Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Pressured (trigger: includes greiving!!!)

[miztwixbar]

I'm 13 years old, and i have a Boyfriend... That keeps on tryinto fuck me!!!!!!!!!!!! He makes me guilty and tells me about blue balls... he has tried to rape me before, but I can't help but forgive him because he was my brother's best friend before he died.
idk what to do!!!!!!!
HELP!
Katy

[Colt]

Originally Posted by miztwixbar

I'm 13 years old, and i have a Boyfriend... That keeps on tryinto fuck me!!!!!!!!!!!! He makes me guilty and tells me about blue balls... he has tried to rape me before, but I can't help but forgive him because he was my brother's best friend before he died.
idk what to do!!!!!!!
HELP!
Katy

Katy,

Tell him no. Never give in. He wants you to do something you do not want to do, and in my opinion, far too young to be doing.

You have done nothing wrong. You have no reason to feel guilty or ashamed of what he is doing. The boy is taking advantage of your emotional attachment to him, and the fact that we was your brothers friend.

What would your brother think of his friend if he knew he was trying to rape his sister?

You need to tell an adult. And you need to cut all ties with this boy. Break up with him and tell him you do not want to see him again.

You deserve better than to have this scumbag take advantage of you.

[Boobies]

Tell him to bugger off... Or tell him to go an have a wank...
Perhaps you should be with someone else that's at the same stage as you though...

[taylalatbh.]

You need to tell him NO!

There's no such thing as blue balls. If he wants a release, he can do it himself. You do NOT have to do anything you don't want to. Tell him no, and if he doesn't listen to you and respect you, then I think you should dump him. He doesn't respect you at all and you could do better than him.

He's not worth it!

[Kyeto-X]

You need to tell him no, loud, firm and in control. You do not need to have sex with anyone that you do not feel 1000% ready to have sex with.

Blueballs are not life threatening, and he should know how to deal with it himself.

If this is a common theme in your relationship, it might be time to consider breaking it off. Even though he was your late brother's best friend, that in no way gives him the right to do that to you. Nothing give anyone the right to demand sex from another person unwillingly. I did not know your brother, but I would think that he would be furious to know that his best friend was treating you like this. You do not deserve to be treated like this.

[Dana]

I think you should break it off ASAP. If he has tried to rape you before, then you don't need that kind of guy in your life, especially since you're only 13. That's totally unacceptable. I agree, you should tell an adult you trust and cut all ties with this guy. Also, seeing a grief counselor might help you with letting go. Just because he was your brother's best friend doesn't mean that he gets a free pass for everything he does wrong. In fact, I think your brother would be ashamed if he knew how his friend was acting... pressuring you into sex, trying to rape you... some friend. Take care, okay?

[Kitty.]

I agree with all of the above posters that you need to say no and break it off with him. He has no right to say things like that. He can get a release himself if he really wants it.

You should also report him for attempted rape.

Take care.

[LittleMiss]

You're in danger girl, get out NOW!

Blue balls is just an excuse for another attempt to force you to have sex. There's no such thing!

You need to report him for sexual assault, you're only 13 and you need adults to protect you from him.

[Simplyme7]

Do not ever let a guy pressure you into doing something that you don't want to do. Especially not sex. I know that you don't want to break it off because he was your brothers best friend, but I seriously doubt that your brother would want him acting like that you, his sister. In fact, if he was still here he would probably beat the crap out of him for it.

I am sorry to hear about your loss, but you do not need to allow this other boy to be like this to you because of it.

I agree with possibly going to a counselor to talk about dealing with the loss of you brother, but most importantly, I feel that you need to break it off with your current boyfriend. He is obviously not good for you, and you deserve much better.

PM me anytime sweetheart, and take care.

[Colt]

Originally Posted by LittleMiss

Blue balls is just an excuse for another attempt to force you to have sex. There's no such thing!

But hey - if he tries it again, you're within your rights to throw some purple into the mix with a bit of force behind your heel.

[DeadlySin]

No guy should pressure you into anything.
Especially if he tried to rape you.
Say no to him, and get out of the relationship.
That's all you should do.

[miztwixbar]

It might sound weird... but he is the only connection to my brother I have left

[thebigmole]

Originally Posted by miztwixbar

It might sound weird... but he is the only connection to my brother I have left

You are your own connection to your brother, this guy isn't worth it.

[LucyLouWho]

Would your brother approve of him trying to make you have sex with him? Honestly, I would think that your brother would be happier knowing that you're not being put into that kind of situation.

You need to tell him no and get rid of him. You don't need a guy like that. And you're so young... You have so much time and many more opportunities to find a guy who will be so much better to you.

Don't give in to the blue balls excuse either. He can take care of that himself... That's his excuse for trying to convince you to do it.

Hang in there, dear... I really hope that you do the right thing. Take care of yourself.

[Colt]

Originally Posted by miztwixbar

It might sound weird... but he is the only connection to my brother I have left

And your brother would kick his ass for forcing sex on you.

Get him out of your life, for your own safety.

[miztwixbar]

Another sticky thing is that the times I resist he hits me or does something bad like that or humilliates me online

[Colt]

Originally Posted by miztwixbar

Another sticky thing is that the times I resist he hits me or does something bad like that or humilliates me online

Kate, since you first posted, have you been able to confront this problem? Let us know how things go, as they happen. It's best to act sooner rather than later.

Under what circumstances does he hit you? Are you still his "girlfriend"? Does he hit you at school? At your house? At his house? In public?

I realise you don't want to hear this, but I think the only way you are going to be able to deal with this situation is to cut this boy out of your life entirely.

Are you willing to do that?

We can only help you if you are truly willing to help yourself. It's not going to be fun, but if you truly want to escape the situation you are in now, you need to act. We're all here to help you, talk to us. We are willing to help comfort you and give you advice and reassurance as you deal with this terrible boy..

Good luck! Stay in contact and let us know how you get on.

Regards,

Colt

[Youth Pastor]

Kate, you're 13, and this is not a good start to learning about a relationship. As some other people have said this is someone to break up with. Yes, I realize he's your brother's best friend but this isn't a relationship, it's one sided. Someone else said you are forever connected to your brother which is true. Your boyfriend doesn't help you become closer because he's not family.

[Unicorn ♥✿]

Have the confidence to say NO!

[miztwixbar]

I have decided to do everything i can to get away from him. I applied for a scholarship at a private svhool, blocked his calls but he keeps finding me. I have tried and tried but there is no getting rid of him

[FlyingTrue]

Tell your parents, teachers, school administrators, police, whoever, get a restraining order against him. You need this lunatic out of your life.

[Colt]

Originally Posted by miztwixbar

I have decided to do everything i can to get away from him. I applied for a scholarship at a private svhool, blocked his calls but he keeps finding me. I have tried and tried but there is no getting rid of him

I am glad to hear you are going to get away from this jerk.

If you want, you can let us know specifically how he is "finding" you, and we can suggest ideas on how you can deal with it.

Regards,

Colt