[Kate*]

I know you said you wanted me to succeed, but not everyone gets a happy ending. You don't get to tell me I didn't try, though you probably would along with saying I chose it and did it to myself and everything else that wasn't true. Believe what you want, you can't argue with the facts. You had the right and the responsibility to decide that I didn't belong, you did not have the right to decide or tell me what I do or don't feel or to use your false assumption that I "lack" a basic human emotion to collapse my entire life and then turn your backs on me.

Talk me down or give me permission to let go. After 27 years of white-knuckling, fighting, and failing through poor treatment, abuse BS, and getting screwed over so badly that you wouldn't even believe it (or survive it), I've finally decided I'm done. You don't get to tell me I didn't try or that it's my own fault, but my guess is that you will; if you ever even find out, and I know you won't.

I keep waiting for you to stop responding. I don't trust easy and you decided to tell me that you'd continue to answer as long as I needed it. Everyone else has quit on me; I'm convinced you will too.