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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 03:45 AM

Now this is just sad, absolutely appalling how things could get this way:
http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/...1066a80d640a2c
http://www.parentdish.com/2010/10/28...wbbbab00000002
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 03:54 AM

Are you kidding me...?
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 04:02 AM

They might as well say dump the disabled child at a dumpster or junk yard that's far away from home.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 06:19 AM

That is retarded NO ONE deserves to be dumped like an unwanted animal


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 08:48 AM

That's disgusting


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 05:29 PM

That is so ridiculous!!! As a person who plans to work with people with NLD and Asperger's, I say that dumping disabled kids in homeless shelters is not the right thing to do. If they do that, the person would not get the help they need. What about disability insurance or something like that? This makes me so mad!
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 06:00 PM

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That's disgusting
Seconded.

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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 10th 2010, 06:19 PM

Hmm. I read it and it actually said that they recommend that if a disabled person CANNOT be cared for at home, then it may be wise to put them in a shelter. Disgusting, but not quite as bad as I originally thought.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 11th 2010, 04:22 AM

This is unsettling. Dumping kids with physical or mental disabilities is not wrong. It's deplorable.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 11th 2010, 04:43 AM

If I had a messed up kid I would dump them at one of these without a second thought, I wouldn't want them.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 11th 2010, 05:50 AM

I could never do that to my child, I mean they are your kids with your blood I'll do everything in my power to provide the best life possible to them not just give up and dump them in a homeless shelter.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 11th 2010, 06:38 AM

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If I had a messed up kid I would dump them at one of these without a second thought, I wouldn't want them.
Harsh as it sounds, I don't think I could raise a disabled child. THe things he'd be missing out on are the things I would enjoy about raising a child.. I guess I'd have to think about it when it actually happens, but I think I'd keep adoption an open route..
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 11th 2010, 05:40 PM

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If I had a messed up kid I would dump them at one of these without a second thought, I wouldn't want them.
umumumumum...no... Having BEEN in a homeless shelter, I can tell you that even being mentally healthy (for the most part... even I admit that I'm a bit frazzled around the edges ) It is a terrifying, unsettling, and horrific experience. Also, the homeless shelter workers are usually out numbered 100:1, so they have no time to attempt to deal with disabled children throwing a tantrum or being confused and scared. They are able to provide you a mat, a sandwich, a bathroom/shower, possible clean clothes, and get you to the hospital if good old fasion aspirin and dirt rubbing can't fix it. They do NOT have the facilities to deal with someone with special needs. Dumping a disabled child at a homeless shelter is tantamount to neglect and child endangerment.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 11th 2010, 05:48 PM

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Originally Posted by Kyeto-X View Post
umumumumum...no... Having BEEN in a homeless shelter, I can tell you that even being mentally healthy (for the most part... even I admit that I'm a bit frazzled around the edges ) It is a terrifying, unsettling, and horrific experience. Also, the homeless shelter workers are usually out numbered 100:1, so they have no time to attempt to deal with disabled children throwing a tantrum or being confused and scared. They are able to provide you a mat, a sandwich, a bathroom/shower, possible clean clothes, and get you to the hospital if good old fasion aspirin and dirt rubbing can't fix it. They do NOT have the facilities to deal with someone with special needs. Dumping a disabled child at a homeless shelter is tantamount to neglect and child endangerment.

I totally agree with this statement.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 02:57 AM

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If I had a messed up kid I would dump them at one of these without a second thought, I wouldn't want them.
Harsh as this is .. yeah. Pretty much.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 04:30 AM

Disgusting...how dare they?
They're humans too...maybe they should figure something out and work with the budget cuts.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 04:40 AM

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Disgusting...how dare they?
They're humans too...maybe they should figure something out and work with the budget cuts.
I never said they weren't human, they're just humans I don't want to deal with keeping.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 03:40 PM

I find it interesting that it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid...

I think it's horrible, and something I would never ever do.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 03:59 PM

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If I had a messed up kid I would dump them at one of these without a second thought, I wouldn't want them.
I don't understand how you can refer to a disabled kid as "messed up". That's really harsh. If you have children aren't you prepared to care for it no matter what? I don't think it's right to just opt out of it like that.

Having read the article, I appreciate that caring for someone with a disability can be challenging, but I can't believe that sort of "solution" was recommended. That's just so shocking.




   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 04:10 PM

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I find it interesting that it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid..
i didn't quite find it interesting, but it has caused me to lose a little faith in my fellows of the male gender.

i know caring for a mentally or physically challenged child would be difficult, but if i ever decided to have a child, i would take whatever i was dealt and hope to be the best father i could be.

.....not that that's likely anyway, cuz i don't really want kids.

the articles disgusted me, though. it's terrible that there are people out there who would actually consider something like this
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 04:26 PM

Okay, I think I might have misunderstood a little bit. If my child was born without the ability to walk, I'd still raise him. Same with if he was blind or deaf. I would still take care of that child.

My thing is that I can not raise a mentally handicapped child. I can not. I will not throw away my entire life to care for a child that can't participate in society past a reasonable age. If my kid would shove scissors down his throat at 12 .. I'm not dealing with that.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 05:45 PM

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I find it interesting that it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid...

I think it's horrible, and something I would never ever do.
OF COURSE, THAT'S THE ANSWER! THEY'RE MEN, THAT EXPLAINS WHY TWO PEOPLE ARE SAYING THEY MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO RAISE A DISABLED CHILD!!

Please, refrain from posting sexism like that.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 08:42 PM

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OF COURSE, THAT'S THE ANSWER! THEY'RE MEN, THAT EXPLAINS WHY TWO PEOPLE ARE SAYING THEY MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO RAISE A DISABLED CHILD!!

Please, refrain from posting sexism like that.
Yeah, that is pretty sexist. Especially because I happen to agree with them. I'm not proud of this, but I hate, hate, hate to be around the severely mentally handicapped. They invade my personal space and try to touch me (and their hands are always wet .. ugh ...)
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 09:37 PM

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Yeah, that is pretty sexist. Especially because I happen to agree with them. I'm not proud of this, but I hate, hate, hate to be around the severely mentally handicapped. They invade my personal space and try to touch me (and their hands are always wet .. ugh ...)
ditto nicer said then i could say it...
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 09:46 PM

I'm sorry if I'm not a totally perfect human being that doesn't conform to your image of an ideal person. I'm sorry that I do not feel like I would want to, or be able to, look after a mentally disabled child for the rest of mine and his/her life. I'm not saying I'd go "What, our child has a mental problem? TO THE STREETS WITH YOU!" but I don't think I'd be able to look after it.

I stand by what I said earlier, that what you said is incredibly sexist, and is another example of exactly how people have been turned against fathers these days.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 09:55 PM

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I'm sorry if I'm not a totally perfect human being that doesn't conform to your image of an ideal person. I'm sorry that I do not feel like I would want to, or be able to, look after a mentally disabled child for the rest of mine and his/her life. I'm not saying I'd go "What, our child has a mental problem? TO THE STREETS WITH YOU!" but I don't think I'd be able to look after it.

I stand by what I said earlier, that what you said is incredibly sexist, and is another example of exactly how people have been turned against fathers these days.
She didn't say anything sexist at all. She stated a fact. At the time she posted, the only people in this thread who had said they would not want or try to care for a child with a mental disability were male. Statistics are not sexist.

At the moment, I can't imagine what it would be like to raise a disabled child. But if I were to have one, I'm sure I would do everything possible to help them and care for them. I just don't understand why anyone would feel it was appropriate to tell a parent to give up their child like that. It's basically the same as telling them to just dump them on the side of the road. It's ridiculous.



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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 10:16 PM

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She didn't say anything sexist at all. She stated a fact. At the time she posted, the only people in this thread who had said they would not want or try to care for a child with a mental disability were male. Statistics are not sexist.
It was blatantly sexist and two people have already agreed with me. It was an insanely obvious insinuation that, of course, only males could do such a horrible thing to their own flesh and blood. So please, do not even attempt to say that it was not sexist, when it so obviously is.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 10:35 PM

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It was blatantly sexist and two people have already agreed with me. It was an insanely obvious insinuation that, of course, only males could do such a horrible thing to their own flesh and blood. So please, do not even attempt to say that it was not sexist, when it so obviously is.
People agreeing with you doesn't automatically make you right. Had she said something like "of course, only men would dump their children" or "oh, what a surprise, only men are saying that", I would agree that it was sexist. She didn't. She said the only people here who had posted and agreed with leaving the children at homeless shelters were men. Are you denying that that simple fact is true (or at least was before)?

Please stop taking every post when someone says something that might possibly be against a man and turning into a huge thing about how women are so sexist. Not everyone is against men, but twisting people's words to make them against men and then being sarcastic isn't helping your case at all.



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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 10:37 PM

o shit wrong thread

Last edited by The ANTI-Troll; November 12th 2010 at 10:38 PM. Reason: nevermind wrong window with wrong thread
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 10:41 PM

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People agreeing with you doesn't automatically make you right. Had she said something like "of course, only men would dump their children" or "oh, what a surprise, only men are saying that", I would agree that it was sexist. She didn't. She said the only people here who had posted and agreed with leaving the children at homeless shelters were men. Are you denying that that simple fact is true (or at least was before)?

Please stop taking every post when someone says something that might possibly be against a man and turning into a huge thing about how women are so sexist. Not everyone is against men, but twisting people's words to make them against men and then being sarcastic isn't helping your case at all.
I'm not twisting anyone's words. I'm simply saying what I feel from it. I do not deny the simple statistic, except that one girl has agreed as well since, making it 2:1.
The feeling I got from the post was that she felt unsurprised that two MALES felt no compassion for their flesh and blood. That was simply the impression I got from her post. And actually, she's wrong. Neither of us agreed with leaving disabled children at homeless shelters.

It was simply the wording of it. From the simple 'I find it interesting" that "it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid". Just everything about the sentence screamed sexism to me, and I'm absolutely not going to hold back in calling people out on it. That works both ways, in that I will call out people on being sexist towards women.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 10:46 PM

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Originally Posted by ShimmeringFaerie View Post


People agreeing with you doesn't automatically make you right. Had she said something like "of course, only men would dump their children" or "oh, what a surprise, only men are saying that", I would agree that it was sexist. She didn't. She said the only people here who had posted and agreed with leaving the children at homeless shelters were men. Are you denying that that simple fact is true (or at least was before)?

Please stop taking every post when someone says something that might possibly be against a man and turning into a huge thing about how women are so sexist. Not everyone is against men, but twisting people's words to make them against men and then being sarcastic isn't helping your case at all.
But it was the intent behind the fact that she stated. It's really not all that different from saying 'i find it odd that only Asians would ____________' or something like that. It's still sexist.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 11:48 PM

I thought they were referring to OLDER children, in their like, 20s.



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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 12th 2010, 11:53 PM

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I'm not twisting anyone's words. I'm simply saying what I feel from it. I do not deny the simple statistic, except that one girl has agreed as well since, making it 2:1.
The feeling I got from the post was that she felt unsurprised that two MALES felt no compassion for their flesh and blood. That was simply the impression I got from her post. And actually, she's wrong. Neither of us agreed with leaving disabled children at homeless shelters.

It was simply the wording of it. From the simple 'I find it interesting" that "it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid". Just everything about the sentence screamed sexism to me, and I'm absolutely not going to hold back in calling people out on it. That works both ways, in that I will call out people on being sexist towards women.
"I find it interesting that it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid..."
Seriously? sexism?
I must live in a different planet because I fail to see where the sexism is. The simple fact that she stated that she found something interesting based on the people that had responded was not sexism; I was actually just thinking the same before she posted it. It's like if someone posted a thread saying "Who wants to get married?" and two girls responded YES and one guy responded NO. I find it interesting that it's only girls saying they'd get married... WHAT!?!?! SEXISM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OF COURSE, THAT'S THE ANSWER! THEY'RE WOMEN, THAT EXPLAINS WHY TWO PEOPLE ARE SAYING THEY WANT TO GET MARRIED!!
I think you over reacted to the post.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 13th 2010, 06:57 AM

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Originally Posted by México View Post


"I find it interesting that it's only guys saying they'd dump the kid..."
Seriously? sexism?
I must live in a different planet because I fail to see where the sexism is. The simple fact that she stated that she found something interesting based on the people that had responded was not sexism; I was actually just thinking the same before she posted it. It's like if someone posted a thread saying "Who wants to get married?" and two girls responded YES and one guy responded NO. I find it interesting that it's only girls saying they'd get married... WHAT!?!?! SEXISM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OF COURSE, THAT'S THE ANSWER! THEY'RE WOMEN, THAT EXPLAINS WHY TWO PEOPLE ARE SAYING THEY WANT TO GET MARRIED!!
I think you over reacted to the post.
Maybe you didn't catch the insinuations in the post. It wasn't necesarrily that they explicitly said "Men are crap parents.", it was more that she was inferring that she wasn't surprised that only men said they'd dump the kid. The reverse doesn't work by the way.
And it's not as if I'm imagining things. Two other people have already agreed that she was hinting at sexism.

Saying that it's a simple fact doesn't in itself invalidate my arguments. If I was to say "Are you a whore? What, it's just a question!" Sure, it's just a question, but at the same time you can see some (not mine lol) personal opinion there, and you'd likely get insulted by it.

Last edited by forfrosne; November 13th 2010 at 07:05 AM.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 13th 2010, 07:50 AM

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Originally Posted by Matthew View Post

Maybe you didn't catch the insinuations in the post. It wasn't necesarrily that they explicitly said "Men are crap parents.", it was more that she was inferring that she wasn't surprised that only men said they'd dump the kid. The reverse doesn't work by the way.
And it's not as if I'm imagining things. Two other people have already agreed that she was hinting at sexism.
Yes and two other people had already said that she wasn't hinting sexism. She said she found it interesting that two men had said that. The same way that I find it interesting that not too many women will leave their children in a homeless shelter (now don't take that as a sexism comment) I just find it interesting I'm not hating on the male sex nor am I favoring the female sex.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Matthew View Post
Saying that it's a simple fact doesn't in itself invalidate my arguments. If I was to say "Are you a whore? What, it's just a question!" Sure, it's just a question, but at the same time you can see some (not mine lol) personal opinion there, and you'd likely get insulted by it.
You would be surprise to know that I actually don't find that offensive the simple fact that you asked that question MIGHT raise a little concern as to why you are asking it but then again I don’t have a problem with that because I know for a fact I’m not a whore. The same question goes to you “Are you a manwhore?” It’s just a simple question don’t take everything a person on the internet says personal. I do think you went overboard with her response.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 13th 2010, 07:13 PM

^there's no sexism there. She was stating a fact, and she merely said she found it interesting. People are readin waay too much into things. Complaining about sexism for such little comments is stupid.
It's terrible that people are willing to drop off their children somewhere just because they're handicapped. The mentally handicapped are still people and if you can't handle being around them it's your problem. And if you don't want a handicapped child, you shouldn't take the chance in having a child. -.-
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 14th 2010, 02:08 AM

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^there's no sexism there. She was stating a fact, and she merely said she found it interesting. People are readin waay too much into things. Complaining about sexism for such little comments is stupid.
It's terrible that people are willing to drop off their children somewhere just because they're handicapped. The mentally handicapped are still people and if you can't handle being around them it's your problem. And if you don't want a handicapped child, you shouldn't take the chance in having a child. -.-
That's not fair.

I want kids. I also want kids able to take care of themselves when they're older. Why on Earth should I not get pregnant? That's my own personal decision, and so is my decision to keep the child. It's ridiculous and offensive that you think it's okay to tell me what to do with my future and my uterus.
   
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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 14th 2010, 03:36 AM

That is terrible. I can't believe this.


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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 14th 2010, 04:00 AM

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That's not fair.

I want kids. I also want kids able to take care of themselves when they're older. Why on Earth should I not get pregnant? That's my own personal decision, and so is my decision to keep the child. It's ridiculous and offensive that you think it's okay to tell me what to do with my future and my uterus.
Well, maybe think of it from a different perspective. Would you think it was okay for people to get rid of their children if they weren't the gender that they wanted? Some people leave baby girls by the side of the road because they don't want a girl, would you think that was okay? Is it okay to not keep a child because they don't have a certain hair or eye colour?

I personally think it's ridiculous and awful that someone would get rid of a child just because they don't fit their idea of "normal" or because raising them might be more difficult than raising another child. I don't see how that is fair. How would you feel about being dumped at a homeless shelter because someone decided you were too difficult to care for?



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Re: Parents Told To Dump Disabled Kids In Homeless Shelters - November 14th 2010, 09:17 AM

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Well, maybe think of it from a different perspective. Would you think it was okay for people to get rid of their children if they weren't the gender that they wanted? Some people leave baby girls by the side of the road because they don't want a girl, would you think that was okay?
No because there is nothing physically/mentally wrong with being a girl.

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Originally Posted by ShimmeringFaerie View Post

Is it okay to not keep a child because they don't have a certain hair or eye colour?
Sure, I want a kid that looks like me and fits in to my society.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ShimmeringFaerie View Post

I personally think it's ridiculous and awful that someone would get rid of a child just because they don't fit their idea of "normal" or because raising them might be more difficult than raising another child. I don't see how that is fair.
Because, it would not have a loving environment at home at all for one, if I am willing to leave it in a ditch, do you really think I am going to care about it? No of course not, it's a pain, and a waste of Oxygen/resources to keep it alive. If it can't function as a useful member of society, due to not being naturally correct, then we should get rid of it.


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