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LGBT, Sexuality and Gender Identity Whether you're LGBT, questioning, have gender identity issues, or have entirely unrelated feelings, this forum is here to help.

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I want to talk about this - November 15th 2019, 03:18 AM

Been reading some of the posts on here and I want to add my 2 cents.

My best friend is VERY bi-sexual. She is super super good on not going against limits and she is just an all around wonderful person.

So, I will say (can't believe I am typing this out) that we have made out a couple times. First time for me was freaky and scary and the second time was freaky and scary and nice and scary again. And i'll add that for our first time we were watching the movie Into The Forest with Ellen Page, we just never had the time on watching the end of it, LOL!!!

She is and always will be my best friend, but at the same time I just don't know what to think about THIS stuff. Nobody knows about it and we hang out 95% of the time and never even talk about it. I think if a 3rd time happens I would be okay with it, but I am still on the fence about it.

I don't know why I am posting this but I just wanted to speak my mind about my experience.
   
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Re: I want to talk about this - November 15th 2019, 03:03 PM

I don't think it means anything to be honest. Sounds like you two are very close and your friend might be bisexual, but it sounds to me like you're bicurious or just goofing around. If it's something you seriously want to pursue, then I would suggest talking to your friend about this or someone else. Or, alternatively, you can reach out to us for support.


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Re: I want to talk about this - November 16th 2019, 04:32 AM

Hi,

I do agree with what Jen said that it may just be something you're doing for fun or for curiosity, and that's okay! You don't have to force yourself to put a label on anything (your relationship, your sexuality, etc) if you don't want to. It's also okay if nobody knows about it. If you two decide to tell people later that's fine, but if not it can just be a personal thing.

But, if you're confused on what everything means, I think that sitting down and talking to her may help. I know you said that even though you two hang around a lot you don't talk about it much, but it may help if both of you are on the same page so there aren't any mixed signals. You can let her know that you had found it nice when you made out, but you are a little bit confused on if it means anything and just want to make sure you are both on the same page.

If it does happen again, it's okay if you decide to say no. Remember that even though you two have made out before, you definitely don't have to do it again if you decide it's not for you. You said that she's really good on respecting limits, so as long as you politely let her know that you don't want to do it, it should be okay. It doesn't make you a bad person if you decide you don't want to. And, if you do want to make out again, that's okay too! You should enjoy it if you want to.

So basically there's no shame and as long as you are comfortable with it, it's fine if you to make out, or if it's fine if you stop. You don't have to worry about assigning any labels to it if you don't want to.

Best of luck!
Dez


   
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Re: I want to talk about this - November 16th 2019, 02:21 PM

I wanted to add that I agree with what Dez (Hypothesis.) has said. It's important that you communicate with your friend, especially if you are feeling confused by it right now. As you said, she is bisexual and you are not sure what to identify as. Make it clear to her that you care about her as your best friend, but you are not sure about taking it any further than that. If you ever start feeling uncomfortable, IT'S OK TO SAY NO! Even if she is your best friend and you've consented in the past; we all are allowed to change our minds and feelings on something.

If you need to reach out again, we are here to help! Best of luck.


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Re: I want to talk about this - November 17th 2019, 03:34 AM

thankyou for the responses.

How this all started is because of a movie and we were talking about boys and eventually she taught me how to kiss and we just enjoyed doing it together. Done it a few times since then but it's all goofing around on my end and she knows this. She has of course tries to go a little beyond it but it all ends in a playful way and everything is okay.
Maybe one day i'll go farther. I don't know. but I am happy with the simply uncommon kissing. I am comfortable with it...for the most part, lol!
   
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Re: I want to talk about this - November 18th 2019, 11:16 PM

Sounds like your friend might be getting a bit carried away with the playfulness, but glad to hear she stops at the right time!

You have plenty of time to explore your sexuality more seriously, you've got many years ahead of you. It doesn't have to be decided in your teens.


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