Was the first person you had intercourse with the same person you first sexually experimented at all with?

[Ambiance]

Hiii,

Well, my boyfriend and I have done everything but :P We had been planning on having sex for a while, then some issues came up, now things seem to be smoothing out, but I don't quite want to have sex until everything feels back in it's original place. And I guess I'm kind of worried about if it doesn't... because he's been the first guy I've done anything/everything else with, and I always thought that he would just be my first everything. Is it weird that I kind of feel like, even if things aren't going so well, I still want him to be my first actual sexual partner? Part of me is probably way too terrified of "being" with someone when I'm not in a secure relationship, but on the other hand, I guess I feel like... idk, like that bond that people have with their firsts has already been established? And then part of me is just horny. Roflmao.

Anyway, are what you guys' experiences and stuff with this? If the first person you had foreplay with is not the first person you had sex with, what are the different connections you do/don't feel like?

[Aletheia*]

No, the person I lost my virginity too was the first person I had slept with, but didn't do other sexual things with. My first boyfriend in high school was the first boyfriend I had actually experimented with sexually, and that was very long into the relationship (We dated around 10 months, and we didn't start doing anything sexually until 7-8 months into the relationship other than making out).

I did other sexual things with past boyfriends, but never felt a good connection enough with them to give them something that was dear to me. When I did find that person, I thought it over thoroughly before even attempting to bring it up in conversation. It was two months into the relationship when I lost my virginity to that person.

[reaching]

I kissed a couple of people before I had sex, but other than that I had no experience. The first boy I kissed was my best friends boyfriend. Its a complicated story, but she knows about it and understands. I still do feel a connection with him, but only because were close friends. After that, I kissed a couple of other boys that didnt matter. After I had sex for the first time I really thought I would be tied to him forever. Now, he really doesnt mean anything to me. The only guy I feel connected to is my current boyfriend, because I feel like in a better world I would have lost my virginity to him.

[ninegirl]

Hmm.. I did a lot of foreplay before my first sexual experience. When I did finally have it, I didn't care about the guy. I was pressured into it because I knew that's all he wanted. I felt pretty bad about it afterwards and broke up with him.

The second guy I had sex with, same thing. Then I realized a girl needs to be in love.. And cared for. There needs to be romance!

So my most recent ex, is the one I shared that with. And it was wonderful. Ultimately I made quite a few mistakes, but don't let anyone pressure you into anything .Do it when you feel comfortable, and only when you know in your heart you wish to do it. It can be confusing but it is worth it in the end.

[belle.darcy]

My first serious boyfriend was the one that took my virginity. Before him I had had a couple of boyfriends I barely kissed, let alone anything more.

However, a few months before I started dating my first, I had a one night stand with a friend of mine. Both of us kept our trousers on, but we did a lot of making out, dry humping etc. He was the first one to touch and kiss my breasts and the first one whose hard-on I felt.

So, basically, I had a bit of hands-on experience to help my enormous amount of theoretical knowledge, but I quite saved myself for my first. That being said, the first time we two ended completely naked together, was only two weeks into the relationship

[udontno]

The guy that I lost my virginity to (he was never my boyfriend) was my first everything, except kiss. I had kissed a couple of another people before we "got together" but I had never done anything sexual with anyone other than him. We touched all the bases before we got to home lol.

[Angel]

If things are a little rocky in your relationship right now and you feel as though you want to save this moment for later, then it probably is best to do so. Don't second guess yourself.

The first person I've had sex with is also the first person I've kissed. I haven't been "experimenting" with anyone else but him.

[Sincerely Yours ♥]

Originally Posted by Angel

If things are a little rocky in your relationship right now and you feel as though you want to save this moment for later, then it probably is best to do so. Don't second guess yourself.

This. You can have sex anytime. It doesn't hurt to wait a bit longer.

My last boyfriend was my first everything: first boyfriend, first kiss, first sexual experiences, first sex. I don't regret any of it, but I definitely enjoy all of it more with my current boyfriend. It's like, my boyfriend & I wish we were each others' firsts, but at the same time, it's nice to have something to compare to or at least know what you're doing.

[MacGuffin]

It's probably best not to try and have sex if things in your relationship are a little on the unstable side. While it's understandable that you would want your first sex partner to be the one you also did everything else with, it doesn't mean you should push to have sex with that person when the timing isn't right for it.

The first person I really experimented with was not the person I first had sex with. I didn't really experiment with anyone until after I'd had sex with three different people, so I was a little late into the experimentation game.

[ChaosControl]

My last boyfriend and I did sexual things, but not intercourse. I remember thinking I was very likely to have sex with him, but maybe that was because we'd taken things so much further than I'd previously experienced, and also because I was comfortable. We didn't stay together and we never had sex, and while I would advise you not to feel pressured to have sex with your boyfriend, I understand where you're coming from.

I would say that if you've done everything but sex, you're more likely to be ready for sex than if you haven't done those things. In my opinion, experimenting sexually is necessary before actual sex, but it differs for every person.

But... If you don't feel ready to have sex, or you feel the relationship isn't working, I'd say don't do it. Although you've done physical things to prepare yourself, that won't necessarily mean you're emotionally ready. If you don't do it with him, you may find that you are more prepared to do it with someone in the future, because you've experimented and know what to expect. There shouldn't be any pressure to have sex with this particular person. Only do it if you're abolutely sure.

Take care.

[Le bonheur*]

No. My ex boyfriend and I experimented a lot with sexual foreplay then had sex 8 months into the relationship. I'm uncomfortable with most forms of foreplay so my current boyfriend and I try to keep the foreplay to a limit.