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JazzyJazz Offline
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Age: 31
Gender: Female
Location: England

Posts: 393
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Join Date: September 15th 2015

Re: i cant stop liying - April 8th 2016, 06:14 PM

The problem with lying, as I'm sure you've discovered, is that once you get into the habit of doing it, it can be very difficult to stop. Particularly if you think it serves a useful purpose.

It sounds like you use lying as a defence mechanism - by separating yourself from the truth you perhaps feel as though you are protecting yourself. However, the reality is that you are just making life harder than it needs to be. Lying and, in particular, maintaining the lies requires an awful lot of effort. Effort that could be put to better use thinking about something else. If you do get caught out, people may not trust you ever again. Also, word will spread and being a liar is not a reputation you want to have.

Once you are finally able to tell the truth, I think you will feel a great sense of freedom. But it will take some effort to achieve that. You will have to physically stop yourself when you can sense that you are about to lie. Instead of feeling under pressure and blurting something out, you will need to pause, take a deep breath and think carefully about what you are going to say.

It will take practice and you will still slip up now and again. But gradually you will be able to break the habit and live a more honest existence.

I'm sorry to learn that your parents are splitting up and recognise that the stress of that is going to make it even more difficult to deal with your lying problem. However, I do think that with the right support it is possible.

How would you feel about talking to a counsellor? There should be one attached to your school and what you tell them is completely private between the two of you. You most likely have a lot of thoughts and emotions relating to your home life, which you don't have to keep to yourself and feel alone with. A counsellor would be able to help you to feel better about what is happening with your parents. They could also support you with trying to break your lying habit.

Be kind to yourself.