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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
The Darkness Offline
Nothing Began Everything
Junior TeenHelper
The Darkness's Avatar
Name: Raphael
Gender: Nonbinary (They/Them)
Location: California

Posts: 337
Blog Entries: 13
Join Date: February 27th 2010

Exclamation Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 05:54 AM

Passing by
You light up my darkest skies
You'll take only seconds
to draw me in.
be mine,
And your innocence
I will consume

Who’s so phoney and always surrounded?
Stop your screaming, no one can hear
All the scars on your skin: "Post no bills"
Who you were
Was so beautiful
Remember who, who you were

Hide from the mirror, the cracks and the memories
Hide from your family, they won’t know you now
For all the holes in our soul host no thrills

Who you were
Was so beautiful
Memories who, who you were
My life is a wreck, so is everyone elses.
I do not wish to complain, but wish is nothing we can control, must is.

Hello there.
My name is Waltera, but you may call me The Darkness.
I have my likes, dislikes, ect. but some people in the world just don't seem to understand that.
Let's take an example: Mother.
She says I can't like my favorite book (GONE) because it's bad (she hasn't even read it!). I can't like my favorite show (Supernatural) because it'll traumatize me (hasn't seen it either). I can't like the color black because it's a bad color. I can't be on this thing (but I am anyways 'cause I need it!) because I'm talking to randoms and that's bad.
And here's the most horrid and shaming thing: I can't ask for help. I can't reach out. Why? I have no idea! Maybe because I never asked for her help! Can't she just be happy that I am ok, alive, well, at home, and am not cutting anymore?!?!
I can't anyways, can't cut. Or else the school, which has caused what I think is schizophrenia, is going to take me again to Willow Rock, a mental hospital. I like it there, they were nice and I felt happy (except for the feeling of loss...) and I felt safe and sane. My mom doesn't like it there 'cause I was away.
It's a funny thing 'cause I wasn't suppose to say all that either. Oh, rebellion is good.
I cannot say what has occurred for me to cut, that is gained in trust.
Hmmm, what else do you wish to know?

Let's see:
Gender: Female
Location: stalker much!
Relationships: Ah yes...
Oh well!
My heart's soul is sad. My soul's heart is consumed. My heart's heart is dead. My soul's soul is just gone. Has been, always will be.
In other words I am in love and the one that I love is mean and doesn't even like to look at me but thinks that's rude 'cause we're friends.
Anything else?
I write. I don't think it's good.
And so dies once more as another girl is dead and reborn. Thank you all and I wish to grow friendships with you all.
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
MegaMadness Offline
Fight My Llama
Jeez, get a life!
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Name: Megan
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Aussie Land

Posts: 5,564
Blog Entries: 16
Join Date: October 11th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 07:08 AM

Hey there Waltera and welcome to TH!
I'm Megan and I'm a buddy here.
You've come to the right place. Th is great.
Anyways, if you ever need anything feel free to message me anytime and I'll be happy to help.

Come on boys, come on girls
In this crazy, crazy world
You’re the diamonds, you’re the pearls
Let’s make a new tomorrow
Come on girls, come on boys
It’s your future, it’s your choice
And your weapon is your voice
Let’s make a new tomorrow
follow me please. I'll follow back. http://photographicjournal.tumblr.com/
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
hopefaithlove Offline
I've been here a while
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Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: United States

Posts: 1,332
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Join Date: January 7th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 04:51 PM

Hey Waltera! Welcome to the site. Let me know if you need anything at all!

There is always hope. PM me anytime.
SH Free since 10.20.08
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
lauren_160 Offline
Experienced TeenHelper
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Name: Lauren
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: UK

Posts: 554
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 05:48 PM

Hey welcome to TH, if you need anything drop me a pm xx


"The stars are always there but we miss them in the dirt and clouds. We miss them in the storms. Tell them to remember hope. We have hope."

"But in the ruins there is still a canvas. There is still beauty in your brokenness. The faded scars show healing reminding me that even though I’ve been in dark places, I’ve survived and learned and become stronger".

  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Stardaze Offline
Hopeless Love
Jeez, get a life!
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Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: California

Posts: 5,799
Blog Entries: 275
Join Date: November 7th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 05:54 PM

Hey there. Welcome to Teen Help.
I'm Angelina, and I'm just another buddy here.
Drop me a PM if you have any questions.

  (#6 (permalink)) Old
.Brittany. Offline
AKA Reckless Emotion

TeenHelp Addict
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Name: Brittany
Gender: Female
Location: 100 Acre Woods

Posts: 7,924
Blog Entries: 209
Join Date: January 12th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 05:54 PM

Welcome to TeenHelp!

“You are braver than you believe,
stronger than you seem,
and smarter than you think.”

HelpLINK Mentor | Live Help Mentor | Article Editor
Forum & Chat Moderator
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
Whisperer Offline
Find yourself and be that
I've been here a while
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Name: Alessa
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Posts: 1,937
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Join Date: May 17th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 06:40 PM

Hiya The Darkness,
That was an amazing introduction I must say! I definately agree with you that mothers can be very annoying, but they are still our mothers. Sometimes that's a good thing, other times not so much. I'm glad you've come across this site though. Here you CAN reach out and people will listen and help. It's very supportive and non-judgemental so feel free to let loose and just pour your heart and soul out. (Well, if you want to that is.) Did you write that poem? It's really quite amazing. I love how it compares the past and present with emotions. Since you like writing, you might like the Self Expression forum. It's a nice place to show your work to others, whether it's a story, artwork, or poems. Also, since it's your first time here you may want to read though this and this. They are both very helpful in learning about all the features here and how to use them. If you have any questions, or just want someone to talk to, don't hesitate to ask me!
Hope to see ya around,

Whatever it is, chances are I've been there.
If I can make it out, you can too.
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
honeycake Offline
If you need a friend, i'm here
Experienced TeenHelper
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Name: jodie
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Location: north east England

Posts: 603
Blog Entries: 116
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 1st 2010, 08:40 PM

Hey there, i'm Jodie and welcome to TH. I hope you enjoy your time with us if you need anything just pm me or other members. We are always happy to help, also there's sticky threads that can help too .

Darlin' don't leave me out here in the cold
I'm begging you baby don't leave me out here on my own I'll die, If you don't hold me tight Tonight, I couldn't make it outside If I tried, So please let me in lover,
Be kind ♥

Last edited by honeycake; March 1st 2010 at 08:46 PM.
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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Ngikhona Offline
I've been here a while
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Name: Keeley Siobhan
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Colorado

Posts: 1,605
Blog Entries: 22
Join Date: April 26th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 2nd 2010, 09:00 PM

Hello hello, Waltera. Welcome to TeenHelp. I'm Keeley and I'm a Buddy and Chat Moderator. You seem like quite the creative personality, which is greatly appreciated here. You should consider making some blogs on here or putting some posts in the Self Expression forum. You should also stop by Chat sometime. We love newbies... . Hope to see you around. Shoot me a message if you have any questions.

"Love me for me, accept the fact I'm true, live like I want, fufill my dreams,
Dream of me, run out free, capture your words and never let them go."

I'll see you on the other side.
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
arepo Offline
I can't get enough
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Posts: 2,434
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: June 7th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 2nd 2010, 10:42 PM

Heya Waltera or Le Darkness! Welcome to TeenHelp! Best emote ever, yes? (That one's quite awesome too.)
You can call me Immy, or anything that you'd like to really. I really liked the things you quoted, whether they were something you wrote or just something I haven't seen before, I liked it. And to mention, I don't think it's shaming or horrid that you find it hard to reach out and talk to people about what's going on. I'm the same way. But it's not anything to be ashamed of. I also think it's wonderful you've stopped SHing, that's a hard thing to do.
Anyways, if you have any questions or just want to talk randomly to some awesome randomer, drop me a line.

Take ca(k?)e. x

“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
MermaidMassacre Offline
Finding beauty in darkness.
I've been here a while
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Name: Bridget
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: Land of all them lakes...

Posts: 1,362
Join Date: July 10th 2009

Re: Who I was, was so beautiful - March 14th 2010, 03:50 AM

Hello, and welcome!
I must say that is one of the grandest entrances I have seen on the site. =P
Sorry to hear about all that, I can imagine it being very stressful.
Luckily here, no one judges and we are hear to help. =)
So again, welcome to TeenHelp! Hope you enjoy your stay.

I'll do whatever it takes to be the mistake you can't live without.
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