in this day and age would you get an abortion in this case?

[girlfromsocal]

I'm curious. I just wanna know. I like questions like these. Anyway you're a teen mom who will be 20 almost before the baby was born. She's at a temporary job. The guy is a drunk mildly mentally disabled. He's in his upper 20's still living with his parents only a few months before he met his demise he was put in a dangerous environment. He had a son before her and didn't take care of that child. She had lived with her parents. She lives on government assistance. Well her mom is on government assistance. And was one of the first things her mom talked about when she said she was pregnant.. She has deep maternal instincts though. She was patient with her nephew at a collicky allergic stage when she was 16. Her sister would get drunk and inpatient. She's been a very good aunt to her nephew who is at this point 3 years old. Anyway she breaks uop with the guy before she fidns out she's pregnant. She goes to get birth control when she finds out she's pregnant. And is later on told that the child is handicap. And would need medical intervention to walk if it ever learned how to walk. But no mental or life threatening issues were detected. Her family did wish that she'd abort. Around that time it was found iut her ex was murdered. Anyway would you say this is a good reason to abort due to being young financial trouble poor prenatal diagnosis and due to lack of a father figure but only due to death which is different from abandonement to the child. Would you say abortion is a good idea? Do adoption agencies even place children with physical disabilities? On the other hand she could be a good mom with fine intuned maternal instincts. She also has no morning sickness but is very visibly pregnant because she was so small her body had to prepare more and had gained [Edited by Kitty.] already. Which she started out at [Edited by Kitty.] so for people who knew her right away knew she was pregnant. So it's not her private thing you know. Anyway what do you think abortion parenting or adoption?

[Le bonheur*]

This is a tough scenario to answer but I'll answer it the best that I possibly can.

If I was pregnant with a child who may never be able to walk, and my boyfriend was murdered, I'd probably at least consider abortion and adoption. However, I don't think I'd actually go through with it. Ultimately, it's my baby, my responsibility, and something that I'd have to deal with. I'd love that baby unconditionally and accept the fact that they'd never be able to walk, or walk with difficulties, because it is something a mother should do. Something I feel very strongly about because I feel like no child should be abandoned no matter what mental or physical problems they may have from birth to death.

Though I do know that some women would abandon their child and I respect that completely because I do know that somethings are just better left in the hands of someone else who CAN handle a situation like the one mentioned. I know that if someone did put up a child for adoption that had physical or mental disabilities I would adopt that child because every single child deserves a home and a family.

There's my 2 cents.

[_sunsets64.]

I don't know, this really is tough. But ultimately, if the woman thought she could provide well for the baby, I'd say no to abortion. Like, if it was me, and I knew that I could make my financial situation improve (because the medical expenses for the baby/kid/teen are crazy expensive, not to mention the extra because of the not-being-able-to-walk thing), and I knew that I could provide a reasonably good life for the baby, then I would keep it. But, if I knew that my situation probably wouldn't improve and the baby would be subjected to a miserable life, then I don't know if I'd want to put the baby through that. It's difficult to say though, because I've never been in the position of potentially being a mom, but from an attempt at a logical standpoint, this is my opinion.

[Ambiance]

My plan has always been to avoid pregnancy in the first place. But to someone who was IN that situation.. I wouldn't judge them if they did choose to abort.

[escape_thereal_world]

I don't know if all agencies do, but there are some that I know who will take disabled babies and put them up for adoption. Honestly though, it is very much less likely they will be adopted though

As for abortion...If the child can't walk but is otherwise healthy, then I would never abort or put up for adoption. Also, often times the doctors do not know for SURE if their diagnosis will be true once the baby is born and put through physical therapy. Starting at a young age can definitely impact if the treatments help or not.

Take for example. My friend had a baby who had to get a tracheotomy. She was told that due to the air obstruction in the womb (he had been strangled by the umbilical cord) that he may have mental disabilities. They strongly suggested that she give him up for adoption because she was only 19 and his treatments would get expensive.

She denied. So now he is 6 years old and perfectly normal. He no longer has the trach and is no different than any other little boy.

So...it is definitely up to the person and what they think they can handle, as well as if the doctors are 100% sure or not.

[Aletheia*]

If the only thing wrong with the child was that it needed medical intervention to walk, I'd never abort or put him/her up for adoption. Children with disabilities don't have a great chance of being adopted, since a parent would want a child who they deemed 'perfect'. However, I'd never abort or adopt anyway. Abortions scare me, and though I'm pro-choice, for myself, I'm pro-life. The only way I'd abort a child is if it was putting my life in danger, or the babies life was in danger. In this case, the child's life isn't in any danger. They would just need some extra assistance in walking. Though, if I were on government assistance to help get through life, the decision becomes a little bit harder. Though, I don't think I'd abort or put him/her up for adoption even then. I would do everything possible to help my child walk, even if it meant being a stripper for a living. I'd do anything for my child. As for adoption, I couldn't give my flesh and blood away to a family I don't even know. Yes, you get to know the family before you give your baby to them, but you still really don't know them. If that makes any sense.

There is a law called the Safe Haven Law, where you could leave a child at a fire department and have no legal rights to the child. Though, they'd be put into the system and would then have to wait to be adopted, which may never happen.

[MacGuffin]

First of all, keep in mind that what anyone says in this thread is THEIR opinion and their opinion only. None of these statements are meant to be taken as fact, or as what the mother should do. Keep in mind (even though this is a false scenario) that the mother's choice should be her own.

First of all, putting her baby up for adoption is going to be a difficult decision due to the fact that the baby has a disability. However, it could be done if the baby were given over to special needs foster parents or a special needs foster home. There are such things, and they can be easily researched on the internet. This may be a really great option due to the fact that it is unlikely the mother will ever be able to fully take on the baby's medical expenses, even with government assistance. Medicare only covers so much of one's hospital bills, not to mention doctor's visits, various exams and tests, etc. This actually may be the best option, for otherwise the quality of life may be limited for not only the baby but the mother as well.

I actually hold a neutral stance on this, but I personally would not opt to abort the baby. The birth defect isn't life threatening and (if treated) won't really reduce the quality of life, so I see no reason to choose that option. Especially because birth defects cannot be detected until the eleventh week, and an abortion should really take place before the twelfth week. After that it becomes dangerous for the mother to have one.

She could raise the baby, but keep in mind that is not going to be an easy road. The least of that all being medical expenses to try and help the baby be able to walk. She would most likely be stuck with dead end, menial jobs the rest of her life on government assistance, underpaid with little or no insurance, rarely at home to be with her own child because she'll probably have to work two or more jobs to make ends meet, have no time for anything but her baby, which includes having little time to relax or sleep, and being very unlikely to have a stable partner come into her life (at least not for a long time) because the baby is a special needs child. Basically, that route will deprive both herself and that child of a decent life.

I would put the baby up for adoption with a special needs set of parents. There are agencies that could connect the mother with those resources, and it would keep the baby out of the state system. Plus, the baby could get the care it needed from parents who have the time and means to provide for it.

But that's just my two cents.

[loganemmy]

In my opinion she should keep the baby. Even if the baby is going to have a very difficult life, the baby still deserves to live. Everything that happens in the mothers life should not stop the baby from living. Or she could give the baby up for adoption if she does not feel fit to care for him/her. I just don't think she should abort the baby.