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Girl I like doesn't even speak to me anymore! - October 12th 2015, 02:09 PM

Hello. I have a crush on this girl, but it is no normal crush. I honestly love this girl like family and I would love it if we could at least be friends. But let me tell you how this all started... I asked if I could join her at homecoming because I am new to the school district. She said yes. At homecoming I told her how nice she looks and she just smiled and said thanks, you too. After that we used to talk a lot in science class. She said I was sweet and we might date if she knows me a little longer because I told her that I had feelings for her. She also knows about my foot fetish, but that's another story. She recently noticed that I was feeling sad and not really doing as much socially. I told her I would talk to her on Kik that night because I didn't want people eavesdropping. I told her my history of depression and that recently I have been having strong thoughts of suicide. She kind of gave a little advice over Kik, but not in real life. We sit next to each other in science but we never even say hi anymore. What should I say to her? What should I do? I have already waited a week like my friend said, and I just want to talk to her again...
   
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Re: Girl I like doesn't even speak to me anymore! - October 12th 2015, 04:33 PM

First, stop any "wait" games. Those are games and very poor methods of communication. Human relationships are not games. There is no special formula of waiting, there is no "correct amount of time" between text messages. Say what you need to say, ask the questions directly, and don't let weird social norms create barriers between conversation.

Next, she might not like you the same way that you like her. I'd accept that as a possibility before pursuing anything. After that, I'd reach out to her and thank her for being understanding of your depression history, but point out that she's been quiet lately and ask if everything is okay between you two. Honestly, she may have just had a busy week. Maybe something is going on in her personal life and it's caused her to be quiet lately. It may have nothing to do with you, and by reaching out, you have the potential to be there for you as the friend you want to be.

Back on the relationship thing. If she ends up not liking you, you need to decide what that means for your relationship. Are you fine just staying friends? Many people believe that at the beginning, but become weird after a while because their feelings get in the way. You need to be upfront with yourself on that front. If this is a person you believe is worth keeping in your life regardless of relationship status, only you can fight for that and establish that you're there for the long run.

Good luck!


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& the sun said “it hurts to become."
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