of that house. Its going to be better for you in the end, and if you choose to restrict communication with your mother, that is your decision. But I think that the problem is that you two just need some space and time to think. I'm sure that things will work out for you in the end good luck, stay strong!

[PointeStarr]

She has more then 2 dogs, she has 4 and runs a rescue shelter and is going to start breeding soon out of our house. I go home on friday and if things arent different I'm going to box up everything and move it to my friends house until I get back from college in may and me and my boyfriend can get an apartment.

[softball]

If you feel it's time to move out, then I think you should. The dogs are obviously a huge part of your life and in a lot of ways, it's hurting your career and relationships. Hope you figure out what to do xx