Triggering: The Girl

[13reasonswhy]

This is the first draft. So please feel free to give me suggestions. Sorry about the length. I usually don't write poetry this long:


The girl was a happy one.
She would yell at the top of her lungs,
smile all the time,
and be lost in her own world.

She was a victim,
bullies surrounding her.
She knew what she should have done;
punched the living shit out of them and walk away.

But she couldn't.
Instead she let it happen.
"Fat" "Ugly" "Freak" "Stupid" she was called.
She didn't let herself cry until she was alone.

As time grew, and the name-calling continued,
the girl wasn't happy anymore.
She couldn't look in the mirror without sobbing.
She lost faith in herself.

The blade would slide across the wrist every night
of the girl who couldn't stay strong.
If she could see her blood, she was alive,
she had control.

Losing blood didn't make her skinny.
And she had to find a way.
She starved plenty
and lost all interest in anything but her appearance.

She wore long sleeves to cover up the scars,
and baggy clothes to cover up her bones.
She lost herself and couldn't take the pain.
She needed to get out some way.

She took a knife vertical down her arm
and stuck her head under the water.
She stayed in until her lungs hurt.
She popped her head up and sobbed.

"Why?" she cried,
cleaning her bloody mess.
She gripped the knife,
desiring to slit her throat.

But she slowly put the knife down
and quickly cleaned up.
Her parents would be home soon.
And she wouldn't let them see.

Finally she told her school counselor everything.
The girl poured her heart out to that woman.
And within the months, she'd feel a little better,
with the help of that woman.

The girl is now recovering.
She no longer starves, bleeds, or feels like dying.
She's starting her life over;
healthy and fresh.

Although she still has urges,
she knows how to fight them off.
Thanks to her counselor
she has that self-confidence.

How do I know this?
Well that girl is me.
Now I'm living life to the fullest
and finding out who I'll be.

[Cataclysmic]

This is really powerful, it definitely tells a story.

[Jovial.]

I agree with Dez, this is a beautiful piece of writing.

[better-than-ecstasy]

This is amazing! It has a lot of meaning to it. I could feel all of the emotion. This is great! Stay strong.

[Koharuchan]

Definitely agree with the others. I could really feel the emotion behind this, it's a wonderful piece of writing. I had to deal with bad bullies myself, and it can be very hard to overcome those scars. I'm glad you're doing better, congratulations and stay strong.