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f0steredlove Offline
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it's your loss - March 8th 2010, 07:31 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

this is my first spoken word piece here so i would really appreciate comments and input! thanks

it's your loss you don't know

that when i can no longer wear my hair down im insecure

that i wished for freckles on my knees on my 16th birthday because you are supposed to wish for managable ideals. what i really wanted would have put out the dim glow and my heart needed the warmth to remain beating. turns out that self esteem never lies behind the smoke of birthday candles. just the expectant faces of your family, wanting to be let in on your secret.

that i burned myself once. it began swollen and rippled. ominous, purple. i ran my finger over it countless times before it etched a bleak, white crevice in my bicep. 'this is mine, i want you to ask me about it' my eyes plead. but i don't.

that if i can wash the dishes i promise i will be completely happy. not because i'm an independent woman, i just belong when i run my hands through the bubley water and chip away at the mess. i shouldn't need to finish them because i should be able to ask you for help. because there is no one else who can reach past the spines of independence. and i am trying to let you in.

that you can dry the dishes but mostly you should tease me.

that i can't play the piano in front of you without turning red and trembling all over.

that i can't stand hypocrisy. and that's why when you ask if there is anything you can do to help i don't ask you to hold me until the searing points of light begin to penetrate our shield of darkness. or hold my hand in silence until i'm healed. i told you that i'm not into you but i don't yet know how you read appearances.

that you should help quench this dry spell. because i can't keep down ideas anymore.

that i want you to see me cry, but just once. because maybe then you would be the first one to say i love you.
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DanielR Offline
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Re: it's your loss - March 10th 2010, 03:48 PM

Wow... I had to read it a few times to understand it (it was a bit jumbled)... but after reading it, it made sense to me. I would REALLY love to hear it spoken, as it probably would sound much better (youtube it?)...
Very well done.. I would love to see more of these

I don't like to whizz in people's pockets, so I will always give you truth. I'm opinionated, so take what I say with a cup of salt.

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f0steredlove Offline
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Name: Persephone
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Join Date: February 25th 2010

Re: it's your loss - March 10th 2010, 03:55 PM

youtube....can do! and i was wondering if it was jumbled to other people so thanks for clarifying that. it does make more sense spoken so ill work on that. and more are to come....
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comment, denial, identity, loss, relationship

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