we can't get it in

[natcat]

My boyfriend and I recently tried having sex for the first time (my first time, not his) and we could just not get his penis to fit. He's not exceptionally large by any means, and he was fully erect. I was also extremely wet. We didn't have any lube because we hadn't really planned on having sex that night haha. But we just couldn't get it in I felt I was relaxed and ready and wanted it to happen, but we just couldn't.

I went out and bought a dildo, to see if I could maybe get it in myself first and make it easier/more successful the second time around. I feel more comfortable trying to do it myself for the first time anyways because I felt pretty embarrassed that we couldn't (yeah yeah I know I shouldn't be). I've tried to put it in, but I really can't get farther than 2 inches or so and I just can't push it in any farther haha it's not even from pain, it just refuses to go. I don't know if I'm inserting it wrong or what, but any help would be appreciated. (I've been using lube and lots of it haah)

[GCCBrian]

Well, not to butt in on this, but i'd recommend seeing your doctor about this. If you're with Kaiser I know you can contact them online, and they can give you some advice on what to do, or maybe call you in for an appointment to see what's wrong. Maybe it can be something medically? I don't know, but if I were a girl, and this was happening to me i'd defiantly get this checked out, as it could be a serious issue.

[Aletheia*]

This isn't something you visit the doctor for! This is normal; I also had a hard time my first time having sex as well, and even to this day, it's a little painful and takes a bit of time! Nothing to worry or stress over!

You're probably just exceptionally tiny down there, as I am. Lots of foreplay, lube and relaxation will help. As will practice. It might take a few tries, but that doesn't mean you need to give up. Foreplay will help loosen the muscles, lube will help make sure that it goes smoothly, and relaxation will also help loosen the muscles. Nothing to be embarrassed over, and nothing to worry a doctor about!

[roller♥coaster]

Actually, there are medical issues that have these kinds of symptoms, like vaginismus, which can require both psychological and medical assistance to conquer. I think there are a LOT of other things you should try before you see a doctor, however, and I wouldn't be too worried about it if I were you. Just wanted to bring that to attention.

[Pelios]

Originally Posted by natcat

My boyfriend and I recently tried having sex for the first time (my first time, not his) and we could just not get his penis to fit. He's not exceptionally large by any means, and he was fully erect. I was also extremely wet. We didn't have any lube because we hadn't really planned on having sex that night haha. But we just couldn't get it in I felt I was relaxed and ready and wanted it to happen, but we just couldn't.

I went out and bought a dildo, to see if I could maybe get it in myself first and make it easier/more successful the second time around. I feel more comfortable trying to do it myself for the first time anyways because I felt pretty embarrassed that we couldn't (yeah yeah I know I shouldn't be). I've tried to put it in, but I really can't get farther than 2 inches or so and I just can't push it in any farther haha it's not even from pain, it just refuses to go. I don't know if I'm inserting it wrong or what, but any help would be appreciated. (I've been using lube and lots of it haah)

Don't worry it usually happens when it is your first time, your experience sounds a lot like mine what we did is we went to get the "ky jelly" and some very thin condoms and that helped. I would recommend you to go buy the ky jelly and kept it close so next time even if you don't plan it you will have it handy.
Good Luck.!

[Revolution]

Lube, lube, lube. It makes things so much smoother, and will really help. This is actually a common occurrence, and happened to me the first few times as well. The dildo was a good bet too. I would just keep trying it, and try to go farther each time. This will help you get more comfortable with doing it. Think about it, before this, you probably had only put a tampon up there, and those are fairly small compared to a penis. If this continues the next few times in intercourse, you might want to see your gynecologist or give them a call, but I wouldn't worry about it until then.

[Jennyjenn1]

If your arroused and wet I don't think you need lube but it sure couldn't hurt.
Also the dildo is a good idea it hopefully is a comparable size to b/f and nothing over done.

I don't have penetration often but never had that trouble. 2inches in sounds about where a hymen should be but unless you have the thickest one of all time it should have broken. You might want to take a look at yourself in mirror and see if you can tell if its been broken for sure.

Other than that relax and keep practicing cause it will happen sooner or later

[Sincerely Yours ♥]

This is totally normal. The first time I had sex, it took like a half hour to get it in, then for each day after that, it took a while to still get it in. It happens. It takes practice, but you will get it eventually.

[MacGuffin]

What's occurring is perfectly normal. The thing is, the vagina is a muscle. And like any other muscle, if it isn't used for extended periods of time, it gets tight and takes more effort to make it work with the same ease as before. Muscles always do best when they've been stretched, and the more you stretch them the easier they are to work.

Your vagina has not encountered anything as big a penis before, even a penis that isn't incredibly large. It's no surprise that you are having trouble with him fitting. It may take some time and a little bit of ease to make sex easier for you both.

I would suggest continuing using the dildo. They are great for stretching the vaginal muscles yet, and make excellent practice since they don't have the complications of a real penis (like possibly losing hardness, for example). Be sure there is lots of foreplay if you can. It also helps to do it in a place where you know you have privacy and won't be disturbed, as well. On top of all that, do not force whichever phallic object you are encountering. Just take it slowly, don't get frustrated, and work with it. The more you work on it, the easier it should be.