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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 06:23 PM

Im 16 years old and I met this amazing guy. He's 20 years old and is studying business. He is already making a commitment that when he turns 21 in a couple months he will not drink around me. He wont even text me if he gets drunk. He is not going to pressure me into anything that I don't want and he really respects me. What do you think?


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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 06:27 PM

He sounds like a great guy on paper. But to be honest, these things never end well. I watched one of my friends go through this sophomore year. She was 15, he was 20. He made a lot of the same promises to her. But even though it's illegal, they ended up having sex. He figured out that it could ruin his life and he ended up leaving the state without telling anyone. I'm not saying the same thing will happen to you, but I really would advise against you dating an adult while you're still a minor. In the end though, it's up to you.


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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 06:45 PM

I agree with Samantha. My friend was sixteen when she went out with a twenty year old and the whole thing ended very messily ~ he took complete advantage of her, used her for sex, cheated on her with several other girls of the same age.... not that this guy will necessarily do that to you but my advice would be not to get into this. However it is obviously up to you.


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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 07:09 PM

I agree with the others. He sounds like a great guy, but even guys you think are perfect aren't. In all honesty, the age different isn't that big of a deal. It's only 4 years. However, there is the age of consent to think about and since you are under the age of 18, the age in which you become a legal adult, it is illegal for him to have any sexual relations with you. However, this not being my point, you'd be at two different places in your life: he's in college, you aren't. He's around tons of college girls all the time, while your surrounded by high school boys. You see what I'm trying to say? Things would just end up messily for you, especially when he does turn 21. He'll be going out and meeting all sorts of new people. Whose to say he won't turn into that guy?











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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 07:14 PM

I get what all of you are saying. In all honesty, those thoughts went through my head also. He wants to go hang tonight, but not as a date or anything, just to get to know each other better. I think after tonight I'll know exactly what I want to do. Thank you!


"We've all been down that road before. Searching for that something more. World's spinning 'round. There's no sign of slowing down. So won't you take a breath? Just take a breath."
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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 07:35 PM

I wish you the best of luck tonight! I would tell a friend where you two are going to be just in case. You can never be too careful! (:
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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 21st 2011, 08:51 PM

um. no. bad idea. you'll only get yourself into trouble. you have so much life and youre in high school you should spend your teenage years as a teenager! i mean, if you guys have sex or whatever or get "intimate" (i totally hate the use of that word) and someone in authority found out, he could be charged with rape. it will more likely end in a huge mess than in a happily ever after


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Re: Opinion on 16 year old girl dating 20 year old guy - July 22nd 2011, 03:54 AM

I know it all seems lovely and nice, as does he, but you have to really question what a 20-year-old is doing with a sixteen-year-old. If you were twenty, would you date someone who was sixteen?
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