Twisted Situation (Kind Of Long)

[Shadow90]

I find myself in a very twisted situation at this point in time. I broke up with my girlfriend a couple weeks ago. It had to be done. She was becoming so demanding and so controling I couldn't stand it. I had hopes that I would end up with this girl who I previously liked. She turned me down as she did two years ago. I was feeling very sad.

But now, the situation is more complicated. My ex found me and asked if I was dating this girl who turned me down. I said no. What happened next has had me stunned and confused for a week. She tells me that this girl in fact told her that she was going to try and "go after" me after we broke up. That was less then a month ago. I asked her again about it and she said it wasnt true. I asked her friend about it and she said she didn't think it was true either. I confront my ex about it and asked why she was lying and playing with my emotions. She reaffirms her stance and tells me that this girl also told her about how much she liked the dance I went to with her. And how she wanted me to kiss her on the dance floor, but i didnt't; even though I wanted to but was scared to. I told her to stop lying. But she continues to tell me its true. And more I think about it, the more it seems possible.

Apparently, the comments made about the dance came in the past November, of 2009. My ex was friends with this girl but stopped talking to her in November of 2009. And then she told her to stop talking to me in March of this year. In which this girls alleged response was, "He's gonna leave you. And when he does, I'm going after him."

I'm so confused. Everyone thinks its a lie; except me and her. While she doesnt have the text messages anymore, she claims she has the exact dates of when this girl said these things. I want to believe it, but something tells me its a lie. But I dont know for sure. I've never fully told this girl how I feel and I wanted to kiss her so bad. Even though we have been friends, I miss holding her like I did at this dance. My ex says if I tell her how I feel she may break and give in and tell the truth. It's all just so confusing. Any advice?

[TheLittleNinja]

Its a bit complicated....

This is what I would do....

I'd go and talk to this girl that you like and say 'Look, my ex is saying this ".......blah......", but I want to know if it's true....'

That way, if it's a set up (Between this girl and your ex), then she can't laugh at you - for you expecting her to fall into your arms. But, if it is true, you have now found out and can work on the relationship from there.

Does that make sense? Talking to her will be the best way. Is your ex the sort of person to lie, or the sort of person who would want you to be happy?

[Lasha]

Tell her specific things your ex said and tell her it gave you hope because you've liked her for a long time, but you're confused because your ex might be lying for who knows what reason, and you would like to know for sure if she really likes you or not, so you can at least move on if she doesn't.

This way, you seem open to moving on and not getting creepy if she rejects you, but you also tell her she won't be rejected in case that is what she's afraid of. It seems simple to me.

Hope that helps.

[Jacksonian]

Originally Posted by QuackerJackWoop

Its a bit complicated....

This is what I would do....

I'd go and talk to this girl that you like and say 'Look, my ex is saying this ".......blah......", but I want to know if it's true....'

That way, if it's a set up (Between this girl and your ex), then she can't laugh at you - for you expecting her to fall into your arms. But, if it is true, you have now found out and can work on the relationship from there.

Does that make sense? Talking to her will be the best way. Is your ex the sort of person to lie, or the sort of person who would want you to be happy?

This is a really good advice except just one thing. If you go and ask her this, and it turns out your girlfriend was lying, it will be very very awkward. Since you asked this girl you like out after you broke up with your girlfriend, and she said no, i would say leave her. Because if she did like you she would have said yes. But you never know there may have been a reason she said no, but I highly doubt this. I think you should just leave the matter alone and take a break from this issue.