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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
CausticTears Offline
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Arrow Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 05:44 AM

Firstly, I'm working on overcoming my dependency issues. I have always felt that when I am single, I am worthless and severely depressed and unable to be happy. So I'm trying to learn that I can stand on my own two feet and not need anyone else to fulfill what I can supply for myself.

Do you agree with what I just said? Can we be able to live comfortably and happily by ourselves? Are we able to supply what we need and want without anyone else?

I believe we can biologically. We don't NEED anyone else but our own self. We have the sufficient biological needs to carry on alone. But when it comes to the psychological/the mental, I think that's what gets us/me. By societies norms, I've "learned" that being single is being alone and being alone is negative.

I want to be happy single and alone.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 06:03 AM

I think you can be happy and single for a certain amount of time, for as we all have the need to be loved and want companionship. Like you said, I know we're all capable of being single and surviving. I just think we still need someone. To fill that void.




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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 06:28 AM

I think you absolutely need companionship, friendship of some kind, even if just a little...but I think you can survive without romantic relationships, if you so choose.


Not around so much now that school's started

"Live a good life.
If there are gods and they are just,
then they will not care how devout you have been,
but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by.
If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them.
If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life
that will live on in the memories of your loved ones."
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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 07:05 AM

I'm gonna move this to the debates forum, seems to fit there better.
Move back if anyone disagrees.

If everyone was isolated and did not know of companionship, yes.

But since that is not the case, it is human nature to be with others. So, I don't think people can live forever without companionship in a life filled with other human beings.


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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 07:28 AM

I think we can be happy and healthy single, but not forever. Eventually everyone needs some type of companionship and everyone needs to feel loved. But I can be single and be perfectly happy for a good amount of time. Sometimes, I think being single is even more fun than being in a relationship; it's like being...I don't know, free in a sense.


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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 08:07 AM

I think some people can be content or even happy alone, but a lot of people, its not so true. As mentionned, at least friendships of sorts, as we are social beings. As for the single bit, I dont think you have to be in a relationship for the sake of being in one. Although I admittedly want a partner, I'm quite content with being single right now, but I have no relationship avaliable that I want to be in, so I know I'd be unhappy in one atm.

We have biological needs, but we have other needs as well.
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 09:49 AM

I've just come out of relationship, and I'd wanted to be single for a while. Mainly because in a relationship, people see you as a couple, not individuals. I love having the security of a boyfriend or girlfriend, but I also love being able to just be 'Bryden' rather than 'Bryden + 1'.
I think that to some degree we need to have other people, but the space is also necessary.


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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 11:38 AM

I'm perfectly happy being single. But alone? No. Humans need and crave interaction with others. I think it would be impossible to be alone for any long period of time.
I think its perfectly okay for a person to live their life single. Some people may feel that they NEED that attention that you get from a relationship. But I think they all grow out of it at one point, and stop getting a new boyfriend/girlfriend two days after the broke up with the last one.


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Love what is mortal; hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, let it go.
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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 11:47 AM

you cant be truly happy alone, of course you need friends and people, but i think the trick is knowing that people are only human and will make mistakes and do things for themselves before others(this doesnt mean theyre wrong of course everyone has to do this from time to time you cant live for other people) and just be prepared to accept that.

I love my friends, but i know that no one can be totally depended on(and I'm not trying to be all rebellious and dramatic, its just the way the world works). If you get used to this kind of thinking you'll get the hang of depending on yourself more maybe. I'm not saying dont ever depend on people either, just dont zone in on a particular person.

did that make sense?:S


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  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 12:10 PM

you cant be truly happy alone, of course you need friends and people, but i think the trick is knowing that people are only human and will make mistakes and do things for themselves before others(this doesnt mean theyre wrong of course everyone has to do this from time to time you cant live for other people) and just be prepared to accept that.

I love my friends, but i know that no one can be totally depended on(and I'm not trying to be all rebellious and dramatic, its just the way the world works). If you get used to this kind of thinking you'll get the hang of depending on yourself more maybe. I'm not saying dont ever depend on people either, just dont zone in on a particular person.

did that make sense to you?:S


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Can never see its purpose
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  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 03:08 PM

I don't think that everyone can be single and happy. There are people out there who just "need" a woman or a man by their side in order to feel complete. I've watched friends who were able to do anything as long as they had their girl by their side, but the moment she was gone they were weak.

Personally, I've done fine for quite a while alone. I don't think I can be single forever though. I'm one of those people who mentally needs someone to be there, needs someone to talk to and someone to love. I don't see myself happy as an old spinster. It really depends on your personality I guess. I know plenty of people that are content to live alone.


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  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 06:34 PM

When i'm with someone i want to be single and when i'm single i want to be with someone. Typical, eh?

I think i could definitely be happy if i was single for the rest of my life to be honest, as long as i had my friends and family.


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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 10:02 PM

I do not think you're biologically meant to be single. 'Love' and 'relationships' are all just tricks by instinct, made for the sole sake of reproduction. You need it because a species exists to reproduce.


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  (#14 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 10:19 PM

I don't think everybody needs a partner to be happy. Some people crave companionship, while others prefer to be alone. Personally, I would need someone but that's just me.
   
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 10:19 PM

I do believe you can be happy if you are not in a relationship, but it depends on who you are. Some people can get by just fine on their own, other people simply want someone in your life. But I honestly believe it's more of a want than a need. Everyone is perfectly capable of being on their own and surviving, but everyone, naturally, is human, and when you're human, you don't want to be alone. It's not as if you can't be, though. You just don't want to be. Some people feel that it is impossible to get by without a significant other in their life, and others are confident that they can live to the fullest without someone like that in their life. It's strictly a want, not a need, in my opinion.





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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 28th 2009, 10:56 PM

I believe certain people can be happier alone for longer times than others, however, I feel that humans need some sort of human-human interaction. It doesn't have to be a romantic relationship, it can simply be talking to someone whom you've never met before.

However, to answer it properly, it depends what you believe "happiness" is. It can be simply being content with having the proper resources for survival. Alternatively, it can be having good healthcare, human-human interaction or simply being successful indepedent of one's social interaction. There are other definitions but these were the first few that I thought of. Define your idea of "happiness" then your other questions can be answered in more or less a yes-no format.
   
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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 29th 2009, 12:14 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by CausticTears View Post
I believe we can biologically. We don't NEED anyone else but our own self. We have the sufficient biological needs to carry on alone. But when it comes to the psychological/the mental, I think that's what gets us/me. By societies norms, I've "learned" that being single is being alone and being alone is negative.

I want to be happy single and alone.
Forgive me for playing the "I believe at heart humans are still instinctual animals" card, but I have to. :-p

I do think part of the reason (besides societal conditioning) that people want to be with other people romantically is because humans are seen to be animals that mate for life, so to speak. (In the majority and exlcluding those who are antisocial, etc etc.) And in the majority of animals who mate for life, they have a deep need, instinct to procreate and reproduce, so they need to be with that other animal to do that.


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Re: Can we all live single and be happy? - March 29th 2009, 12:34 AM

it's just too nice to have someone there to talk to or comfort you. there's no way of being able to be completely alone and happy. socializing is good! i've been single for a long time now and i've had some periods of depression, but as soon as i start talking to someone i just feel better, happier.
so like many other have said; i think we can live single and be happy, but only for periods of time. eventually we'll need something more - a stronger bond or connection with someone.. i can feel the soul mates debate coming along here!


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