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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Lovehatelife23 Offline
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Name: Leslie
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July 22nd 2012, 03:03 PM

So, i finally have a Boyfriend after all these years. His mom is a total Bitch & doesnt like me.
Me & him has been together for 3 weeks now & is in Love & his mom doesnt see that.
She doesnt like me what so ever. His mom & my mom got into it on the phone bout why i came over yesterday to see him & then told my mom the REASONS why she doesnt like me.

1.) Im Overweight
2.) I have short Hair
3.) I dont drive & he doesnt either
4.) I live off the Governments Money & food Stamps Which i have no problem because its helping me.
5.) I dont have Social Skills

My Mom Blew off like a "FIREBALL" when his mom said bout Im Overweight. My boyfriend really loves me & his mom will NEVER NEVER LIKE ME!

She thinks im from a Hood, & all this crazy stuff. All you have to do is get to know me & you will love me. Ive never seen someone Never turn away from me because I always seem to Attach myself w/o me doing anything. which is weird.

See my boyfriend had ex's but they used him for his MONEY & IM NOT LIKE THAT!!! I wanted to show his mom & she wont take the time.

Shes selling his House, He's moving in w/ me because he really Loves me & wants to be w/ me. She dont see that in his EYES because she wants him to her.

Im not allowed to Spend the nite at his house & if his mom gets the HINT of it then the House is gone. Shes a Total BITCH!!! He's 25 Years old & Im 21 Years Old & we know whats RIGHT & WRONG but she THINKS OTHERWISE!!!

What do i do????


He also has 2 Jobs which he works at

Walmart & Sheriff's Office!!!

Walmart is where he Asked me out & My parents heard every word & I felt Happy!!!!

But WE LOVE EACH OTHER!!!


R.I.P
CJ Collins 1993-2008
He was a Awesome Kid
I Love you n Miss you


You learn at a certain pace. Then that pace goes away. Then

you try and try to do everything you can. Then it gets harder.

Then you give up. Then its all over.

Leslie

Last edited by PSY; July 23rd 2012 at 03:19 AM. Reason: Merged consecutive posts.
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
HisPrincess Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 22nd 2012, 04:17 PM

Well honestly, the first thing that comes to mind is if you're 21 and he's 25, what business does his mom have to really even say anything about you two? I mean, I could be wrong but it's not like you two are a couple teens that have been forbidden to see each other. You are two adults that are dating with one of the parents not having consent to it. Honestly, I think you'll just need to give her time. Maybe over time she'll see you aren't as bad as she thinks you are. You can't really do anything about it at this point. I don't think you need to really change anything you're doing. Just continue to be as respectful as possible when she's around(I know that's hard) and maybe one day she'll come around. It sounds like to me that if all of his other past girlfriends took his money, she's protective of him and doesn't want that to happen to him again. Hang in there and keep your head up. Maybe she'll come around. And if not, you'll have to play it by ear and see how things go. Good luck and let me know if you ever want to talk!

~Angelica


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Complicated - July 22nd 2012, 08:01 PM

Honestly my fiance's parents thought I was a pregnant lesbian gold digging slut looking to steal his seed and all of his money. (I'm not joking those were pretty much their exact words) They even told him if he didn't break up with me that he would be kicked out until he stood his ground, told them he loved me and wasn't breaking up with me no matter what they did. Today his mother is asking me about what my wedding dress looks like and invites me to family gatherings and funerals. In my opinion she's being protective of him which is perfectly understandable, it's not alright for her to say those things about you just like its not alright that my fiances parents said those things about me but honestly if you want to move on then you have to just accept it, allow him to stand his ground without you getting involved and give her time. I'm pretty sure your parents will never get along but again another thing you'll have to accept that its just them trying to protect their babies and hope that with time things will get easier.
I hope I helped, and I hope that with time his mother can see what a great person you are and move past his exes.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Complicated - July 22nd 2012, 09:02 PM

I think his mother is being totally unreasonable here, she's only known you for 3 weeks!

Give it time, that's all you can really do, she may come around and see you for the person that truly are. If there's no change, then you may just have to bear with it and be the bigger person (i.e. be nice to her, even if she isnt always nice to you)

I hope things get sorted out.
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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Lovehatelife23 Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 25th 2012, 01:53 PM

Thanks yall, It has been getting harder for me to bare w/ everything that his mom does.

I have this SARCASM for Walmart (AKA) - that i live there, bc i always shop there & its my favorite place.

She took that in the wrong, I cant go to WALMART anymore While hes working bc SHE thinks im making him lose his JOB, He cant CALL me bc His mom & Step Dad Turn off his phone, & She thought he was breaking up w/ me yesterday bc she was giving his house back, but is still going to go out w/ me.

I have this GUT Feeling that something & somewhere that something is going to eventually happen to get him to turn away from me for GOOD, so she can get wat she WANTS....

I really wanted to Die yesterday knowing that i thought i was going to lose him for good....NOBODY doesnt understand that YES, i had other BF's but this is the FIRST REAL ONE,

That - Asked me out,
Actually Cared,
Actually made love,
Actually Listens,
Actually Loves me for who i am & doesnt have to Change anything...

& if everything goes away along w/ him, Im going to DIE bc it wont be the SAME, Im going to feel USED, Im going to feel like my REAL BIRTH MOTHER, I just dont want that to happen...But its just the GUT FEELING that wont go away!!!! I dont know what to do???? PLZ HELP!!!


R.I.P
CJ Collins 1993-2008
He was a Awesome Kid
I Love you n Miss you


You learn at a certain pace. Then that pace goes away. Then

you try and try to do everything you can. Then it gets harder.

Then you give up. Then its all over.

Leslie
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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
HisPrincess Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 25th 2012, 03:37 PM

Honestly I think it's just going to take some time to get that gut feeling to go away. You've spent your entire relationship with this guy having so many people against the relationship, that it really does make sense for you to have this fear that you're going to loose him. So at this point, the fear really does make sense. You haven't been with this guy very long yet so the mix of what is most likely trust issues and then the issues with his parents have not helped your fears and concerns. I would maybe sit down with your boyfriend and talk these feelings out as it may make you feel a little better. I hope things get better, it's always really hard when the relationship isn't wanted by the parents. But here is something to think about.

You both are adults. Quite honestly, I don't see why he can't call you or why you can't go to Walmart anymore just in case you could be messing with his job? I really think she needs to realize that you both are ADULTS. She is treating you like children.Quite frankly, yes, he can call you. And you can go to Walmart whenever you want. Try to keep in mind here that she doesn't have complete control of your life. You got this. Hope this helps, we're here for you.

~Angelica


Formerly jelli1224

Trusting is not a mistake, but it is important to realize that things change. ~ Kmn483<3Bliz

Please feel free to PM me. I love to help others, and can be an ear to talk to, a shoulder to cry on, or a face to scream at. <3

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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
Lovehatelife23 Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 25th 2012, 07:42 PM

Yes, I see the point.

We are Adults, She does need to Back off but then again i dont want to put my (2 since) in it to make things worse.
My head for the past week has been Hurting w/ his mom & worrying & everything else....

His mom just basically wants him to DUMP ME & Go back to his Original Life w/ him being Miserable....

I Hurt in the inside but dont show it on the outside...

I just dont know anymore...


R.I.P
CJ Collins 1993-2008
He was a Awesome Kid
I Love you n Miss you


You learn at a certain pace. Then that pace goes away. Then

you try and try to do everything you can. Then it gets harder.

Then you give up. Then its all over.

Leslie
  Send a message via Skype™ to Lovehatelife23 
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
HisPrincess Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 25th 2012, 10:01 PM

Hang in there. All I can really say at this point is to be as polite as possible when you are forced to be around her and we're here for you if you need to vent. I can understand not wanting to make things worse by bringing things up. But at the same time, if you never bring anything up, she's never going to back off. Just some things to think about. You're in such a tough situation, I wish I could help you more than I am. Just know that if you ever want to message me and talk about this or anything else, you can. Okay?

~Angelica


Formerly jelli1224

Trusting is not a mistake, but it is important to realize that things change. ~ Kmn483<3Bliz

Please feel free to PM me. I love to help others, and can be an ear to talk to, a shoulder to cry on, or a face to scream at. <3

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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Lovehatelife23 Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 26th 2012, 03:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by HisPrincess View Post
Hang in there. All I can really say at this point is to be as polite as possible when you are forced to be around her and we're here for you if you need to vent. I can understand not wanting to make things worse by bringing things up. But at the same time, if you never bring anything up, she's never going to back off. Just some things to think about. You're in such a tough situation, I wish I could help you more than I am. Just know that if you ever want to message me and talk about this or anything else, you can. Okay?

~Angelica

Thanx, Im trying my best, I will let you kno if i need anything, thanx again


R.I.P
CJ Collins 1993-2008
He was a Awesome Kid
I Love you n Miss you


You learn at a certain pace. Then that pace goes away. Then

you try and try to do everything you can. Then it gets harder.

Then you give up. Then its all over.

Leslie
  Send a message via Skype™ to Lovehatelife23 
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
HisPrincess Offline
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Re: Complicated - July 29th 2012, 05:18 AM

Of course! I'm always just a VM or PM away if you need me! Good luck!

~Angelica


Formerly jelli1224

Trusting is not a mistake, but it is important to realize that things change. ~ Kmn483<3Bliz

Please feel free to PM me. I love to help others, and can be an ear to talk to, a shoulder to cry on, or a face to scream at. <3

Help LINK Mentor - March 19th 2011 to April 16th 2011

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Associate Live Help Operator - August 13th 2012 <3
   
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