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erinvenus Offline
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Age: 30
Location: AK USA

Posts: 15
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Join Date: September 11th 2025

Re: Everyone thinks I am autistic- how do I mask it? - September 15th 2025, 02:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Proud90sKid View Post
Literally everyone I known for longer than a couple months has thought I am on the autism spectrum. From people I have worked with to people at bars that I hang out at. I played a dice game with someone today for like an hour and when last call came around and we were kicked out, I asked her why a particular server at another bar does not like me. She told me that everyone thinks I am a "bit different" but that she can tell that I am "on the spectrum" and that may be why. She offered to talk to this bartender about this for me (in her words: that she would buy me some drinks and that would establish to this bartender who is only there once a week that I am liked), which I refused as I don't want someone to go out of their way for me. I have watched TV shows like "love on the spectrum" and immediately feel that I must be misdiagnosed as I am not as severe as people on those shows. However, people in real life tell me that I am for sure on the spectrum. They don't say this in a mean way. Usually they are very endearing about it. However, I don't want this to be obvious to other people. It seems that everyone I am around somehow knows even though I don't disclose my diagnosis. How can I improve my ability to mask? To me, I convince myself that my diagnosis was incorrect, but then I hear things like this that establish that I may actually have this issue. I have even had a couple psychologists say I am not on the spectrum but also I have seen those who say I am without any room for doubt. Those who say I am not do not seem to have the same knowledge of autism as those who say that I am. Two of those who said that I am actually specialize in autism.

I have heard that some people are so good at masking that they cannot get diagnosed. What is the secret? It would greatly help my employment prospects if I were able to do this.Honestly, I have difficulty empathizing with "hyper-maskers" who are able to come across as neurotypical but don't show any social impairment. I would go as far to say that I think they are merely sub-clinical and not really "masking it".
Do you feel more comfortable trying to mask, or would you rather find environments where you don’t need to as much? Sometimes the right setting makes a big difference
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