Accepting Yourself

[msfsteven]

If the username didn't give me away, I'm [Steven]. Anyway, my concern is that I'm never able to sit down and accept myself for who I am... Sometimes I just want to ignore the fact that I'm [bisexual], but I don't think I'd ever be able to do that. It just seems that [almost everyone] thinks of homosexual affiliation as something to be frowned upon. Some people even act like they are disgusted with it. It just makes me feel like something is wrong with me. I'm actually just really confused about myself. I just wish that I could accept myself for who I am, but I feel like I have to rationalize my sexuality, but is there really anything wrong with it? I don't know. Any personal experiences/advice? Thanks for reading!

[ronymajani]

Well I don't know anyone that's BIO so I don't really know what you're going through but I can tell you this: being bisexual maybe weird for a lot of because it isn't something you see everyday but there's nothing you can do about it and you never chose you was born with it so it's like your saying you were born a girl not a boy (like you're a different gender) so learn to live with it, because somehow you have convinced yourself that it's wrong to be bio so you can't accept yourself with who you are. As for you being confused with yourself that has nothing to do with you being bio it's just now you have reached an age in which you want to explore yourself and find out your purpose in life AKA your ambition and something that makes you feel complete. And it would be nice to have a friend you could talk to and in your situation I would say a girl that isn't trying so hard to be popular at high school and one day you'll find someone you love but it won't be easy. So in conclusion i can tell you that there is nothing at all wrong with being gay it's just how you were born not a lifestyle choice and you will get by this just learn to accept you for who and what you are and adapt to any change and be optimistic. Hope this helps.
Sincerely RNY.M the new teenhelp.org unemployed mentor

[bbratton]

Most people will always frown upon things they do not understand, that doesn't make them right. We are all created to be and certain way, so you will accept it eventually and there is absolutely nothing wrong with being bi. Surround yourself with accepting, understanding people and opinions, if that isnt an option now. Just know that life goes on and it will get easier once you accept who you are.

[Celestial.]

Hey Steven.

I can definitely relate to how you're feeling. Unfortunately, we live in a world where, quite often, people will look down upon things they don't understand. That's why we have discrimination, distrust, and misunderstandings. But the thing is, just because you're part of a minority, it doesn't mean you're wrong, or that there's anything wrong with you - because there isn't. Being bisexual is just as natural as being straight. As for ignoring your feelings - you could try, but chances are it would just make things worse. Don't try to repress your feelings or pretend to be someone you're not.

It can be hard to be around people who don't understand, but there are plenty of people, both in the LGBT community and outside of it, who are supportive and do understand. Being gay, bisexual, pansexual, or anything else is nothing to be ashamed for, and nothing you should apologise for. If people try to tell you otherwise, don't listen to them. It can help to talk to people who are like you, or who understand. Do you have any LGBT friends? If you're not out in real life, you can always talk to people online - like right here on TeenHelp. The social groups could be a good way to start: LGBT/Queer or the GSA, for example. Being around people who are like you can be a really good confidence-booster.

I wish you all the best with everything. Take care.

[MacGuffin]

Well, for one, you live in Texas. Texas isn't exacting the most accepting state in matters such as this. Don't judge everywhere else in the country just because many Texans hold conservative and evangelical beliefs in regards to sexuality.

There is nothing "wrong" with you for being bisexual. It can seem that way when everyone around you doesn't accept that, but it isn't the truth. There are always people in the world who will accept you for who you are and what you identify with. It's just a matter of finding them. And honestly, when you have no other options, the internet is a great way to do that.

Here's what i have learned about sexuality in the last five or six years or so: it really does not matter what other people think of your sexuality. What matters is what you think. Life is too short to be bothered by trying to fit in with people who, if they knew the "true" you, would think differently of you. So find those who do support and understand you and you will be better off.

You aren't weird or wrong. You're just different from most people, and that is okay.

[justmeg]

i know what you mean by feeling like you have to rationalize how you feel. i sometimes think the same thing, and although i'm still kind of questioning my sexuality i sometimes wonder if i'd be able to be comfortable with who i am. it kind of sucks being confused, so i totally know how you feel. i don't have too much advice besides "stay strong!" but i hope that helps feel free to PM me if you ever want to talk.

[ProjectD]

It's strange isn't it? You feel different, but that's only because people make it different.

I accept myself, and sometimes doubt myself. I feel as though I have to "prove it" even though I feel that I already have. It's a weird existence, but I'm happy to be me.

[justmeg]

Originally Posted by ProjectD

It's strange isn't it? You feel different, but that's only because people make it different.

i like this...it's true, though, isn't it? i dislike that people make those who are not part of the mainstream feel so different/uncomfortable, however unintentionally they do so...

[bookishnerd]

I'm in the same boat right now. I know I'm bisexual (I've unknowingly known since I was 5), but it's so hard for me to accept because my family doesn't like anyone who isn't hetero and it clashes with my "religion." I mean I believe in the basics but not all of the details. It's tough to know what to do. I know who I am, yet it feels so wrong because of the way I was raised. Life is full of challenges and not all of them have easy answers. Don't change who you are because of others. You are you and they are them. Instead of "doing as the Romans do," keep your head raised and walk your own path.
Best of luck!