Triggering: if you really knew me

[JollyRancher.]

If you really knew me, you would know

That behind my smile, i am crying
That im actually dying from inside out
That i may have a serious brain problem
That ive almost died more than 6 times each year
That im insecure with everything i do
That im really smart but dont want to be called a nerd
That i tend to tense up when a guy i dont know gets behind me
That i love Valentine's day but i hate being single
That I sit for hours staring out my window waiting to be saved
That I have given up on living yet im still here
That i used to cut myself
That as days pass by my heart grows darker
That i cry endlessly for the stupid reasons
That everyday i fear stepping out of the house
That i try to be happy so nobody sees my pain
That i fear the only people i love will dissappear in front of my face
That i hate to eat, yet i stuff myself to not worry people
That I'm falling deeper in my depression
That i always want to leave the places i go little brighter
That i wear loose clothing to hide my body
That when i look into the mirror all i se is an ugly girl
That i wont get any taller than i already am
That i have a mother who still dresses me up
That I envy my sisters because they are pretty
That i tend to run away crying from my problems
That my singing is the only good thing about me, in my opinion
That i spend hours infront of the mirror telling myself everything i can change
That i hate being alone
That i love to stand out but fear what people think
That im terrible at getting dressed
That i hide inside my sweaters
That everytime i heard the police, i think their coming for me
That i act all miss. Goody- two- shoes around adults
That i spend hours in a corner of a room
That when i sing, i only sing songs that remind me of me
That i put myself down all the time
That im just a little girl that loves fluffy cute things
That ive never gotten anything for Valentine's day
That i stopped believing in what people say
That when i see someone angry i think their after me
That i hate my cousins on my father side because they think their all that
That im so smart, schools all over America sent me an application when i was going into highschool
That everyday i come home to a very sick mother
That i walk up a hill to go to a church, but chicken out and ask for forgiveness outside
That i get an adreline rush when i ride my bike down a hill on a very busy road
That i dont spend enough time with friends, so we start to grow apart

If you really knew me, you would know a lot more than this

[Dez]

So what makes you you?

[Colored Shadows]

Hey Daisy!

I've moved your thread to the Chit-Chat forum as I think it is better suited there.

Take care!