I'm getting strong feelings for my best friend and I don't want to

[sergio926]

She's taken. Her boyfriend is also my friend. We have been very best friends for years. She would never see me like that. But she's having problems with her boyfriend and I can't help but think how happy we could be together if we both had the mutual feelings for each other. I really just want to meet another girl to get my mind off of her but I can't meet anyone. I just graduated college and I don't know how to get girls in the first place, I've just been really lonely. I feel like the only chance I have for getting girls is visiting the college I graduated from. Some of my best friends still go there and it's close, so I'll be up there plenty. But I can't stop thinking of her like this, I just wish I could break out of my shell with girls.

[Kekai]

Hi sergio,
If he really is your friend, you shouldn't cross the line with his girlfriend. I'm a college student, and not the best with girls either. It's just for some people, it is ridiculously hard to get girls. And yes, it's really difficult to be lonely. Believe me, I know. I didn't get confidence with girls for a while. I realized that the worst that can happen is I get rejected by a girl.

Here's some tips I learned:
1.) Be confident in yourself.
2.) Respect yourself and girls.
3.) Talk to your friends about how to talk to girls. Some of the best advice I've gotten was from my best friends who are completely comfortable talking with girls.
4.) Make more friends you like to hang around, both male and female. This way you create a network and have more possibilities to meet new girls.
5.) Socialize with girls. Make friends with them. There are some girls who will go out of their way to hook you up with someone.
6.) Ask a girl out that you've gotten to know. It's really not that hard.
7.) Don't fear rejection.

[PSY]

Let your friends work through their relationship without your interference. If they break up, you can tell your best friend how you feel about her, without feeling guilty about being the "homewrecker". If they stay together, you'll be able to remain friends with both of them, and with time, you'll move on and find another girl.

College is not the only place to meet girls. If you have a job, you can meet co-workers and friends of co-workers. If you join a club/organization, you can meet fellow members and their friends. You can also ask your former college friends to introduce you to their single friends at parties/events/casual get-togethers. I know it's hard to find available women at times, but it's certainly not impossible! =)

[LoveFever]

I've had a similar problem with my close guy friend. Have you thought that maybe you're just jealous because she spends a lot of time with her boyfriend and not you? I thought I liked my best friend, but I realized that I was really just jealous of his girlfriend because of that.
Just a thought

[sergio926]

I'm actually not that jealous. She spends a lot of time with me, in fact she kind of prefers to spend time with me. She comes on the weekends, but I work on the weekends. She immediately tries to get together once I get off work.

But I'll definitely let them work their stuff out. I'm always there for them for advice when they want to ask, but I don't ever give my unsoliciated advice or anything.

I just really think I'm having an attachment to her because of the loneliness. She's pretty much the only girl I talk to lately. The only girl who at least reaches out to me and I just know I could have a nice relationship with her if we both wanted it.

[Admon]

Well this is kinda funny. I was just in the same predicament. I fell in love with my best friend and it was a super rough time. I'm a guy and I cant tell you how many times I broke down cause i thought it was all hopeless, they even started dating on my birthday! (jerks lol) but it turns out the guy was a real jerk and she finally saw that. He was kinda my friend but he said somethings i really didnt like and i felt like she should know. I told her and they just broke up the other day. And now she is all about me. I showed her how much i cared about her even when she had a boyfriend and it really payed off. So i guess what I'm trying to say is, if she is worth it, then stick with it as long as you want. Care about her and let her know it. Be there for her and help her out. The friend zone is definitely beatable. Good luck!