I don't even know...

[Lilac]

So with every relationship that my friend as been in, I have been super jealous of the relationship and never really approved of the people she dated and never really felt comfortable around them, even when I would force myself to be and would tell myself that I was fine with it all and that I would want to hangout with them and everything and that I was ok with it all.

But it's only been with her relationships that I've ever felt this way. Even when she seems to do more things with other friends or seems to be super attached to someone else I get really jealous and feel left out and then try to subtley insert myself into situations or try to find ways to get me included into it.

Recently I've been thinking and I'm kinda scared but...I feel like I might have feelings for her...She's pratically my sister though, that's how close we are, and I feel wrong for it and scared of the fact that I might have some serious feelings for her...

But I am straight and always have been...Except for beginning of high school when I had this small thing with this one girl but it didn't last very long and it was never ever made public and only 2 of my friends know about it.

I'm just confused because I don't know if it is feelings or if it is just be being jealous, but these feelings only happen with her and her relationships, not with anyone else in our group. Except for sometimes when another of my friends seem to have this deeper connection with another one of my friends than they have with me, then I feel a little jealous and left out but not to the level with my main friend....
I'm also scared because then...What if I do have feelings for her? I would be so scared to come out about it or even talk to anyone about it. And talking to her about it would be the scariest thing ever and I feel like if I did it would ruin our relationship forever....

I don't know what to do Help?
Am I bi, bi-curious, or just too jealous for my own good?

This took a lot of courage for me to write...I'm so scared....

[crissy97]

thee samee thing happend to mee but i am bi u might be bi or bi ciruous

[Astrael]

If she's your best friend its very normal to either be jealous of her (because other people are getting her attention) or that you would develop feelings for them (best friends often have the same qualities as people who you would want to date).
I would say that you are bi-curious because most people are when they are younger.

[Lilac]

What should I do about it though? I'm scared and really nervous about this :/
I have thought about what it might be like to kiss her but I just can't see it happening and I don't think I would really feel anything...

The little relationship I had before, we did kiss and cuddle and I think I felt something then but I think I might have gotten it confused with the deep connection/feeling you feel with someone you are best friends with but at the same time...I think I really did have feelings with her.

I just don't know what to do about this situation at all...

Plus right now there is this guy that I really really like.... I just don't know what to do