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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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iamraq Offline
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Unhappy I dont know what to think or do! HELP! - February 28th 2009, 09:08 PM

so i was in the this long distance relationship for 8 months we talked all the time and he would come visit. i visted him for 8 days over winter break and after that he broke up with me..long story...i kept bothering him to get back together and fix things but he kept saying that he didnt want a girlfriend and i just kept bothering him but i completely stopped because i realized that i was just making it worse and i didnt want to push him away anymore. i stop talking to him completely for about a week and then texted him to see how everything was going. he told me that he was glad that i was trying more than anything and i told him that i hope that in the future that we can become good friends/more in the future and he said "i dont know. maybe. we'll see what happens" i texted him again the next night just saying "heyy" and he didnt say anything back and then 2 more days later i texted him again and he didnt say anything again i dont know what to do. i feel really bad about bothering him in the beginning and i've definitely learned from all of it. i had never had a bf before him and didnt know how to deal with breaking up. i've definitely come along way even though it hasnt been that long. i just want our friendship back. i dont know what to think. I still really care about him. I hate not talking to him since we talked every single day for so long and he was my best friend. He was there when my mom died and when i was having a hard time living with my aunt. He was someone that i could talk to no matter what. HELP!! i dont know what to do!

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Re: I dont know what to think or do! HELP! - February 28th 2009, 11:49 PM

Do you ever see him in person? I'd suggest trying to talk to him in person and explain that you've learnt from your mistake and just miss his friendship and want it back.
Other than that, maybe he needs more time? Sounds like he's being moody (I hate it when guys are like that) with you, try waiting it out.
Other than that I'm not sure. I get that you don't want to lose a friend, I know how much it sucks.


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Re: I dont know what to think or do! HELP! - March 1st 2009, 12:32 AM

I dunno, I think it's over for now. Maybe just focus on getting your life together and pursing things that don't have to do with him? I know it's rough, but I think you need to move on. And I think he wants to move on, too... and I think it's the best thing to do.

Not all ex-lovers need to be best friends immediately after the break up, in fact, very few are. It's two totally different relationships and I bet both of you need some time yourselves to pick up the pieces and find a new direction in life.


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Re: I dont know what to think or do! HELP! - March 1st 2009, 01:11 AM

It seems to me like he may want or need some space and time right now. For me, I know it would be the case. Sometimes a little break is needed after the breakup. The break allows time for thinking, setting in, and sometimes time for reconsidering. Reconsidering isn't always guaranteed, but giving him time may allow him to do so.

Anyways, I'd personally recommend waiting with it until he contacts you back. I know it hurts a lot and you want things to go back to how they were before, but it can only happen in time when he's ready for it. When (or if) he's ready to patch things up in some form, I'm sure he'll let you know.

If you ever want to talk about this, please do know you can PM me anytime.

Take care.



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