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Exclamation nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:10 AM

ok so i went on nuvaring because my boyfriend is coming to visit tomorrow and it slipped out while i was in the shower yesterday. i rinsed it off and set it in my shower caddy so i could finish washing my hair and i forgot to put it back in....until like 10 hours later...when its not supposed to be out for more than 3. ugh...how screwed am i for his visit tomorrow? the info sheet said if its our for more than 3 hours then contraceptive effectiveness may be reduced....like it might not be? >.>


   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:25 AM

If you plan on having sex with him have him wear a condom as well for extra protection. That or don’t have sex.




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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:26 AM

If it says that contraceptive effectiveness may be reduced then you need to use another form of birth control, better safe than sorry.
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:35 AM

yea i think we're going to try the sponge. it has spermicide in it and blocks and absorbs sperm too but its more comfy and natural than condoms. its a little less effective than condoms but that plus my birth control with the effectiveness reduced should be ok for one weekend right? we dont use condoms


   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:48 AM

Wait, you're on another form of birth control in addition to the nuva ring? The sponge is better than nothing however I would just want to say that I read that "the sponge is 89 to 91 percent effective with correct and consistent use; it is 84 to 87 percent effective with incorrect and/or inconsistent use." so really, not as good as a condom. http://www.goaskalice.columbia.edu/1477.html I just want to make sure you're aware. And if you are only on the ring, then if you had it out for more than 3 hours, you really shouldn't count it as any type of protection.
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:54 AM

yes im aware of the effectiveness but that's for a year not for a weekend. they did the math on the website and it was like 1 baby per 1000 acts of sex. i know its not as effective as condoms, i said that before. no im not on any other birth control besides nuvaring but it said effectiveness may be reduced not eliminated and it said to use a backup...backup as in "just in case it doesnt work"


   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 04:23 AM

I'm not gunna lie, I think you're not being all that smart with how you're saying this. "Oh it's just one weekend not one year". I've met people who said "oh it's just once" but just once is all it takes. then before you know it they've got a baby on board sticker in the car. If you're going to have sex, I'd go with condom.
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 04:27 AM

well he has really big issues with condoms and isnt open to them at all so its really not an option. the sponge is 89-91% effective and i should still have some protection from the ring. i thought it would be safe enough for one weekend.


   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 06:50 AM

Hm. Unless he's allergic to the latex, couldn't he possibly push those views/aversions aside for one weekend? Honestly, given the situation, I really feel it'd be best, but then, that's merely my opinion.
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:18 PM

hes not allergic but no he really cant...i did try


   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 03:36 PM

If he loved you enough to have sex with you, he would use the condom.
   
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May 6th 2010, 03:43 PM

he just cant get this idea out of his head that theyre for like one night stands and such. ive tried to talk to him about it but he just wont listen so ive given up. i tried again for this but he got upset with me =/ its not even a comfort thing for him or him being selfish...it would just pretty much ruin it for him and that would ruin it for me. at least we're looking at other options and not just risking it. can you guys stop posting about condoms please? i know he's ridiculous sometimes but he does love me very much and i dont appreciate you suggesting that he doesnt. I know you're trying to help but for me that's really not very helpful.

oh and by the way its not just ONE weekend like one weekend in a ton of weekends we have...its long distance. he is flying here to see me. he lives about 9 hours away by car and we only see each other about once every three months or so. so this visit is a really big deal and we want to make the best of it.



Last edited by Lizzie; May 6th 2010 at 04:36 PM. Reason: Merge Double Posts
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 04:34 PM

Condoms are for one night stands? If anything, they're used less on one night stands, these days! If your boyfriend won't use a condom for you, for one weekend until your other contraceptive has corrected himself, then I think he's being a bit selfish. Because if you end up pregnant from this one weekend, then you're going to feel really stupid for not using a condom. It's only for one weekend, and it's better than being a parent at your age. If he has a problem with using a condom, then tell him that it's either no sex, chance of pregnany or put a hat on it.

This visit might be a big deal, but it could also be the weekend that you get pregnant. I know you'd like us to stop posting about condoms, but it's the most effective way to prevent pregnancy, especially on short notice (Not enough time for pills to work etc). I strongly advise you use a condom, even if it's just for one weekend that you see each other. Otherwise in a few weeks you could potentially be pregnant.

Please re-think what everyone has said.



   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 04:35 PM

I know you said you wish to stop talking about it, so I am just going to make this one last post.

This isen't about him not loving you, I'm not questioning that. Him saying that a condom will ruin sex for him sounds a little selfish to me. I personally would not be comfortable with having sex knowing that my form of protection has been severely weakened.

You need to talk to him and let him know that this happened. And that you would feel more comfortable using a second form of protection. I don’t think its fair for you always to have to use protection and him never to use protection. That’s not a give and take in a relationship. You have sex together you should both be making equal contributions. And the fact that he gets mad at you when you bring it up is not a happy situation for you to be in.

Personally, I would let him know ahead of time what happened. Let him know it was an accident, but that you really can’t rely just on the ring this weekend. And if he wants to have sex that he should pick up some condoms on his way over. Let him take some of the responsibility. If he doesn’t pick some up, then I guess you know he doesn’t want to have sex that weekend. You shouldn’t feel like you always have to provide the protection. He shouldn’t make you do that, or feel like you do have to do that.

I hope you two figure something out and everything works out.




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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 05:35 PM

I'm seeing my boyfriend a grand total of three times this year, and if I ever fell off my birth control, no matter what his reasons were, I would make him wear a condom. -shrug- So maybe the odds are more in your favour than they are in the favour of getting pregnant, but why bank on those odds? People out there get pregnant even with double, even triple, the contraception; I just don't understand how you can counter weakened protection with another method of protection that's not even above 95%. But it's not my decision. I agree with Lizzie, however. My boyfriend is bringing condoms when he flies out to see me, not necessarily because we're going to have sex but because we want two forms of birth control if we do. And honestly, if a guy was ever adament about how condoms were only for one night stands, I would bluntly refuse to have sex with him (unless he was tested and tested clean, and even then, only if I were in the high 90s percentage rate) unless he had condoms, and I would also be paranoid that he, like most guys, liked bareback better, and as such, didn't even want to get over his issue; that's my only concern, is that your boyfriend doesn't want to work through these issues for whatever reason, if even, if you're having sex, he should be working on that. But you do what you want, obviously, as it's your life, and I'm simply expressing my opinion. If you want to use the sponge, then the sponge it is! No one else here can change your mind.
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 08:44 PM

well just so you know we've both been tested and are both clean so stds arent a problem


   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 6th 2010, 11:02 PM

But pregnancy is! You're taking a big risk here. No one wants you to be posting on here again in a few weeks in the Pregnancy forum. You really need to think what's more important here. Your boyfriend using a condom, something that he doesn't really like doing, but it wont kill him or change his life. Or, risk having a child. Causing a lot of stress, and if it does happen, then it truely is lifechanging, and not necessarily for the good at this point in your life.

All this talk about condoms might be irritating, but we're all only looking out for you. Please rethink all we've said, and I hope you have a lovely, safe, weekend.



   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 8th 2010, 11:40 PM

Well worst-case, maybe get the Plan B pill, if you only plan on doing it once, or if its multiple times within less than 48-72 hours. I forget exactly. I'll link you the website.

http://www.planb.ca/

This should give you plenty of information, though I don't know where you're from, so not sure of the availability. Maybe ask your local pharmacist?
   
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Re: nuvaring slipped out - May 10th 2010, 03:48 AM

well we ended up using the sponge but having some sex issues anyway. i guess we were too rough when it had been a while since the last time and i was hurting the rest of the weekend. the sponge was irritating more and i ended up just hating it. we didnt have sex at all for the last 2 days.

*sigh* i am nervous about pregnancy though and my body is reacting really strangely. i had a really weird discharge after using the sponge and today i was bleeding some when my period isnt due until about the 20th. i dont really know whats going on. i figured maybe its spotting because my birth control was out for too long before? but i thought that if it was that then it would have happened that day?


   
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