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-   -   Age you got pregnant? Plus questions. (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f7-pregnancy-childcare/t38856-age-you-got-pregnant-plus-questions/)

MermaidMassacre March 5th 2010 01:43 PM

Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
I posted in one of the threads that got me thinking.

My hormones are kicking in so the baby topic always comes about around this time. =P

So the questions are:
(Oh and of course younger fathers are welcome to answer, i'd love to get both sides and opinions!)
How old were you when you got pregnant/became a parent?
And then do you regret it?
How long do you wish you waited?

I'm asking this because, as you can see to the left i'm 17, but of course I have the thoughts that I want a baby!
Like now!
I know its not reasonable and I really really should wait and I plan too.
It's just I see these other girls around my age getting pregnant (accidently) and either they are really happy, but of course stressing out a bit, but they can handle it.
Then there are others I see that aren't doing so good, and I think, I could do better? I could totally handle that.

So my little thoughts are the second I graduate and get a stable job, then ship my boyfriend over from England, I want a baby.
So my guess is i'll be around 21?
My mom says that's rushing it.
But I just wanna baby!
So if I can support one and am ready for one (at least I think I will be at that time.) Why not?

Thanks for any responses. =)

Jocelyn. March 5th 2010 03:03 PM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
I was 21 when I got pregnant. I do not regret having my son... but I should have waited, no doubt about it. I know everyone says this... but if I could have the exact same baby, only 5 years later, I'd do that! lol. I had him toooo early. No matter how ready, prepared, stable, you think you are... the longer you wait the better!!!!!

I feel that finances play a major major role in your decision to have a child. The only reason my boyfriend and I get by is because he went to college and was able to get great paying job... Even then, we still have our moments where we struggle and we wonder how we'll make it several years down the road. If I was on my own, there would be no way. I'd be living at home relying on family to support me. I'd be miserable.

Also, don't think for a second having a baby with make an existing relationship better. I never fought with my boyfriend until I had my son. A lot of stress and exhaustion has been created and it puts a huge strain on our relationship. There have been multiple times where I thought we were over. I never had that thought previously.

Having a child does put a joy and love in your heart that is indescribable. I would do anything for him, no matter how crazy he drives me (and some days its very crazy :p). They cry, and whine, and want all of your attention all day long. Most of the time I can't even pee without hearing him whimper in the other room. They get upset and sometimes there is nothing you can do to calm them down. No one fights sleep better than a baby. My son takes hours of whining to get to sleep for the night sometimes. Oh and not to mention he just started sleeping through the night. My son woke up every 2-3 hours for three months, he went to bed at 11 and was up for the day again at 6 (while still waking up to eat in between). Its eeexxxhhhaaauusssttiiinnggg. No joke.

So, yeah, babies are wonderful and great and a miracle! They have there many many hard moments, but they also have their moments where they do amazing things that make your heart melt and make it all worth it.

Buuut, dont rush please! You have many many years to experience it. The more prepared you are, the less stress you will have. The part that makes being a parent so hard for me is I have too many things to stress over. I couldnt even imagine doing it on no income and with a man who ended up not being there to support me.

iHEAVENn March 5th 2010 07:28 PM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
-I was 19 when I got pregnant. 20 when I gave birth to my son
-No, my son has taught me so much in the short years I've had him. He's opened up a part of me, and helped me realize the only important thing in life is family.
-I don't wish I waited. At the time I got pregnant I was going by "Whatever happens, happens" I know my son was meant to be here, and I'm thankful every day that I'm the one he gets to call mommy. My husband and I live a comfortable life, that most of people our age don't understand. (my brother can't wrap his head around the fact that we don't have cable t.v. or reliable car)
Our son has taught us so much these past two years and he is and always will be the reason we do everything. The choices we make, where we live, etc all because of him.

vikki March 5th 2010 08:33 PM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
i was 16 when i got pregnant found out a month later when i turned 17 that i was really pregnant and was 17 when i gave birth no i dont regret having my son and YES i should have waited but if it wasnt for my son i wouldnt have grown up i love my life now and now i have my daughter i had her when i was 18 and my youngest now 20 i wouldnt change a thing about it

PhoenixAlive March 6th 2010 01:19 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
I was 18 when I conceived and 19 when I gave birth to my daughter. I do regret that it happened when and how it did, but I love her more than anything or anyone else in the world, and I would never change it now even if I could.

My husband and I are very tight on money and we can't go out for a date more than once a month, but we never expected any different and somehow we still find time to be together.

One thing that is a bit of a downside to getting married and having a child so young is that we don't have much in common with our group of friends anymore. We see them on occasion, but they are at a completely different stage of life than us now, and its created a... almost a language barrier of sorts? If that makes sense.

But please don't rush into anything. Having a baby is wonderful, but it will completely change your life, and unless you have the means to financially and emotionally support yourself and your baby, it can be very, very hard.

Nicolette March 6th 2010 01:57 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
I'm 25 and pregnant, my husband and I waited until we owned our own house and were financially able to afford having a baby. We pretty much took every step that you can into planning a pregnancy, we both started getting into shape, eating healthy and making sure we were healthy, I got off bc and onto prenatal and then we tried for it. After only a few weeks we found out we were pregnant. I think its the perfect time in both of our lives to start a family since we're both well prepared.

holyz March 6th 2010 02:01 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
I was 17 when my ex became pregnant
I regretted it at a time but I have became very excited to become a father
I wish i would of waited until i was married and has a stable job


Yea me and my ex talked about babys a lot when we were dating and before she got pregnant. It was more talking about 'down the road' and talking about how it would be nice some day. But that's probably what contributed to her getting pregnant. Us both thinking about it and not being as safe as we should of. After her pregnancy hormones kicked in and a few other things happen she left me. A lot of stress and heart ache. We are talking things out now and working on getting back together but i would say to wait. Yes we both are very happy and very excited to be parents but we went trough a lot more than we should have to get here because we didnt wait.

topov March 6th 2010 10:55 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
Im 22 and 30 weeks pregnant XD
Im so excited, elated and every other happy word you could find, but I do sometimes wish we had waited.
In no way do I regret getting pregnant, I love every second of it, and cant wait to meet my baby. but me and my partner are in a really sticky situation.

We both live in his mothers house... well in a bedroom at his mothers... and we dont get to leave often... and are really struggling to get a house sorted. We're also trying to plan our wedding, and have so many other things going on all at once... sometimes I cant help but think maybe I would have been better off waiting.

Saying that, I cant imagine anything else right now, and although it might have been a better idea to wait, I wouldnt change anything!!

J&M's Mommy March 9th 2010 03:39 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
How old were you when you got pregnant/became a parent? 19; 20 when I gave birth.
And then do you regret it? I cannot say I regret it, because my son is amazing. But sometimes I find myself thinkg, oh what if?

How long do you wish you waited? I may have waited just a couple more years, or atleast until I was done with college.

guillotine_blades March 10th 2010 04:19 PM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
i was 18 when i got pregnant, 19 when I had him. I don't regret him at all. But I do wish I would have waited awhile.

abandoning March 11th 2010 08:24 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
How old were you when you got pregnant/became a parent? 17; 18 now

And then do you regret it? No way. I can't wait for my daughter

How long do you wish you waited? wish it had been with a man a truly loved. and was able to provide for myself.

Nope March 13th 2010 02:12 AM

Re: Age you got pregnant? Plus questions.
 
How old were you when you got pregnant/became a parent?
I am 16 and I'm currently pregnant.
And then do you regret it?
How could I? It was beyond my control. But at first I wished I had never been raped and that the baby would just disappear. Now I'm happy I'm pregnant but I wish it would have been on my terms.
How long do you wish you waited?
Until I was married.


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