About two weeks ago I received a message from my abusive ex's current partner. It was completely out of the blue and frankly I was very surprised to hear from her. In it she referenced a post I made three and a half years ago about the abuse I encountered at the hands of my ex. When I wrote it she was referenced in the comments by another person and so I wrote her saying if she ever needed to talk or felt abused by him that she could come to me. She said she was happy to I thought to myself "poor girl" and just left it alone.

The message she sent started out by telling me she was very happy with him, five years later. She talked about how she had mental health struggles, too, and if she had met him in her mid-twenties (which is when he and I were together) it never would have worked. So she seemed to imply she thought she kind of knew where I was coming from.

She told me "[she] kept his secrets and he kept [hers]," but she'd tell me one thing: he loved me very much, and the reason he stepped back when I started struggling was to try and give me space to figure myself out rather than get involved and make it worse.

She told me not to tell him she messaged me because he'd "give her the silent treatment" (yeah, sounds like a REAL healthy relationship) and that I better not use this information to make another post because she'd be a "squeaky wheel" and get the mods to take it out of public eyes. Then she apparently "followed" me, which means she can see everything I post, but I don't see what she posts unless I follow or friend her.

I did respond, after several days of thinking. I told her I was surprised to hear from her, but I didn't really think there was much to discuss. I was glad she seemed happy, but I was not happy with him and that was that. Knowing that he loved me doesn't matter (mostly because I don't think he's capable of love, but that's another thing).

The problem is it's making me question the abuse. Like I know I've got backup. When I made that original post calling him out three years ago, in addition to tons of comments, I got private messages from like four or five people who played with him or were his partners, all saying similar things. When it comes to playing publicly, he screwed up several times. He's banned from all the local groups. People are on my side.

But a small voice is like "did he really love me? Is that really what happened?" I don't know what to make of it. I don't think he did. My best friend says she "thinks he thinks he loved me" rather than actual love, and I am inclined to agree, but I just don't know.

I am also SUPER paranoid that she's following to give him access to my profile. I have him blocked on that site and I am worried he can see my page through her. I am pretty sure she only followed me to make sure I didn't make a new writing, but still. Do I block her? I don't want to be rude, but this is freaking me out.

I don't know what to make of all this I guess.