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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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CrimsonLines Offline
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Red face My boyfriend might become a priest! - April 17th 2012, 09:10 PM

I am so confused about how I feel. I'm pretty sure I love my boyfriend but he is thinking about becoming a priest in the Catholic Church. I am happy for him because I am Catholic myself and the Church needs vocations but I am sad at the same time. I don't want to let him go. He is on the fence right now. I wish he would just make up his mind about being a priest because the longer I stay with him the more I fall for him. I don't want my heart to be broken. I think it is better to let him go before we become too serious because he might decide to become a priest and leave me. Am I selfish? I am sad that I might not be able to be with him for the rest of my life but on the other hand I am happy with whatever he decides to do because I love him. I know I can't stand in the way of God's plan for him but it seems so unfair. I don't really know what to do.


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Re: My boyfriend might become a priest! - April 17th 2012, 10:12 PM

sometimes it's amazing what a sense of purpose will make a person do.

Purpose will always break rules for what the human norm is.
This is coming from a person who believes in nothing, so I tried keeping it as respectable as possible. :P

The best advice is to talk to him about how you feel and such and he'll likely understand. Perhaps it will help him in his decision, or he'll help you with your decision. Either way it'll clarify your and his current standing in the situation.
   
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Re: My boyfriend might become a priest! - April 17th 2012, 11:52 PM

I'm not as familiar with the Catholic faith as I'd like to be, so please forgive my ignorance. Can married men become priests (I'm pretty sure I heard a story about a married Catholic priest in the United States a while back...)? Because if so, he could have it both ways (provided that he's willing to marry you before pursuing his calling as a priest).


   
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Re: My boyfriend might become a priest! - April 18th 2012, 12:14 AM

(No, Catholic priests cannot marry.).

Melanie, I can imagine your shock! And, I think your shock is very revealing: Guys typically don't wake up at 19 and decide to go into the Priesthood. Especially when they have girl friends. It doesn't happen that way. That's why you're shocked. Me too. Something else is going on. He's feeling deeply unsatisfied about himself and his life(NOT WITH YOU!), and he's looking to resolve that.

You and he need to have a very serious, very quiet conversation about this new revelation he's had. Let him talk about it, and listen very closely.


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Re: My boyfriend might become a priest! - April 18th 2012, 11:31 AM

Hi Melanie, since his intention to become a Catholic Priest is just as far as thoughts right now and not finalized yet, I think there are still chances that he might change his thoughts. You should try to talk to him, tell him your feelings and find out why he thinks that being a priest will be the best option for him right now; there must be reasons why all of a sudden he's thinking of becoming one.

I agree with Dr. Bobby that he might be unsatisfied with his life. I'm a Christian myself and I know several people from my church who decided to become missionaries and left their families and jobs behind. Not that they didn't love them but they just think that they were created and chosen by God for certain purpose in their life.

I hope everything is all well with you dear.


Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition. - Alexander Smith

Change and growth take place when a person has risked himself and dares to become involved with experimenting with his own life. - Herbert Otto




   
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Re: My boyfriend might become a priest! - April 19th 2012, 03:06 AM

Just wanted to follow up with this thread, because I was curious and decided to do some research. Apparently, there HAVE been instances where married men have been allowed to become priests. It depends on what branch of Catholicism you and your boyfriend belong to, but I think it might be worth doing a Google search for "married Catholic priests" and deciding whether or not this is something your boyfriend would be interested in doing (marrying you, then becoming a priest afterward, assuming he decides to go through with his plan).


   
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