Coming Out

[Dez]

So, my birthday is in like 210 days. I want to come out as bisexual on my birthday because I will be 16 years old and my parents are allowing me to date when I'm 16. You may be thinking that that's a long way away, but I want to have everything that I'm going to say straight before then. I was thinking about coming out over Facebook and being like "Hey, I'm bisexual. Questions? Comments? Send me a message/text/email or talk to me in person." Does that work? I'm only thinking about coming out over FB because I'd be able to tell a lot of people at once and only have to worry about telling it to the people who don't have Facebooks. And how should I deal with questions, especially those from friends and family members? I've never dated but I just KNOW I'm bisexual, I can see myself with either gender and have been attracted both sexually and emotionally to both, so what do I say if they say that I've never dated so I can't know? I can't just tell my parents "Oh I've been sexually attracted to people." I'm so nervous but this is something I need to do, only like three people I know in real life know I'm bisexual.

[Enchanted ❧]

Hey there Dez,

I know coming out to your friends and family can be pretty scary. However, it can also be a great thing depending on how they act. I think one of the key things to remember is that if this makes you happy then okay. When I came out to my friends, all my friends were super supportive, even my best friend who is very religious. I am still not out to my parents. I would think about a few things before you come out to them. You are still in school, and living under your parents roof, is telling them going to affect this. I know that it is something you want to do, however if it is going to create damageable negative consequences then maybe wait. If not then go for it, I wish I had that kind of courage. The other thing, how do I tell them I am bisexual if I have never dated? You don't have to date anyone to know that you are a specific sexuality, it is like human nature to just know for some people, if you do tell your parents maybe that would be the best way to explain it to them.

I wish you the best of luck with this Dez,

Trish

[Dez]

Thanks, Trish. I think I'll be okay with telling them. They support gay marriage and all that stuff. I don't know how different it will be having their own daughter be bisexual, but I think that it'd be hypocritical of them to preach all of this stuff about gay marriage and then turn around and shun me.

[lost_soul]

Hey,

If you feel comfortable with coming out and you feel ready enough, then go for it You're blessed to have parents that support gay marriage, that makes it a lot easier. As for the idea of coming out on facebook- maybe you should tell your parents in person first, I think they would probably appreciate finding out through a direct conversation first. But after that, sure, post it on facebook if you feel that would be effective. But remember, posting something like that on facebook can provoke a lot of hate because everybody can see it and anyone can message you something nasty. So be prepared for harsh judgement. As much as I'd like to say that you won't receive hate, it's just not guaranteed.

If people bring up the fact that you haven't dated either sex, so how can you know- you'd have to go about explaining to them that you feel attracted to both guys and girls. You can see yourself in a relationship with either. With their logic, you could say that about straight people who haven't dated too. Make it clear that if you were straight, you wouldn't be feeling both sexual and emotional attraction to other girls.

I hope that made sense and helped a little
Good luck!

[--.redpanda.--]

Hey there,

Listen. I've come out twice before in my life. I actually continuously hide it from my coworkers and most of my friends. Sure, I know that is a bad thing because they don't know the true me. Coming out is putting your faith into someone. It is scary, but you have to have faith that everything will come out right. I mean, I can't really be the one to talk, but I believe what I believe.

Having faith in the people you tell and faith in yourself is the most important thing in the world. If you hide it, it only hurts you in the end.

I wish you the best,

--.redpanda.--

[MichWolverineFreak]

That would scare the crap outta me... because anyone you just meet can look you up and prejudice you.