Does she like me?

[Iver]

OK. Rather long, and hopefully not too confusing story.

So - I am bisexual, with a near equal preference for guys and girls.

I have developed a huge crush on one of the girls in my classes at uni. She's not conventionally attractive, but has the biggest blue eyes. In fact, I think what started it, was when I stuck up a conversation for the first time, she had rather intense eye contact. It was like, bam.

So, from there, we chatted a fair bit in class, and I noticed this - connection, as I hesitate to call it chemistry. The week before last she suggested to our little group that we meet up for drinks after class. The day came, and I, being very excited to have made new friends up at uni, dressed myself for the occasion.

But, nobody else could come. They'd all made plans, or driven, such and such. So she said, lets go to the pub anyway - and it was just her and I. We ended up staying for 5 hours.

I have never met someone I have connected to on such an intellectual level. We are similar people with a lot of shared and similar tastes in things. So, we order a pint, talk and talk and talk, and she's like, lets get two more. Later, I asked whether she was right to stay for dinner, and she was quite happy to. She suggested another drink. Each time I asked what she felt like, leaving it wide open for hometime-seeyoulater suggestion, but nope, another round of drinks.

The conversation flowed extremely nicely. We talked about life, the universe, everything and then some. Again, her eyes rarely left my face - a characteristic of hers which is most striking. Although she has a habit of fiddling with her hands and jewellery, which I dont know to interpret as nervousness. Body language otherwise was faced towards me, sitting as close to the table as she could get, arms uncrossed - and would occasionally touch or grasp my hands warmly to demonstrate a point.

As you can probably tell, I've pretty much over thought this (this has a large part to do with the fact that it took me 3 days to remember our conversation from friday, and things keep coming back to me, so consistently reminded). She was going to take the bus home, so I insisted my brother, who was driving, take her home. When we got there, she hugged me goodbye (unexpected), and said see you next week.

(Oh, and as far as I know, she's straight. Conversation varied over past boyfriends. The only thing that occured to me, given her body language and personal space, is perhaps she is bi).

As much as it can be an inconvenience to get a crush on a girl, noone has made this much of an impression on me for quite some time, so am rather excited. We swapped phone numbers while there, so I would very much like to text her to ask if she wants to do something again fri night or go see a movie etc etc etc. But first, to stop myself getting too into it, I thought Id ask all for your opinion.

Do you think, from what you know, whether she likes me that way at all, and secondly, how many days should I leave it before texting, or should I just wait till class again?

[Strife]

It sounds to me like she might, if she's not straight. But if she is straight, she may just be...touchy-feely or unconsciously flirtatious maybe? Try to find out if she is bi or straight and I think it's okay to text her just whenever. (except maybe not like right after she leaves the bar/pub. 0.o)

[wonderbread]

The possibility could certainly be there for sure. I would suggest getting to know her a little bit more and then bring up in casual conversation when you two are just talking about things, ask her about her sexuality.

Then you will know and you won't have to sit and continue to wonder if she does or does not like you.

If she is straight, she may just be very friendly and open and doesn't have a problem with touching and such. She just may be a very vibrant bold person when it comes to socializing.
If she is bi, it could be her way of showing she likes you. If it turns out she is bi. Perhaps then you two can just see where things lead to.

Good luck.

[ChaosControl]

I can't say whether or not she likes you in that way, but it certainly sounds like you two developed an amazing friendship very quickly, which is great. If you said you talked to her about everything, maybe see if you can drop a hint and ask subtly about her sexuality. It won't necessarily be outright - just see if you can get talking about it. Good luck.

[Iver]

Hey guys, thanks so much for your replies!

I had forgotten to mention how she made a point of gay marriage when we had discussed the theories of marriage and cultures in class. She was rather (positively) opinionated on the topic. Which obviously also made me wonder. And her favourite song is 'Shes so high' by Tal Bachman.

As much as I am dying to text her right this minute, I'm think perhaps I should wait till thursday and say something along the lines of 'hey, how are you? I was just wondering what you were up to fri night?' etc. Or be more specific - ask if she wanted to have drinks on fri night. Or go to the movies. Cant decide which.

I also wonder whether I should ask our mutual friends - e.g. will she be more relaxed with them or just me?

Thanks again!

[wonderbread]

The discussion about gay marriages may not be an indicator. I have friends that are straight and strongly agree with it. As far as the song, I have never heard of it.

She gave you her number and if she didn't want to text you or have you text her, she would never have given it to you. I would say text her sometime today because if you want to hang out with her, you need to do it sooner. She may make plans before you see her.

I have an idea. Whether it be through text or when you two next see each or hang out. Bring up the topic of gay marriages again and ask her why she feels so strongly about it, she may end up telling you her sexuality and if she doesn't it leaves the door open for you to ask her what her sexuality is.