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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Being Approached - September 22nd 2013, 05:56 AM

This is a question that I would like the girls on here to answer (guys can also answer this with a preference as to which way works better): would you like to be approached by a guy when you're by yourself, or when you are with a friend or a group of friends, especially if it's for the first time that you meet him? Also, same thing goes for after meeting the guy for the first time and you're interested in him. Voice your opinions out, and thank you very much!




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Re: Being Approached - September 22nd 2013, 09:55 AM

Obviously alone in most cases.
Only if your approach is going quite bad, she will be more comfortable around her friends who can drag her outta there.
If it goes well however she will be more hesitant to give you her number or whatever if she's with friends. She will want her friends approval too, so you need both her and all her friends to like you, all that within a few minutes. It's advanced stuff.


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Re: Being Approached - September 22nd 2013, 11:58 AM

While I am alone, both for the first time and after. If I like him then definitely alone. I don't like my friends hearing everything we talk about and asking questions and that annoying stuff
   
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Re: Being Approached - September 22nd 2013, 04:02 PM

That depends on the situation.

Like in a bar I will never under any circumstances leave with a guy whether I am with my friends or not, so it doesn't matter if you approach me alone or with my friends. If you're being creepy or coming on way to strong I'll probably get super uncomfortable and just want to get away from you, so having a friend around can help there, but kind of depends, you know, I can get away on my own too. But if the conversation is going good, hey, I'll take your number and talk to you later, plan a date etc.

Usually in a place that a guy might approach me it's cause I am busy--I'm getting groceries, stopping to get coffee on the way home from the gym etc.--and there is some reason I might have to move on, but I'm not going to blow a guy off either unless I feel uncomfortable, it's just I think it is also important to realize that a girl doesn't have all day if she's in a situation where her time might be limited, if you think she's pretty you need to make an impression and make it fast without putting her in an uncomfortable situation. Here it also doesn't matter if someone is there or not....

... But if the conversation is going great and neither of us have anywhere to be then being alone would be better if we want to carry on the conversation by getting coffee or something then it's better I am alone because I am not just going to abandon someone I was already spending time with.....

... one disadvantage to having a girls friends around is that I think, personally, I'd be more likely to be self conscious and uncomfortable if a guy is trying a little to hard to hit on me. It's not that I am an insecure person or anything, it's just that you tend to be more aware if you know your friends are hearing what's going on and can very easily give you an opinion right away, and it's kind of awkward if you feel like a guy is practically trying to get your pants off in front of your friends, obviously that's a wild exaggeration but that's just cause I think it is important to differentiate between that and just like casual light flirting... But like, let's say I am at a party, a social, a bar, a group thingy etc. with a bunch of other people and I start clicking with a guy, that's totally fine...

... But it can also seem rude if you're like "oh, that girls cute" and are sitting there trying to hit on her and leaving her in the position where she has to ignore her friend to talk to you, like if a girl is already having lunch or coffee or what ever with someone, you might almost be better off just letting that one go unless you can find a way to talk to both of them and not ignore the friend, but even still, if 2 girls are talking over lunch they probably don't want some random guy just plopping down and being like "hey, hi, you're fiiiiine and I just had to know you now" cause they'd be more likely to be like "excuse me? we were talking, you seriously had to interrupt us just cause you have to try to get with every pretty girl you see, fuck off"

Do you see where I am going with this? It's super situationally dependent and your approach matters so much more than whether or not there are other people with her...




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Re: Being Approached - September 22nd 2013, 04:13 PM

I think both times (alone and with friends) are great. Alone is nice, because then him and I could talk about whatever we want , without my friends saying anything awkward.
BUUUUUUUUT on the other hand, coming up to me when my friends can show me that you're comfortable being around me, even around my friends (who LOVE to make things awkward when I'm around guys). And if things get awkward/the guy turns out to be a creep, my friends are there to help. I always have issues with feeling like guys are ashamed of liking me, so having a guy talk to me and show interest in me when others are around means a lot.
Even more so, coming up to say hi when I'm alone and he's with his friends is really nice and sweet only if I know him though. If you see a girl who you don't know, and go up to talk to her with all your friends, she could feel a bit creeped out and swarmed.


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Re: Being Approached - September 23rd 2013, 12:27 AM

I don't really mind it either way. However sometimes, when I'm having really girly conversations with my friends and if a guy walks up then, it's just awkward. But yeah, I'd say approaching a girl when she's along is the best way to go.


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