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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Cutie7519 Offline
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Exclamation How can God even love me? - June 10th 2012, 06:42 AM

Please, I don't want any fights on this alright?

How can God even love me? I'm a sick, sinful person... I have sinful thoughts run through my mind of having sex with someone I go to church with and I had contact with on a daily basic because this person is also my school teacher... I watched porn... I still have that running though my head... I feel like a fucking slut because I masturbate.

Yet how can God still really love me and still forgive me every fucking time I pray? I lie and you go to hell for lying. I've even been baptized and still I lie... Trying to stop those lies from slipping out but they still do.

I went to the mall today and looked at sex toys... Now that might really tell you how sexually sinful I actually am... I even write stories on two guys having anal sex and even in my mind... God..

How I am still loved by God for all of this? I keep saying I need help, but I will never receive the professional help I need. No wonder why I want to end my life...

I don't know why in the world I was placed down here in the first place if God knew this was going to happen to me. I wish he still kept me up there with him... Maybe then I wouldn't be stuck on this earth with how I am or the thoughts that I have.

Sorry for making this a longer post then what it needed to be..

"It's easier to run, replacing this pain with something numb, it's so much easier to go, than face all this pain here all alone."- Linkin Park, Easier to run

"When the nightmares take me, I will scream with the howling wind." Owl City, Lonely Lullaby

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Re: How can God even love me? - June 10th 2012, 07:15 AM

Sexual thoughts are normal. If I understand the concept of God correctly for your faith, I would say that god understands that you are a good person, and that it's normal for someone to think that way. This won't be something that sends you to hell. You can still be a great person, if you have strong sexual motivations.

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Re: How can God even love me? - June 10th 2012, 08:10 AM

If I were a betting man (or a man of faith), I would assume that God could forgive the inherent sexual nature of a person, so long as you hold faith in him. They may be sin, but they are not unforgiveable sins.
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Re: How can God even love me? - June 10th 2012, 01:22 PM

I am worse than you, I promise.

Perhaps you have an addiction.

Pornography and masturbation have a similar effect on the brain as drugs. Each time you masturbate, or look at porn, or any sexual thing that brings pleasure, your brain releases a chemical called dopamine. The more you look at these things, the more you will crave them because of this chemical. This also explains why you crave more and more sexual things. I.E. if you watch porn, you'll want to watch more than one video or look at more than one picture. They've ran tests on humans with this. If people sat in a room watching the same video, they would at first, be aroused. After awhile, however, it went away. So, they would show a new video, and the arousal would come back.

My point in saying all this, if you think you have a serious problem, you may need to therapist. Quitting pornography addiction and the like, for many people, is seemingly as difficult as quitting a drug addiction.

But, as far as the religious stuff goes, I would just read the Bible to find your answer. As the saying goes, opinions are like aholes. Everyone's got one, and they all stink.

In my experience, you won't get the satisfying answer you're looking for in a forum, nor through a pastor, or even friends, but the bible or prayer. But, for me, I think it was about being open with G-D. That is, I tell G-D that I hate Him, I tell Him that I abuse the blood of His Son through sinning, I confess a lot. It may seem like, "I don't want to confess that," but, if G-D knows everything, then there's no use in hiding it. And John says, whoever confesses their sin will be cleansed and forgiven.

Notice it says "cleansed." In other words, I believe, sin will begin to be removed from your life through confession.

Also, examine yourself. I found that I used to say, "I want to live righteous, I want to live for G-D." But, eventually, I began to realize that I don't. I want to sin, and I hate G-D. Yet, this is what Paul says about us, that we only want to sin, etc.

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love."
- Carl Sagan
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: How can God even love me? - June 10th 2012, 02:47 PM

Psalm 103:8-12 The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.

1 John 1:7-9 But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin. If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.

There is not a person in the world who does not sin. God doesn't expect us to be perfect. That's impossible. We have a sinful nature. If that wasn't the case, then there was no point in Jesus dying for us. When he died on the cross, he saved us for our sins. Nothing we can do ourselves will free us from our sins, only God can do that. You cannot expect yourself to be perfect anymore than you expect anyone else around you to be perfect.

Think of God as a parent. You might do many things to disappoint him, but he's not going to stop loving you. Why? Because he created you. God doesn't say "I will love you if you do this, or if you stop doing that." He says that he will love you eternally, even if you stray from him, and even if you sin. God loves everyone on this earth, even if they are the worst kind of sinner. You need to ask forgiveness for your sins, and try your best to keep away from them. But, that being said, you cannot expect yourself to be perfect. If you do, you will always fail. The only perfect one is God himself.

If you are worried about your salvation, remember that it isn't good deeds or being a good person that sends you to Heaven. It's purely belief. That is the only way you can be fully saved. God loves all of us, and he wants us to be the best we can be. That does not mean we have to be perfect. If you do your best, and you believe, then that is what God expects from you. Jesus died for us, and because of that you have been automatically forgiven. It is not through your good deeds or perfection that you will be loved or that you will be saved. It's through Jesus.

A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts

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Re: How can God even love me? - June 11th 2012, 07:17 PM

Toz got it in one - thoughts about sex are normal, and despite what you feel about yourself because of them God knows you are a good person and as Amanda points out His love isn't down to whether we do or don't do something. It's unconditional. Believe me, you are by no means the first person to be in that position and you certainly won't be the last. God knows us better than we know ourselves, and He knows why we struggle with certain things and not others - He doesn't hold our nature against us. It's how we choose to respond to our nature that counts, and that isn't over the course of a day, a month or a year. It's over a life. The fact that you have reacted to this as you have done is evidence enough that in time you will get through this. You just need to give yourself time and chance. It's not an easy thing to do - believe me, I know all too well on that one - and there will be times you fall down, but when it happens just pick yourself up and try again. That's all God asks of us, and it's all anyone else can ask of you as well. In the meantime, don't beat yourself up about it.

Hope some of that helps you, and if you want to PM/VM feel free to. Take care.

"The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." - Nelson Mandela, Long Walk to Freedom

However bleak things seem, however insurmountable the darkness appears, remember that you have worth and nothing can take that away.

Originally Posted by OMFG!You'reActuallySmart! View Post
If you're referring to dr2005's response, it's not complex, however, he has a way with words .
RIP Nick
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Re: How can God even love me? - June 12th 2012, 03:46 PM

Kate, the definition that you've given of yourself fits every single person in the world. Yes you are sinful, and no that's not good, but you're no worse than anyone else. Not that every single person has pre-marital sex and watches porn in particular, but every single person has evil and sin that's just as bad as yours. I may not have sinned in the same ways that you have, but in the course of my life I've lied, stolen, lusted (which Jesus said is adultery in your heart), hated people (which Jesus said is murder in your heart), hurt others, been jealous, been selfish, etc. etc. ...the list goes on. I don't deserve to be forgiven or loved by God. None of us do. That's what's so amazing about His love! You don't have to deserve it in order to receive it!

Here's something important to know: You will never be good enough for God. That may sound harsh, but listen- you don't have to be! Love isn't something that only stretches as far as you deserve. Love means unconditional commitment and mercey. Unconditional means "no matter what".

Here's something else you need to know: Admitting that you are a sinner and not worthy of God is the first step. Realizing that you can't reach perfection on your own is a good thing- it means that you realize you have to rely on God to do that part for you. Listen. Everyone is born sinful, and our sins separate us from God because He is so perfect. Since we all have evil hearts and are separated from God, we couldn't go to Heaven and be with Him when we died. We also couldn't have Him listen when we pray to Him, receive wisdom from the bible, etc. We would have to go to hell when we die to take the punishment for our sins and be forever separated from God.

BUT, there's good news. God loves and cherishes us so much that He didn't want that to happen to us, even if it is what we deserve. He desires to be with us forever and let us be called His children. But, sin has to be punished and dealt with. So, God sent His perfect Son, Jesus, to Earth to take the punishment for our sins for us. Jesus took all of our sins upon Himself and was tortured for hours and then killed by being hung on a wooden cross. He died so all of our sins would die with Him. He didn't stay dead though. On the third day after His death, God raised Him from the dead, defeating sin forever!

Here's the thing about this amazing gift that God gave to us: Just like with any gift we've ever gotten, we have to receive it and not turn it away in order for our sins to be gone. If someone tries to give you a gift and you say "no thanks" or don't take it from them, you don't get the gift, right? It's the same with God's gift to us. We have to accept it by admitting that we are sinners, confess that Jesus is Lord and He saved us from sin, believing all of this, and repenting once and for all. The word "repent" literally means "change of mind". In other words, admitting that sin is bad and that you want to live for God instead. Of course you will probably still mess up, everyone does, but the really amazing thing about this gift of forgiveness is that it lasts forever! You don't have to keep being re-saved from sin every time you mess up. When you receive the gift of being forgiven, it is a one time gift that covers you for your whole life. You become "born again", which means that your old sinful self is gone and God puts His Holy Spirit in you, giving you a new start with Him. Of course we still should do the right thing and need to try to, just out of love and respect for God...but you're still saved even if you mess up.

After you have received the gift of being saved/forgiven, THAT is when you should get baptized. Being baptized is a symbol of the fact that you were saved and washed clean of sin. The dunking under water isn't what saves you; it's just a symbol and celebration of the fact that you were already saved. If you are just understanding this for the first time and just got saved, you can still get baptized even though you already did before you understood.

I know this is a lot to take in, so please reply here or in a private message if you have any questions or if you want bible verses to back any of this up so you know I'm not just making it up. And if you still aren't sure if you believe it, pray and ask God to show you Himself. I'm praying for you.

Last edited by Megan1; June 12th 2012 at 05:56 PM.
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Re: How can God even love me? - June 12th 2012, 04:11 PM

Everything you described is normal, Kate. God doesn't expect perfection. He knows we're sinful beings. It's the reason He sent Jesus - to be a sacrifice for our sins. He bore the punishment that we were supposed to get. Because of Him, all we need to do is ask God for forgiveness with a sincere heart. That's it. We're forgiven instantly.

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." -1 John 1:9

The best part about that: God forgets our sins. I know, it sounds crazy that God can forget anything. But, He does. It says so in His Word. If you confess your sins to God and ask for His forgiveness, He'll give you a clean slate. To Him, it will be like it never happened before. That happens every time, too. Not once. Not seven times. But, every time you sin and repent. That's how wonderful His love is. He doesn't want to send you to Hell. So, if you have accepted Him and come to Him with a sincere heart, He will forget your sins entirely.

"For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." -Hebrews 8:12

He doesn't just forget them, though. He casts them as far as the east is from the west. Now, I don't know how far that actually is (I'm not sure I could find it if I looked), but I'm willing to bet that it's a HUGE distance. God is flinging your sin so far away from the both of you that there is no way it can be drawn back up for you to be judged with. It's gone. On top of that, His love for you knows no bounds. It doesn't matter how terrible of a sinner you are. His love is as high as Heaven is above the Earth. Again, I have no idea how great of a distance that is, but that tells me that it's a massive distance. His love for you is so great that you can't measure it with numbers. It's measured by something so much bigger than that and that will never, ever change.

"For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His love for those who fear Him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." -Psalm 103:11-12

Like I said before, we all sin. Every last one of us. Whether we call it sin or something else, it's there. But, when you accept Christ, that is washed away every single time you ask Him for it. Granted, that's not a "Get Out of Jail Free" card. But, His love for you will not end, simply because you're not perfect. That's not our God at all. I hope you can take some comfort in that.

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Re: How can God even love me? - June 12th 2012, 04:42 PM

Do not worry. you know well why Jesus died for us... his sacrifice was for people just like you and me, knowing well what our struggles and sins were! He gives us hope and a way of change, and even though you may not see it now, there is a lovely life awaiting you someday. God loves everyone and you should beat yourself up over your sins, everyone falls short of perfection. I sturggle with lust very much and alot of that you told doesnt seem odd for a teenager, many struggle with such things. I'm sorry that you are so hurt by your short-comings, but I pray that you will find peace, and can, someday, move past them. God loves even the worst sinners, we are all his children, and you are by far not the worst! ♥ May you be well!

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Re: How can God even love me? - June 12th 2012, 05:24 PM

You are normal there is nothing wrong with you.
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Re: How can God even love me? - June 14th 2012, 05:44 AM

The amazing thing about God is that he knows we are sinners. He knows we are not perfect. He knows that we screw up. And through it all He still loves us. That's what is so amazing: no matter what happens, no matter how far you fear you've strayed, how terrible you feel about yourself, or how small of insignificant, God is always there to turn to again.

Everyone person in the world has asked themselves the question you did, and the answer is still always the same: because He loves you and made you.

That said, I noticed that a lot of your sinful concerns are centered around the topic of sexual activity or gratification. It's fine if you have chosen a life path in which you choose to forgo activities like intercourse and masturbation, for example, if you are choosing to wait until marriage to have a sexual relationship.

However, I encourage you to recognize the difference between choosing such a path and fearing the alternative. This applies to many aspects of religion, but for now I will keep it simple.

Here's the deal: there is nothing wrong with sex.

You don't have an addiction.

You don't have a "problem."

And you don't need professional help.

It's NATURAL to want to have sex, to be curious about sex, and to explore sexuality. In fact, it's developmentally important. Feeling sexual urges is a good thing. It's a part of the bodies that God gave us.

Everybody is going to have their own opinion of what christianity should look like, but I personally have never seen anything wrong with masturbation, sex toys, or looking at porn. I know sex is not something to be feared or though of as taboo, because it's something our bodies were made to enjoy. It's a way to learn about ourselves and, in time, others.

So if you have chosen a path where you don't want to engage in these activities, great; more power to you. But if you have fallen into it out of fear of consequences then that is no way to live. It's not the spirit of christianity to believe out of fear of Hell or abandonment from God. It's the spirit to choose to follow in His path each and every day. You CHOOSE, not fall into it out of fear.

Always, in the end, God will love you, and help you take the path you want to take with Him.

You're an amazing person no matter what.

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The moon asked the crow...
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Re: How can God even love me? - June 14th 2012, 10:01 PM

We are all sick sinful people but that's the wonder of god and he forgives us for all the sins we do

“ let it be known to all of you and to all the people of Israel that by the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, whom you crucified, whom God raised from the dead—by him this man is standing before you well. This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone. And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.” Acts 4:10-12

You see even if mankind rejects you god will forgive.
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