Thread: Triggering (Suicide): Feedback on my poem?
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The-Doctor Offline
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Re: Feedback on my poem? - November 29th 2014, 07:58 PM
Your poem is great I love the last stanza. I am not sure about 'it' in the 5th line of the first stanza. I would mayde switch it to monster or sadness or take it out. Also you can switch the the 2nd line of the 1st stanza(Than surrender to this monster) with the 5th line of the last stanza(and that depression is a monster) to start I thought you were calling the sadness the monster. My opinions are purely optional,your poem is very good like it is.

Every hero has a dark side
Every villian has a noble cause
I have seen the enemy and it is us