Tricky situation

[MacGuffin]

So I have a situation regarding Boy A and Boy B. Boy A is my ex boyfriend. We broke up not quite for months ago. For a long time, Boy A and I were not friends, and we both moved in separate directions. The fact of the matter is, I never got over Boy A. Recently, we have become friends again, and gotten close very quickly. I know Boy A can never care about me the way I care about him; we have determined this through talks together. But I still care for Boy A very deeply. He means a lot to me.


Boy B is someone I met a little while ago. We have had a friends with benefits relationship for a while, but nothing more. Boy B is really sweet, intelligent, kind, physically attractive, and an all around good person for me to be around. I really like him. Recently I discovered Boy B wants to be more than friends with benefits; he wants to be a couple. Problem is, deep down I still love Boy A. And this is causing stress in the relationship I have and value with Boy B. I don't know what to do, or how to handle things. It seems the more Boy B and I talk about this, the more miscommunications occur. Boy A can't feel the same for me as I do for him, though. Im lost. What do I do?

[Pelios]

If I was you I would try to focus more on Boy B, because you said that Boy A never loved you the same way that you loved him what guarantees you that he will change? Let Boy B have a chance. I would try talking to Boy A less and see if he gets the hint.
Good Luck.

[PSY]

Jordan, I apologize in advance if I come across as harsh. =P

Time and time again, I've been impressed by your ability to see things so clearly, when responding to other members' problems. So I find myself wondering... why are you still thinking about Boy A? Yes, I realize you're in love with him, and yes, I realize that it's not an easy thing to shake off... but you KNOW that it can't work out. Your heart is holding on, irrationally, and it's hurting your chances to be in other healthy, loving relationships. Let your brain take over. If you must, force yourself to take that first step toward moving on... because continuing to brood over Boy A is a waste of time.

If you do decide to pursue something with Boy B (or any other boy), I would suggest that you take things slowly. I think it's great that you're trying to explain where you're coming from, regarding Boy A. There seems to be a lot of miscommunication at the moment, though, which could hurt your chances of being with Boy B. Ask yourself why this miscommunication is occurring. Perhaps it's because you don't have a "plan", regarding Boy A and moving on... so Boy B is uncertain about whether or not it's worth getting into a relationship with you, which then makes you uncertain about whether or not it's a good idea to date Boy B, and so on and so forth.