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Pregnancy and Childcare If you're pregnant, a young parent, or have questions related to either, ask them here!

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  (#41 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 08:26 AM

I don't support abortions. But i will support you because i feel like this is the right thing for YOU. You are 16 and have your whole life ahead of you. I wish you so much luck




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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 08:27 AM

Good luck on Tuesday. I know everything will work out for you and you'll be fine.
You're a strong girl. You can do it. <3
If you need someone to talk to at any time, please don't hesitate to PM me.
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 07:03 PM

Thank you for your comments ~ They've made me feel better about Tuesday.

Although I spent 3 hours crying on Wednesday :|


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 07:12 PM

awwwwwwww We're all here for you if you ever need to talk


There's always light at the end of a tunnel, even if you have to pass a few bends to see it.



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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 07:14 PM

Thank you so so much!!! xxx


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 07:15 PM

It's what we're here for sweetie =)



There's always light at the end of a tunnel, even if you have to pass a few bends to see it.



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  (#47 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 26th 2010, 07:31 PM

I'm against abortion myself, but like most people have said, it's your decision. After all, this is something you created yourself. Make sure to be more protective and aware. Whatever happens, I also wish the best for you. As for me, I'm always trying to be careful when it comes to my sex life. You aren't alone and i'm sure you'll have supporters along the way. Good luck! (:
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 12:09 AM

I really think that the father should at least know that you're carrying his child before you abort him/her. I mean, I think it's just the right thing to do... to let him know.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 05:12 PM

It's good that you are confident with your decision, good luck on Tuesday.

As for the father, since he's out of the country I'm assumming you can't reach him, which isn't your fault and you certainly shouldn't have to wait until he get's back. Since he probably has no way of knowing you are pregnant before you have the procedure done, I'm not sure telling him once he get's back would be a good thing. Especially if you think he would have wanted you to keep the baby or something. That's my opinion on that part.


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  (#50 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 05:18 PM

Just told the father. over facebook but still. He says as he is away so much of the time, he supports my decision, as it wouldn't be fair as I couldn't cope by myself. Shame he can't be with me Tuesday. But when he gets back he says he'll give me all the support I need.

Thanks for support, and I'm surprised I had the courage to tell him!


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 05:25 PM

Well done for telling him, and I'm glad he's supporting your decision


There's always light at the end of a tunnel, even if you have to pass a few bends to see it.



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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 09:04 PM

I'm really glad you spoke with him, it was very brave and mature of you. I'm sorry you're in this position, but am glad you and the father could agree on what's best for you. I hope everything goes well Tuesday and we're always here at TH if you need us.

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  (#53 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 09:10 PM

Thank you AGAIN for the replies I love you all!

I am glad you all support my decision. Makes me very happy to have such an amazing bunch of people support me. I am dead nervous and scared, but all your replies have comforted me and made my decision much easier to accept. Although I know after I won't feel terrific, it makes me so glad that I know I can come here and share my thoughts and feelings with you all. I'll let you all know how Tuesday goes for me, I'm sure I'll need plenty of hugs!



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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 27th 2010, 10:41 PM

I'm sure it'll be fine sweetie, and we're all here for you if you ever want to talk about it


There's always light at the end of a tunnel, even if you have to pass a few bends to see it.



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  (#55 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 28th 2010, 03:41 PM

So much for support. He just broke up with me.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 28th 2010, 05:03 PM

Why did he break up with you? Because of your decision or ?
  (#57 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 28th 2010, 05:29 PM

Quote:
So much for support. He just broke up with me.
Well, I'm with everyone on TH with the fact that he should be aware of the pregnancy and what you intend to do. You said he supported you earlier... These things happen though. I was in the same boat... Brandon supported me through the abortion and two months after, we broke up because of it. He ended up not being able to deal with it and that being the issue.
Are you guys talking at all? Did he tell you the reasons for the break up? I know that for awhile, Brandon didn't want to get back together with me; he kind of blocked all his feelings out... but it's been three months apart from each other and we're finally working things out together.

If you want to see if you can reconcile things with him, I'd talk to him and see what he has to say about how he feels and why he made this decision. Give him time to accept what you told him and what's happening - it seems rushed of him to do this, especially when he gave you his full support earlier. After he has awhile to accept it, you could maybe see if he'll try to work though the grieving or try some sort of counseling.
I had to badger Brandon about counseling for three months, but he's finally willing to try and do it one on one, using that workbook that I provided a link for in my first post. It honestly helped me and you have to realize that it's hard for the man as well... It affects them and it's similar, but different from how women feel. Some places have post-abortion counseling specifically for the men because there is a difference in grieving and feelings for them.
I'd just give him time to come around to what all is happening and if you want him back, talk to him after that... see if you can't ease back into the relationship.

If it's abortion-related, what me and Brandon have found to help is to remind ourselves WHY we couldn't have our kid. We tell ourselves that I wouldn't have been able to graduate high school and go to college, we wouldn't have any money to move into an apartment together next year, etc, etc. And then we remind ourselves that that's why we gave it up and we'll correct those problems and when those issues are resolved, we'll have one that will have the life it deserves. It tends to keep us sane and reminds us that we did make the best decision...

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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 28th 2010, 05:36 PM

We've only been together for 1 month. He said things are happening to fast and he can't deal with it. So he broke up with me. He said we'll speak when he gets back, and maybe we'll end up back together. But I doubt we will. I just think it was the shock of he actually got me pregnant. -___-

Thanks for your replies.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 05:52 PM

Darling, I'm so sorry If when he gets back, you'd like to give it another go, then try to talk things over with him, but it's probably a sign that it wasn't meant to be (that sounds so cheesy ) I know I've said this so many times before, but if you ever want to chat, I'm here for you


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 06:09 PM

Maybe it wasn't, Maybe you're right.. :l Ouch. All this is just too much. -___-
Its Tuesday TOMORROW I have a feeling it's going to be a sleepless night tonight.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 06:11 PM

Good luck with it, and just remember, you can post here anytime, and we'll be here to support you


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 08:30 PM

Thank you Jessy, for your continous support. Omg, can't believe it.. so scared.. and I have to go alone my friend cant accompany me anymore. Eurgh. -___-


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 08:32 PM

Have you talked to your parents about it. i know if i were in your situation, I'd want my mum with me to hold my hand. Maybe if you don't think it's too babyish, you could take a favourite teddy or something with you? You've got every right to be nervous about it, but i'm sure it'll go fine, and we're all going to be thinking of you


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 08:49 PM

I'm not sure how it works where you are, but I believe that here you aren't able to drive yourself home after the procedure. You may want to call the clinic and check on that before you get there.

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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 08:59 PM

Jessy - I haven't. I don't plan too. I daren't. My dad would go MAAAD! I dont really have a favourite teddy, I was thinking of just taking my mp3 and listening to some happy music to cheer me up.. I just want someone to hold my hand

Megan - That's a good point actually. I mean I could always ask my dad to pick me up, he knows I'll be at the hospital, just he thinks I'm with a friend. But I'll check tomorrow morning.

Thank you both.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 09:07 PM

Hey, I'm sorry i couldn't read this sooner so i could comment. I want you to know that you are so brave and I completely support you, the decision, as you know is a very difficult decision to make, if I was in your position abortion personally wouldn't be my choice but you made the best decision for you and I think that's so great! You have my support any day! Best of luck tomorrow, I hope everything goes well, if you ever want to talk I am a great listener, Pm me anytime!
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 09:13 PM

Thank you so much Jess. Makes me so happy that you support me.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 09:28 PM

Quote:
Jessy - I haven't. I don't plan too. I daren't. My dad would go MAAAD! I dont really have a favourite teddy, I was thinking of just taking my mp3 and listening to some happy music to cheer me up.. I just want someone to hold my hand

Megan - That's a good point actually. I mean I could always ask my dad to pick me up, he knows I'll be at the hospital, just he thinks I'm with a friend. But I'll check tomorrow morning.

Thank you both.
I just wanted to throw in that if you feel like you need someone to be in the room with you or support you while you do it, I'm sure you could ask someone to. I know where I went, it's slightly different since it wasn't a hospital and all... but there were people that worked there that offered to go in with you if you needed support. I'm sure a nurse would be willing to comfort you if you need it. My mom is a nurse that used to work in a hospital. She used to hold people's hands through rough stuff like this all the time. Most don't mind it at all.

As for driving, assuming you're only taking the first pill and they're giving you the second pills for you to take at home, you'll be able to drive yourself home. All the first pill does is stop progesterone - which essentially stops the growth of the fetus. When you take the second pills, I wouldn't try driving however.

As much as you said your father will be mad, I'd still think about telling him. If you intend to be around him while you do this, it's going to be hard to hide that something is wrong. I guess you could tell him that you have food poisoning or something - that's what I told my father and he believed it. But it's always nice to have someone close to you know what you're going through and support you.. I was scared to death to tell my mother and, yeah, she was angry at me for a bit, but when it came down to it and I needed her, she was there to hold my hand and tell me comforting words. Maybe your father will be the same way? He might get mad, but at the end of the day, you're still his daughter. But, then again, I don't know your relationship with him. I wouldn't dare tell my father because we're not close at all.
But I think you should consider telling someone who can support you though, if your friend can't be there and all.

Last edited by dejaentendu0; November 29th 2010 at 09:33 PM.
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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 09:42 PM

I was actually talking to my friend just now. and I intend to tell my mum tomorrow on the way to college. She might be able to come to the hospital with me and hold my hand, as I DO need that support. And I am taking the pills home with me. So, I am going to play the food poisoning card. And I know she won't tell my dad. Or atleast she might not. But I know she'll be there for me.

Thank you.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 29th 2010, 10:20 PM

I'm glad you'll have someone there with you. I wish you all the best for tomorrow. It won't be easy but it will all work out OK in the end. Just keep telling yourself you're going to be fine and think positive and know you made the right decision for you. Loads of love and hugs, I'll be thinking of you tomorrow




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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 30th 2010, 01:23 PM

I'm sure that once your mother gets over the initial shock, she'll be completely supportive of you. Best of luck, you're in our thoughts right now


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 30th 2010, 04:43 PM

Thanks. Although I didn't end up telling her and I couldnt go because of the snow. It would have took me 2 hours to get to college which is about 6 miles away, the hospital is atleast 12 miles away so.. :/ Rescheduled for the 9th Dec, and my ex has said he'll probably come with me. Just hoping he won't turn his back again.


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Re: I'm Pregnant. - November 30th 2010, 11:15 PM

Awww. It's okay. Things will work out. If I could put 100 virtual hugs on this thing without my hands getting tired I would so I'll stick with six. Multiply them if you want.



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