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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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do you get mad when your boyfriend stop listening to you? - July 15th 2015, 03:48 AM

does it furstrate you when your boyfriend pisses you off to your last limit then dissappear for a while because he chose to refuse to listen to you? he cut his phone off because its prepaid when he dont wanna be bothered and only be left with texting and internet. i didn't know this until today. he pissed me off purposely to my last limit during our argument. he was saying things disrespectful but he didn't call me out my name. he got a smart mouth and he's the kind of guy that always wanna win at an argument or something just to get the last word. i grew furious since he was ignoring me because he always think that i am some kind of mind reader. last night since he didn't listen and understand how angry i was acting. i got into that image of portraying an upset girl. i hacked into his facebook account when he was sleep and closed it up. i even locked up his emails. it might been wrong what i done but this is how i am feeling and was feeling at the time because he was continuing to do more stuff to piss me off for a reaction. i was literally going crazy and still is because of what occured. i did all of this because he wouldn't listen and i had got tired of it. he didn't get mad about me hacking his stuff, still he can't logon.. i dont regret how i reacted to this i felt so much better afterwards i had to let some of it out.
                   
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Re: do you get mad when your boyfriend stop listening to you? - July 20th 2015, 07:14 AM

Hey there. First off communication is key in any relationship, but sometimes others may find it hard to communicated in a way that is needed to keep the relationship going smoothly. My husband will go for a walk, or leave the room when we start to argue. This is our way of letting things cool down before they get explosive. Maybe that's simply what your boyfriend was trying to do.

My husband and I have been together for quite some time, and just recently did he start expressing his feelings and concerns with me, rather than just walking way and pretending things didn't happen. I feel that you locking up your boyfriends facebook and emails was not only inappropriate, but childish. It may have made you feel better at that moment, but your actions could have caused the issue to become more 'explosive' rather than just giving him space.

I know sometimes it can be hard to remain calm when we get angry, but we also need to keep in mind that not every person is the same, so while you may like to talk things out, he may not. You just have to give him space, and allow him to make his own decisions regarding the situation. You can try to talk to him at a later time about it if the problem isn't' resolved.

I hope this helps, and I wish you the best of luck. If you need anything else, feel free to PM me at anytime. Take care~


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Re: do you get mad when your boyfriend stop listening to you? - July 21st 2015, 11:49 PM

Ignoring you isn't a healthy part of a relationship and neither is hacking into his accounts. I think you both need to take some time to cool off, then sit him down in person and try and communicate. It seems to me that you guys are having trouble communicating, and that's a key element in staying together and being able to work through any issues.
Ade is right that some people like to talk things out right away, while others like to have some space first to cool off, and then talk about it. It sounds like he's the type who wants space, so you need to try and respect that even if he did something that really upset you. Trying to talk things out when either of you are upset can very likely make the situation worse. Instead, try going for a run, taking a hot shower, or doing something creative to get your emotions out. Once you feel more level-headed, that's when you should try and find a compromise together and a resolution.
I understand you don't feel bad about locking him out of his accounts, but that really isn't a good way to handle your emotions. It will make you feel better temporarily, but at what cost? It may just push you both further away and cause more problems within your relationship. That's why it's best to try and not act out without thinking, and to find activities to cool down. Fights are normal in relationships, but they should never cause either of you to do mean things to each other.


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Re: do you get mad when your boyfriend stop listening to you? - July 22nd 2015, 01:20 AM

You can't get mad at someone for doing that. You gotta let them slide because what if they're distracted? Or busy with something at the same time they're talking to you?

Unless it's in person. That's a different story.
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