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why would he do this? - April 22nd 2012, 06:48 PM

I found out the guy i've been consistently seeing and talking to took another girl home from the bar last night after we spent the night before together. I am obviously going to talk to this about him in person but I am really devastated and feel used. He did ask what I was doing last night but I didn't respond to his text because I was upset with him for being kind of rude earlier in the day. But that does not make it okay for him to bring another girl home! He has told me he likes me but when he is drunk he acts the opposite and like a different person.
   
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Re: why would he do this? - April 22nd 2012, 07:22 PM

Okay, so disregard that PM I just replied to, I feel like it's probably useless having read this thread.

Have you had an exclusivity talk?

idk, based on this/your other thread, I don't think your relationship with this guy is going to go much of anywhere.
   
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Re: why would he do this? - April 22nd 2012, 07:42 PM

Hate to disagree here, but technically he did nothing wrong. If I am not mistaken, you are not exclusive. Even if you both like each other, you aren't in a relationship together. Ergo, he IS still free to sleep with other people if he so chooses.

Did it hurt you a lot? Yes, and you are allowed to feel hurt. But he didn't didn't betray you or do anything wrong.

You obviously want this guy to be more than a friend with benefits. So talk to him. Because right now, you're drawing it out. It's unfair to get angry with him for "owing" you his faithfulness. He doesn't. So if you want to be in a relationship, talk to him. Otherwise, this definitely won't go anywhere. If you want to see if it will, that takes a conversation.


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Re: why would he do this? - April 22nd 2012, 07:47 PM

guys do that often... a few of them just fake their feelings and when they get drunk their true colours surface... it seems prejudiced of me but it IS like that for most people... even girls... so when you date someone you should be sure that it'll work out and also that they're not just pretending... talk to him and he may say that it didn't happen... give him another chance if you want but make sure it doesn't happen again... and next time, make a good choice...
   
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Re: why would he do this? - April 22nd 2012, 07:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
Hate to disagree here, but technically he did nothing wrong. If I am not mistaken, you are not exclusive. Even if you both like each other, you aren't in a relationship together. Ergo, he IS still free to sleep with other people if he so chooses.

Did it hurt you a lot? Yes, and you are allowed to feel hurt. But he didn't didn't betray you or do anything wrong.

You obviously want this guy to be more than a friend with benefits. So talk to him. Because right now, you're drawing it out. It's unfair to get angry with him for "owing" you his faithfulness. He doesn't. So if you want to be in a relationship, talk to him. Otherwise, this definitely won't go anywhere. If you want to see if it will, that takes a conversation.

Only quoting this because I'm not sure if you meant you disagree with me - if that's what you meant, the case is actually that I agree with what you're saying about this. They obviously have different expectations that haven't been clarified.
   
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Re: why would he do this? - April 23rd 2012, 12:19 AM

As said before, I don't think you two had the exclusive talk, therefore he did nothing wrong. Being rude isn't an excuse to bring other girls home, but being single is.











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Re: why would he do this? - April 23rd 2012, 12:24 AM

You should have a talk with him if you want to keep your relationship exclusive. I would also wait until he is tested before having sex again, since you do not know about the girl he slept with, and it's better to be safe, although I assume you're always using condoms. (Or...hoping...as I hope everybody does. )


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