Online Dating Sites

[JRo122]

I recently signed up for an online dating site. Usually I would never do something like this, but I finally gave into it because I want to meet new girls from around my area. What I don't know about though, is how it really 'works'. Since you can't get physical signs that she's interested, how do you know when to ask for her number, or if she wants to hang out? This girl and I have been exchanging emails for a couple weeks. I wanna feel out if she's interested, but I don't know how to do that online... any advice?

[Madeleine.Claire]

Just suggest something casually like "do you want to go do something sometime?"
It doesn't have to be a situation where there's lots of pressure on either of you, you could just ask her to go to lunch or something fun.
Good luck (:

[Aletheia*]

Maddie hit the nail right on the head! Just nonchalantly ask if she wants to meet up sometime, that way, it makes it easier to ask for her number to keep in contact about said meet up. I know it's hard to determine whether or not she's interested, but go by who e-mailed who first. Did you e-mail her, or did she e-mail you? Does she flirt in these messages? If so, could be a sign she's interested.

[Acheron]

If she's been exchanging emails for a couple of weeks with a guy she met on a dating site, she's waiting for you to ask her out and getting less impressed with you the longer you leave it. Just assume that any girl who messages you back twice is interested. There's not much cost to trying, so you may as well be assertive.

[JRo122]

I was thinking about lunch or something, because I go to school in her town, but i'd have to be like mcdonalds or something because thats pretty much all there is there.. kinda lame in my opinion lol. I messaged her first, but she messages me back every time, so that's gotta be a good sign right? lol I'm not good with noticing flirting, so I can't really answer that one. I'll ask her out tonight and let you guys know how it goes.

[Angel]

If this is a dating site and you two have exchanged contact for a few weeks, it's expected of you to ask at some point, don't you think?

Asking her to lunch sounds nice. McDonald's isn't the nicest place for a first date... perhaps you can surprise her with something else, like a picnic? You don't have to take her to a restaurant, you know.
I hope it goes well!

[Acheron]

Nah, lunch has too much potential for awkwardness, and if all you can do is McDonald's you shouldn't even bother. Take her out for something free. Go hang out in the park, maybe for a picnic like Angel said. Only thing you should ever buy on a first date is alcohol.

[ReluctantPegasister]

Originally Posted by Acheron

Nah, lunch has too much potential for awkwardness, and if all you can do is McDonald's you shouldn't even bother. Take her out for something free. Go hang out in the park, maybe for a picnic like Angel said. Only thing you should ever buy on a first date is alcohol.

Or coffee.... Come on people.

[Acheron]

Originally Posted by Maeve

Or coffee.... Come on people.

Tch, coffee dates are cliched as hell, and there's no way to escalate physically in a coffee shop. Although I have done coffee and icecream on a first date. That was fun, although mainly because the girl was funny as hell.

[JRo122]

I guess the park would sound like a good idea. I'll have to look up stuff to do in that town.. I only go to school there, dont know anything about it haha.

[Jas]

Have to agree with Acheron on two counts-
a) Ask her out right now. It's a dating site, you're not looking for pen pals. Of course it's hard to tell if she's interested online, that's why you meet her in person and go from there. She's as interested as she's going to be from messaging if she's emailed you this long.
b) Coffee as a first date from an online situation = totally not something I would recommend. Is there anywhere you can go for a walk or people watch - and is there seriously nowhere you can grab a beer? What kind of town is this?

Let us know how it goes..

[ReluctantPegasister]

Originally Posted by Jas

Have to agree with Acheron on two counts-
a) Ask her out right now. It's a dating site, you're not looking for pen pals. Of course it's hard to tell if she's interested online, that's why you meet her in person and go from there. She's as interested as she's going to be from messaging if she's emailed you this long.

Actually, on the dating site I use (OKcupid) all I am is looking for penpals and new friends. They actually list it as an option in the "I'm looking for" section. That's not the stich here, I get that, but still worth mentioning.

[Jas]

^Of course - it's an option on most sites - but the poster is clearly looking for dates, and not hoping to keep it online.

[JRo122]

Originally Posted by Jas

Have to agree with Acheron on two counts-
a) Ask her out right now. It's a dating site, you're not looking for pen pals. Of course it's hard to tell if she's interested online, that's why you meet her in person and go from there. She's as interested as she's going to be from messaging if she's emailed you this long.
b) Coffee as a first date from an online situation = totally not something I would recommend. Is there anywhere you can go for a walk or people watch - and is there seriously nowhere you can grab a beer? What kind of town is this?

Let us know how it goes..

I'm sure there is a place to grab a beer, but I've never thought about that for some reason haha.

[Jas]

Of the six guys I've gone on dates with from an online situation...

....all of them involved alcohol except one, which sucked. (Not because it didn't involve drinks, he was just a total creep and liar, which hey, comes with the territory. I left.)

It takes away the edge of awkwardness, is usually a pretty relaxed atmosphere where you can sit and talk, can take as long as you want if it goes well, and if it doesn't go well you can leave after one drink thanking your stars that you didn't plan any all day activities and with a nice warm glow.

Just my two cents, anyway..

[VampirePrincess]

I'm on an online dating site, and I find that typically after a lot of messages writing on the site gets too inconvenient and I just ask if there's a better way to contact them or I just hand over my number and say "text me sometime, since I'm not signing on here a lot right now."

My schedule is always insanely busy so whenever I have a free moment I just make plans. Something easy, too. Public place of course, at a time when you have an easy excuse to leave if something doesn't go well. Like I used to meet people on my lunch break because if something went wrong and I didn't come back, someone would notice...plus I could easily say "well, my break is over, I need to get back to work" if I got uncomfortable.

Since I like to remain very much in the public eye on first dates I usually go to malls. Besides, it's amazing what you can find out about people by watching them window shop All we have here are malls and casinos though, and since I'm still a year too young for the casino, the mall it is. If you have a better option where you live, then go there instead.

[Brandon]

I met my girlfriend on OkCupid and we settled for bowling and laser tag. If a woman is interested in you, that means she's got similarities with you. Can't think of anything? Go with where you'd want to go on a first date if a woman asked you out.

[TylerVo]

She's interested in you when you have scientific evidence that she is. Use the scientific method to figure out whether it's a fact first. If it is, then ask her out. That is the key to use logic and philosophy to determine the answers to life.