when do you know

[luvflamingos]

When do you know if you are gay or just experimenting? Will you know? I was recently with a girlfriend of mine and I can not get her out of my head to save my life. I have written a lot about her in poems in the Self Expressions forum. She moved away so we will probably never be together again, but I would if only she could come back. Is it because I miss my friend so much or am I gay? I have never been with a boy, but most of my friends haven't either. I am just confused.

[danni182x]

I think trying new things is just a little rush of excitment and you dont think much of it afterwords. It was just an experiance sort of thing... If you think seriously and could see yourself with a woman, then it's probably something more x

[Soliloquy]

Hi Mary,

That's a really good question! Sometimes it can be hard to determine whether or not what you are feeling actually means you are gay. However, you are still very young. It is not impossible to know what your sexuality is at your age, but I would give yourself some time to see what happens just in case. It could be that you are missing your friend; it would not be unusual that you can't get her out of your head if this is the case. Or, it could be more than that.

Wait a while and see if you continue to feel these things for other girls. If you do, it could be that you are gay. You may also find that you develop feelings for boys over the years and that you really only like girls as friends. Or, you might discover you are bi or pansexual. I think that if the feelings continue to be persistent after a couple or a few years, that is how you will know it has gone beyond bicuriosity.

Sexuality can be a complex thing, however. Some people find that they are never able to put a real label on theirs. I would advise you to try not to fret about it too much. Have fun, be a teenager, notice who you seem to be attracted to, and in a few years, revisit this. The answer might be clearer by then.

Take care!

[luvflamingos]

Thank you.