Not being turned on.

[emmaflorence]

Okay, this is quite personal, but I'm a bit concerned, so I am just going to say it. I am slightly worried that I am never going to find someone who can make me orgasm. I am not a virgin, but my only sexual encounters have been disappointing, where I don't finish, but the guy I am with does. Most of my sexual experiences have been while just slightly intoxicated. I feel turned on when it comes to kissing, but I don't know whether my inhibitions take over, I don't seem to get turned on when it goes any further. I'm really scared that I'm a freak, and I will have to fake my orgasms with a partner. Am I a freak?

[George^^]

No, your not a freak, but you just haven't had someone do the right things. ^^' maybe your just hard to turn on sexually.

[DeadlySin]

You're hardly a freak. =) I have never once orgasmed with any of my partners. Not through actual sex, or oral. I know I am just difficult and require self stimulation only. It's not uncommon for females to be unable to orgasm from just sex ect. Yes your meds and being intoxicated could be a factor as well. If it's really bothering you/concerning you, you could always speak to your doctor about it. Good luck!

[Boston]

You're not a freak at all. Seriously. SO many women have the same exact problem. There are SO many reasons for it too. Sex is way more emotional for a women and it takes us more to feel comfortable with a guy. AND every women is different. I mean without being graphic, it doesn't take much for any guy to get off, it's much more difficult for a women. Also if you haven't been close with the guys you've hooked up with then that doesn't help matters. I've never gotten off from sex with anyone, it's tough for a lot of women. Apparently it gets better in your 30's or something, but I'm 23 and still struggle with it. It's not all about physical attraction tho. There are a number of factors such as the guys experience, how much foreplay you have, how well you know the guy/how well he knows you/your/body, how emotionally close you feel to him... I've actually never gotten off with someone I wasn't dating. Too difficult for me to relax and feel comfortable. I've also pretty much never been able to get off when drinking. I think it will be better for you when you find someone you're truly comfortable with who cares about pleasing you and puts effort into it.

[Aletheia*]

You're not alone. MANY woman have the same issue as you, and as someone mentioned, there are many reasons for it. However, you should be aware that only a certain amount of woman can orgasm through intercourse alone. Many woman need extra stimulation, like clitoral stimulation during sex to help to get to that point. Some woman may never experience an orgasm in their lifetime.

I'd suggest trying to get yourself to that point alone, during masturbation. You can't force it. You need to let it come on it's own, and if you need extra stimulation, there is nothing wrong with that.

[Squiggly]

You are not a freak . I had a similar problem when I first started with my fiance. Even now I don't always "finish" sometimes I do and sometimes I don't it's just normal. It could just be that you need a little more stimulation.