Female Advice Preferred: No tampons = no sex?

[darkxdreamer13]

Okay, hi. This is super super awkward, but anyways.
I can't use tampons. :/ And I've tried numerous times. I've had my period for over three years and I still can't get the hang of it!
Any one else can't use them? Or am I just weird? Haha.

So I'm afraid that I won't be able to have or handle sex? :/

I was being fingered a couple weeks ago and everything was great but after a while I felt a little pain. I told him to be more gentle, and then all was fine, but still. I'm afraid that it's all related. You know?

Any advice? Thank you!
Sorry for such an awkward topic, lol.

[brokensmilexx]

If you can be fingered without it being excruciatingly painful you should be fine to have sex, and to put tampons in. But yes sometimes it is tricky!
It takes practice, are you using the ones with the pushy part on it? Or the tampons you insert just with your finger? A lot of women find the ones with the push part much easier to use, but for me it seemed to always push the tampon into a very uncomfortable position..sometimes it wouldn't even go in correctly, so I use the other kind.
As for having sex, it will be painful your first time don't get me wrong. But you are capable of doing it if you want.
<33

[MacGuffin]

Being comfortable with tampons is not a requirement for being able to have sex. While yes, technically, both things are insertable, you can have one without having the other. It's going to hurt a little the first time you use a tampon and it may or may not hurt when you have sex for the first time. No matter which situation you're in, the point is that the pain is temporary. There have been others who have been scared to have sex because of how they struggle with anything being inside of them, but I tell them what I am going to tell you: don't let that stop you from having sex. If it's something you are super worried about and just feel uncomfortable with the idea of it than don't do it at the time, but don't let it deter you from having it if you want to.

As for the use of tampons, everything from the kind you are using, to the thickness, to whether or not you use an applicator or just push it in with your finger, to even the material of the applicator or the smoothness of the cotton can influence your experience at first. I mean, when I first started using tampons, it took a while to get the hang of it. Even eight years later they can still go in awkwardly sometimes. It doesn't mean they aren't for you though. Personally I would recommend Playtex as a brand, or a brand with a plastic applicator. It's not what I use, but it's what has felt the easiest to get into place. And the instructions are always helpful.

If you don't want to try them again, though, then don't. Every girl has her preferences, and that's totally okay.

[Aletheia*]

As the above said, wearing tampons isn't a requirement to have sex. I didn't start using tampons until after I had sex for the first time. It's most likely that you're super tight down there. When you do decide to have sex, being comfortable and relaxed will help with the pain a bit. Being tense and unsure will make you uncomfortable, therefore making it hard to be penetrated. If you decide to try tampons again, read the instructions. It gives you several different ways to try inserting them. Also, make sure you aren't using a tampon that isn't too big for you. Try with a light or regular flow tampon. Don't go with the extra heavy ones, as those might be the cause of why you're feeling discomfort.

[bookishnerd]

Originally Posted by Zelophobia

It's most likely that you're super tight down there. .

That may be what's causing the pain. Sometimes if you "get to know yourself" it makes everything easier. After your body is acclimated to having things there, it hurts less.

[bookishnerd]

Originally Posted by Zelophobia

It's most likely that you're super tight down there.

That may be what's causing the pain. Sometimes if you "get to know yourself" it makes everything easier. After your body is acclimated to having things there, it hurts less.

[alice28]

I have a similar problem. But as said above, u can have sex without being able to use tampons. I didn't start using tampons until I'd started having sex because it was painful. However, now I am unable to use them again due to frequent thrush infections making it painful, which also makes fingering/sex painful at times too. But I doubt you will have this problem. It is probably that you are tight down there like it was for me. If the pain when being fingered is intense and long lasting, even after you have finished or you have to ask him to stop, then maybe you need to seek medical advice.

Hope this helps

[darkxdreamer13]

Thanks so much you guys, glad to know I'm not like, broken! Haha.
I'll probably try again for the tampons, maybe ones without the applicator?
(One kind I have tried is Playtex Sport, which I think are on the smaller side and do have a plastic applicator.)
And as for the sex, I don't plan on it too soon anyways, but I just wondered.
Thanks again.

[Aletheia*]

If I'm not mistaken, all tampons come with an applicator. The point of those is to help get them inserted. Stay away from the cardboard applicators, as those could make it difficult to insert. Try putting a little lube on the plastic applicator to help ease inside a little better. And, like I said, the directions on the tampon can give you some easier ways of getting it in there. You should never feel a tampon once it's inside. If you do, then it was inserted wrong.

[The Morrigan]

Originally Posted by Zelophobia

If I'm not mistaken, all tampons come with an applicator. .

Nope, not all. At least not some versions in the UK, not sure about the US

Anyway, I was basically like you. I couldn't get tampons in, I found it hard to have penetrative masturbation etc. but I went ahead and had sex and it didn't hurt as much as I was expecting so I'm sure you'll be fine too. Just make sure that when you do have sex that your partner is gentle and you communicate, let him know if it hurts too much.