Male Advice Preferred: crushin on a straight guy......

[CutewitouttheE14]

okay so theres this kid who is in two of my classes in school, hes really attractive and really nice. we dont talk much but when we do it seems like hes really interested in the convorsation. but then when his friends are around idk if its me not wanting to talk bcz his friends are there but who knows, but we used to sit next to each other in math(algebra to be exact) then our seats got moved, were friend on facebook and we have each others numbers we just dont really talk except for in person, but other than that he claims to be straight, which im unsure of and i think there is some curiosity there but im not sure if i wanna be the one to find out. i have had really good dreams about "what if's" and what not but im too afraid to find out if it can ever come tru. anyone got any advice. greatly appreciated.

[Chris.]

Ah, believe it or not this happens alot to Teenagers (girls and boys). I personally have experimented, and learned that I am straight. The only way to really find out if you are attracted to boys is to experiment and to flirt alittle - I know this will be hard and if you do it to the wrong people it may turn out bad. Personally, me and my friends joke around (sexually) all the time and I think that is a good way to figure eachother out and ourselves. Maybe start texting him, and see how he reacts; maybe get into his group of friends and hangout with him? The more interaction with him the better off you will find yourself and what you are attracted to.

Best wishes,
Chris

[notwhoithinkiam]

if you think he is straight and you are open about your sexuality, i would say let him make the first move, and I know it's hard as hell to do, but just keep friends, basically resume as normal. it's unlikely to happen but if you were to approach him, you may kinda scare him off a bit. If the topic of sexuality comes up, ask if he's ever experimented, or wanted to. (i am assuming you are open about your sexuality and I am assuming you are not straight)

[aj1995]

I completly get you on this one, there is this guy in my history class and he knows i like him and he is ok with that. i flirt with him and he flirts with me but sadly we can never be. He is Bi and he is intrested in this girl and i just wish i could tell him why i would be the better pick

[Lune]

Originally Posted by CutewitouttheE14

okay so theres this kid who is in two of my classes in school, hes really attractive and really nice. we dont talk much but when we do it seems like hes really interested in the convorsation. but then when his friends are around idk if its me not wanting to talk bcz his friends are there but who knows, but we used to sit next to each other in math(algebra to be exact) then our seats got moved, were friend on facebook and we have each others numbers we just dont really talk except for in person, but other than that he claims to be straight, which im unsure of and i think there is some curiosity there but im not sure if i wanna be the one to find out. i have had really good dreams about "what if's" and what not but im too afraid to find out if it can ever come tru. anyone got any advice. greatly appreciated.

I know the feeling. A person i like i think would like me back. I doubt he's gay, but I'm betting he's Bi. It would be hard for you i think, but try to see how he is, you never know he might be hiding it like i do.

[MacGuffin]

I don't see how talking in class and having someone's phone number necessarily means they aren't straight. I mean, I have plenty of girls' numbers in my phone, ones I think are very attractive, too, but I don't assume it means they are bisexual/lesbian and think I am cute but don't want to tell me so. I am sure you have your reasons for thinking this, though. After all, you know him and I don't.

However, I want to caution you against placing tons of hope into your observations. Some of them could be because you want to see them there, and so you do. Others could be legitimate. Either way, you can't really know.

My main point is that if someone claims they are straight they are doing so for a reason. I assume you had this conversation about his orientation away from other people, which gives his claim all the more credibility. If he said he is straight it means that, even if he isn't, he's not open to being with a guy right know. And you need to be able to respect that. You can have your hunches and keep them in mind, but now is not the time to do anything about it. So for all intents and purposes, he is straight.

Can you continue being his friend? Absolutely. But I would not advise pressing for more anytime soon, especially if he continues to claim he is straight OR do things that reflect that.

Having crushes on heterosexual members of your gender really sucks. But it's best not to put too much stock in them. It only causes you heartbreak, most often, if you do.

I do advise continuing to be his friend, though. Don't wait for him to initiate conversation all the time, but initiate it sometimes on your own. Maybe invite him to hang out sometime. I know that can be nerve wracking, but you'll get to know him better. And who knows, maybe if he isn't completely straight he'll reveal that in some way.