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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Theguy Offline
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Unhappy I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 10:09 PM

I'm completely lost and I don't know what to do...
Its been so long since I've had real feelings for someone else other than my ex from 2 years back...
And now at school we have an exchange student from Denmark and she's the most bubbly amazing girl i've ever been lucky enough to be friends with...
That's all i wanted when i first heard she was coming.. I said i want to be good friends with her, while all my guy friends were Talking about how hot she might be and so on..
And it was fine, we are pretty close friends, shes even started coming over a few times. But then it just hit me that I actually really really like her.. i didnt even realise that I don't even think about my ex like I used to anymore...
But whats killing me is she has a boyfriend in Denmark... Even though they agreed they were allowed to "mess around" in a way while they were
Apart, I don't think that means anything like I want...
I'm dreading the day she has to leave... But i'm also dreading if she finds out and I ruIn everything like I always do...
I'm just so lost and I dont know what to do :S
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 10:16 PM

In my opinion its a heartbreak waiting to happen. She has a boyfriend. I mean, if I were you I would tell her how I felt, and if she feels the same way that's great. But I wouldn't advise you to date a girl who has a boyfriend. Even if they said its okay. Its awkward and in the end shes going to go back to him (for who knows what reason) and your going to be left in the dark. I don't want that to happen. Also, in the end your going to feel like it was your fault, when it wasn't. If she really wants to date you, then I would tell her that you wont until she breaks up with her boyfriend.


Exert your talents, and distinguish yourself, and don't think of retiring from the world, until the world will be sorry that you retire


   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 10:16 PM

Finds out what? That you really like her. People are usually happy to hear that.

Feel free to "mess around". The bf is far, far away and and they have privileges so you're not helping her to cheat. You never know what will happen. It could be that she decides she likes you better and who knows what will happen. Live life and give it a try.


What just happened?
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 10:26 PM

I just always seem to be the guy that girls see as a "good friend", a majority of my close friends are girls... But the Danish girl seems like the first girl who could be slightly interested for once :/
I know I shouldnt even be thinking about a girl like her in this way, it feels almost forbidden... But she truly is the most amazing girl I've met in my short 16 years and it's killing me...
I used to be all into fooling around with girls and things, but I don't really enjoy it that much anymore :/ i wouldn't want my best memories of her to be some meaningless hook up if it ever even came to that
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 10:27 PM

I don't particularly deal with rejection very well if that helps...
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 10:43 PM

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Originally Posted by Theguy View Post
I used to be all into fooling around with girls and things, but I don't really enjoy it that much anymore :/ i wouldn't want my best memories of her to be some meaningless hook up if it ever even came to that
I wouldn't mess around or anything with her. As you said, she will have to leave eventually and not only that, she has a boyfriend back home. It is a heartbreak waiting to happen, however it will be less painful if you just let go now. Sure, she may seem like the first person to be interested in you for awhile now, but it doesn't mean she will be the last one.


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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 11:04 PM

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I wouldn't mess around or anything with her. As you said, she will have to leave eventually and not only that, she has a boyfriend back home. It is a heartbreak waiting to happen, however it will be less painful if you just let go now. Sure, she may seem like the first person to be interested in you for awhile now, but it doesn't mean she will be the last one.
I really want to let go and just be good friends with her like we are now...
It seems like everytime we hang out I find out something new about her that just blows me away...
Very helpful though, thank you
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 11:08 PM

Dude, I'm seeing a Swedish exchange student. Honestly, what are the odds.

You said you've had experience with other girls, so your problems with rejection can't be that bad. If she rejects you, you don't lose anything since she'll be across the world soon anyways. If she go's back to Denmark and you don't try anything you're going to regret it a lot more than if you only had a short fling with her. Doing nothing and hiding your feelings from her isn't going to make you feel any better. As long as you don't let them cloud your judgement you're fine.

You can keep her as your friend, but it's not exactly healthy to be secretly harboring feelings for her the entire time. Don't expect her to leave her boyfriend either. The only way you can be with her is if you realize it will eventually end. It's up to you though, you might feel worse when she does leave, you might not. But at least you wont have any regrets.
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 16th 2011, 11:18 PM

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Dude, I'm seeing a Swedish exchange student. Honestly, what are the odds.

You said you've had experience with other girls, so your problems with rejection can't be that bad. If she rejects you, you don't lose anything since she'll be across the world soon anyways. If she go's back to Denmark and you don't try anything you're going to regret it a lot more than if you only had a short fling with her. Doing nothing and hiding your feelings from her isn't going to make you feel any better. As long as you don't let them cloud your judgement you're fine.

You can keep her as your friend, but it's not exactly healthy to be secretly harboring feelings for her the entire time. Don't expect her to leave her boyfriend either. The only way you can be with her is if you realize it will eventually end. It's up to you though, you might feel worse when she does leave, you might not. But at least you wont have any regrets.
Haha wow xD
Arent central European people just amazing?
She still has a Fair few months to go.. Perhaps i'll wait to after christmas
I feel a lot better getting advice from someone with experience in something like this :P
Thanks very much, i'll keep that in mind
Regret is by far one of the worst feelings...
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 17th 2011, 03:35 AM

If your ok with it being short term and you'll be okay when she leaves, then I say go for it. But if your going to get more emotionally attached, I'd say let it go. Most relationships don't have an expiration date, which makes it worth taking the risk. But you know she's leaving. It's not worth the hurt.
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 17th 2011, 08:31 AM

like other posters have said, its a heartbreak waiting to happen. I say that you tell her how you feel. Even if she does not like you back at least you have told her how you feel

Good luck
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 17th 2011, 08:59 AM

Thanks for the responses everyone... You've all been a great help
   
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Re: I'm completely falling for the exchange student :S - November 17th 2011, 09:10 AM

No problems
   
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